i've already gotten my 4th payment of child support...my daughter's father didn't even try to visit her or contacting me so he can see her..he hasn't seen her eversince she was born...what are the rules if we have court dates in the future..is the judge going to look if he visits his daughter? how often do are we going to have court dates? am i required to attend? tnx!
2007-09-20 18:05:49 · 6 answers · asked by Irish C 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
Some of the answers to your questions depend on the state in which you live. I do not know the circumstances as to why you and the baby's father are not together (and it is none of my business), however, I find that often times many men do not visit their children when they are not the costodial parent.
There could be many reasons why a man may not visit his child. Some of them may seem kind of harsh. I hope that I do not offend you that is not my intention.
Many men do not visit the child because they may not be ready to be a father, the mother has or is either giving them too much stress and aggivation, and/or the mother and or the mother's family is trying to block visitation. A couple of other reasons may be that he just does not care and he does not love you.
Unfortunately, many men have the ablity to walk away from their children when they no longer love the mother and if they never loved the mother there is an even bigger problem. This is not right, but it is a fact.
The sad truth is that the system says that their concern is for the child. It has been my experience that the system does not care about whether or not your child's father comes to see your child. All it cares about is who is going to pay for your the child. The harsh reality is that they do not want to pay for your child, so they make the father pay. The courts will not enforce visitation rights. They will encourage him to visit your daughter and MAYBE punish him if he does not, but they will not make him. To the court system, as long as your baby's father pays his child support the system is happy, how your baby is raised and whether or not she has a relationship with her father is your problem. It is not fair but it is the truth.
You will have to do all you can to be the best parent that you know how to be to your child. Hopefully, the father will understand that and want to be involved. Don't hold your breath.
Whatever, you do, please allow the father to have a relationship with his daughter should he desire to do so. It is so very important. Never stand in the way of that. Never talk badly about her father to her or around her. If he is no good when she gets older she will figure that out on her own, let her. If you disrespect her father to and around her remember that she is an extension of him, you will be hurting her and she will resent you for it later.
I hope things get better. Good luck!
2007-09-20 18:40:30 · answer #1 · answered by Queen-T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's paying child support?
And he doesn't visit the kid?
What court dates? About what?
You are required to attend any court proceeding in which you've been summoned to attend. Two possibilities if you don't, depending on the type of case. You may default and automatically lose the case, or a warrant may be served for your arrest.
The judge doesn't look into anything. It's up to each side to present testimony for the judge to consider. The father's lack of visitation may be pertinent, but only depending upon the purpose of the court hearing. Usually child support and visitation are separate issues, and one is not dependent upon the other.
2007-09-21 01:17:36 · answer #2 · answered by Marc X 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally, the Court is interested in what is in the best interests of the child. While the Court is leinient on visitation, if the father is not so inclined, they are not leinent on paying child support for the child until it reaches 18 years of age.
Even though you might be anxious to sever ties with the biological father, the Court will not be so inclined to do so.
2007-09-21 01:30:58 · answer #3 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe it's different for different states but here in florida unless you contest something like trying to get child support amount changed you don't have to go back. Unless he stops paying then you might. It's hard my daughter's father hasn't even called for about 4 months now. And my daughter's disabled which makes it even harder. Good luck this sort of thing really sucks. I can't see how a father can't have anything to do with his child. I would go nuts not knowing how their doing.
2007-09-21 01:16:04 · answer #4 · answered by CynCity 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the father doesnt want anything to do with her, then that may be for the best. A man who wont take care of his family is worse than an infidel and it would be better that a mill stone be put around his neck and he be thrown in the sea *bible* You just do what you have to do in order to take care of you baby. Someday, but dont get in a hurry, a nice guy will come along and would be thrilled to be her daddy.
2007-09-21 01:12:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny that you ask "child support" hasn't seen his baby not "father" hasn't seen his baby.
Seem to me you see him as a check not a father. What was your relationship prior to having the child.
2007-09-21 01:17:49 · answer #6 · answered by Jon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋