How many of you would/have applied for this?

Question

PARENT - Job Description

POSITION :
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop

JOB DESCRIPTION :

Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an,
often chaotic environment.
Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational
skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include
evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some
overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites
on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!
Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also
required.

RESPONSIBILITIES :

The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least
temporarily, until someone needs £5. Must be willing to bite tongue
repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule
and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this
time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small
gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must
screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of
multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of
all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one
minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product
safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery
operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for
the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of
the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :

None.
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without
complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that
those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :

None required unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION :

Get this! You pay them!
Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when
they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them
become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever
is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you
actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS :

While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition
reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this
job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs
and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

Answer 1

LMAO!

First got the job 8yrs ago and have since been lucky enough to add two additional responsibilities into the mix!

Hard work it's true, but there's absolutely nothing like that first smile in the morning, the hug that starts at the other side of the room and is at full tilt when it hits you, or the sound of your 2yr old saying 'wuv you mummy'.

Also teaches you to appreciate quiet, lol!

Answer 2

And do you know something?.....we'd do the whole lot again to enjoy the times we've had with our Sprog! She's been an absolute gem for the past 17 years and each day brings another funny moment or tears to wipe away only to find half an hour later that the boyfriend isn't the scumbag she at first thought and that in fact he's wonderful and she's going to marry him and have his babies! We're supposed to be the ones who teach her the ways of the world, and we are, but the lessons she's taught us about all manner of things are inumerable! She's had some difficult times to deal with throughout school eg being bullied but at no time has she ever wished to exact revenge on the bully, she's had problems with self-harm but saw her own personal experiences as a route to helping others troubled in a similar way. We are immensely proud of her and tell her so, we love her with all our heart always and have taken great pleasure in watching our painfully shy little girl grow and develop into a beautiful, popular, generous, loving and kind young woman. She is and always will be the reason we get up out of bed every morning and are dreading the day she spreads her wings to build her own nest. But this is the natural progression and she will continue to receive our, unconditional love and support. xx

Answer 3

Lol I have 4 and even though timed get rough with there teens years, I would do it all again, if only I didn't have all the disabilities , I would do it again. still young enough at 35 to have more but it would be hard on my body. My boys are 17, 15, 14 and 19 and again all boys. They give me no help around the house so that's all on me. My 10 year old tries when he can to help. but tats it. In remission cancer that could come back at any time. Now I have a spinal cord stimulator ! So no babies or more kids in my future

Answer 4

Yes i applied for this position, but gotta say it aint as bad as ur making out, so far anyway, hes only 2 so i have a long way to go. But what i will say is, i will never ever apply again, not even if i was guaranteed a million bucks & a nanny into the bargain lol.

Answer 5

That's if you get to heaven! Why do you believe "bible is the word of GOD"? When it has errors? NIV (1984) "Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. Proverbs 30:5 For example:101 Contradictions in the Bible: 1. Who incited David to count the fighting men of Israel? • God did (2 Samuel 24: 1) • Satan did (I Chronicles 2 1:1) Can GOD make mistakes? Y/N?

Answer 6

Loving Johnny Trash's answer

Answer 7

Shri Ravindranath Tagore, a Noble laureate,said that marriage is like one such house ,where people who are inside want to come out and those standing outside the house want to enter it.

Answer 8

I hear ya! I applied for it and got it! It's the most demanding, hardest, heartbreaking, rewarding job in the world. How ironic, huh?

Answer 9

I did so willingly. Now add a paragraph to describe what being a single parent is like.

Answer 10

I've just been made redundant from that job....kids have flown the nest and I miss them soooooooooo much, so enjoy yours while they're at home.