14yr old daughter unhappy w/ boobs?

Question

I know this sounds funny. It is not a joke. She just complained to me about how flat she is tonight. She is 5'7, 130lbs, 38b. I have expressed to her that she is not done growing. I don't know what else to say to her other than that and to be patient. I told her that she can't compare herself to other girls because everyone is different.
I guess I am asking the mom's out there that have teen daughters, would you say the same? How else would you have handled this?
Serious answers please, I don't have time for stupid answers.
Thanks!

Answer 1

I just want to say, that at that age, what size you are is a big deal. I am a 25 year old mom of two little girls and I pitty them when they get older. I was the freak of my family, as I got very huge. I hated myself, and everyone picked on me, and the boys were always talking to them. I was very popular but for the wrong reasons. I had very bad headaches and neck and back problems, that I still have to this day. After talking with my mother at about 13 year old. My mother and I decided to do something about it. I wanted a breast reduction. After seeing many doctors and have many tests, years later, at 18 I was able to have to surgery for medical reasons.

The best thing to tell your doctor is that everyone is different and everyone develops at a different rate. She is just taking a little longer. Maybe you can go out and get her some bras that will help, like push up ones. Just make sure you are there for her and don't act like it is no big deal, because to her it is a very big deal.

I hope everything works out for her and she becomes comfortable with her body!!

Answer 2

I was insecure about the same thing at her age, my mom said basically the same thing and when it didn't make me feel any better, went out and bought me a water bra. I loved it at first, but then found it uncomfortable and decided that I would wait for the real thing and, low and behold, they finally came at the age of eighteen and I wish they hadn' t become so big. I now have back problems and no longer have days that I can go braless if I want them to remain perky! My friend who's only a b-cup on the other hand doesn't have the same problems and is quite content with them, I swear, at fourteen she was not even an a-cup. Tell her that clothes fit smaller chested girls way better, I can't wear button up shirts, or those nice flowy ones, the first I almost pop the buttons unless I get it oversized and tailored, not fun!, and the second makes me look pregnant! Large breasts also make shirts much shorter than they would otherwise be, in some styles I look absolutely rediculous!! Not to mention, it's harder and more expensive to find pretty bras in anything over a c! Large breasts also have the added bonus of making you look chubby in things like sweaters regardless of whether or not you are. I was big into sports and found that my larger breasts, even when I was only in a b-cup, tended to get in the way. Not to mention the way that most boys barely noticed me for anything else as soon as they grew! That sucked!! Hopefully some of this has been helpful!

Answer 3

The genetic lottery is the source of pain for many people, female and male alike.

She is only 14. She has plenty of time. Some girls don't start puberty until 16 and some start as early as 9. Convince her to not worry about what other girls have or don't have. As she gets older (and you can tell her your own experiences) she will see that some women think that the size of their breasts is all they need. We know that's nonsense. Womanhood is not defined by breast size any more than manhood is defined by penis size.

Other girls have different genetics. She should be proud of what she has and expect that she will develop over the next few more years. Her mental and emotional development will make her more of a woman than her breasts.

Just look at all the women who have survived mastectomies. They are no less woman than they were before breast cancer. Many of those survivors are stronger than they ever were.

Your daughter is just going through the normal growing pains.

Answer 4

well, i know that when i went thru that part of my life it was really tough.

there isnt much any one can say to make you feel better at the moment.

however, as a mother you have an upper hand in showing your daughter that you love her, she is a beautiful young woman (who isn't done growing, and won't be for about another 6-7 years.)

in the mean time, i hope what i have to say helps.

i myself was basically flat until i was about 16 years old.
even then i am now 20, 5'1", 110lbs. and only a 34B.
i have to say that i am perfectly happy with my size. when i was younger it was tough to deal with.
as a young girl you see all the other girls that grow faster or just have the genes for bigger breasts. you want the same thing so that you dont feel left out and awkward.
however, i was able to find something that helped me appreciate my size.
all through middle school and high school, i ran.
i ran track and cross country.
running, is a sport that is a lot easier, and painless, when your boobs aren't bouncing all over the place.
:}
as i have gotten older i have been able to take advantage of wearing all the cute little tops that women with with a much bigger bra size cant.
its easy to just throw on a shirt, dress, bathing suit, or pretty much any top, with out having to worry about if your boobs are going to fit into it or if its going to make you look pregnant.
my older sister has very large breasts and we go back and forth with little jokes about how she will never fit into any of my shirts unless we expand the chest area.
my sister has a smaller frame than me.
:}
also, it may be that she is getting teased about it.
or maybe, she doesnt feel that she is getting the attention that she wants from the other member of our species.
in which case requires plenty of other talks.

at the end of the day, all you can do is be there for your daughter.
wether it be for her to talk to, to vent, or just for your maternal support.

best of luck!

Answer 5

You handled it right. I haven't been through a teen daughter yet she is only 8 but I have five younger sisters. Only my self and my next to youngest sister have small boobs. The other 3 are very well endowed and are always wishing they weren't. my sisters always came to me with their questions and when it came time for the boob talk I told them the same thing. When the 2 youngest were 14 & 13 they were all the time wanting bigger boobs. Now the baby and the biggest of all of us wishes she were like me and the next to the youngest. She want's smaller boobs not bigger. By the way are ages are 31, 28, 27, 22, 21

Answer 6

Well I am 5' 2". 110 lbs. (because I am pregnant). And I have 30B's. She's just fine. And yes she isn't done growing. Tell her that she is only 14, she still has a few more years. And ask her would she rather has boobies the sizes of watermelons dragging her down? didn't think so. Good luck and best wishes <333

Answer 7

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Answer 8

My daughter is 12 and unhappy with every aspect of her body. I think most teenagers are. All I can think to do is to keep reassuring her.

You could also mention to her that I got made fun of for being flatted chested in school. They used to say I was flat like the great plains. Now I have DD's. I just woke up one morning and there they were.

Answer 9

There is really no way of explaining to her as at that age it is the end of the world,only thing i can think of is at least being small she can wear a bra with a bit of padding etc. If on the other hand she was bigger she could not disguise the fact and if she checks out the models etc most of them are fairly flat. GOOD LUCK.

Answer 10

I am 5 ft 115 lb and have large c size beasts and i hate them. At 16 they weren't perky anymore, i can't wear certain clothes without feeling like I'm exposed or falling out, running is pretty interesting and bouncy, bath suits are a nightmare. Tell her that most of the models she sees in magazines have b sized breasts or smaller. Bras are a modern marvel, they can make you look bigger than you are. tell her she should be happy with her body, everybody has things that they don't like, one day she'll see that it's not so bad. Good luck.