i had a very tuff childood and it seems like things just dont effect me no more. I have sex with random people all the time sometimes i myself protect sometimes i dont. I really don't love who iam. i lie. i give up. and deep down i really want to care about my life. i really want to change but i just can't. I'm afraid i will begin to care when i's to late ( when i'm hiv postive, or when something other dramtic event happens in my life) This is a frist step for me saying how feel. i just need advice a real friend i can't make it in this life alone help me please
( i was never really taught in values in mylife) i was an overweight child with parents on drug i really do know how to focus and i really feel the pressure now because my life is in my hand now.
info
I'm nineteen
An Afican American Male
Gay
2007-09-20 16:24:12 · 15 answers · asked by david 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I am not an overly religious person but i do have a relationship with God.
When human beings judge me and make me feel small and worthless i take solace in the fact that God made me the way I am. He loves me, so everyone else's opinion of me is irrelevant. I get my self worth from Him.
You need to get to the root of what is making you feel worthless and what is causing you to play Russian Roulette with you health and ultimately your life. Only then will you be able to take the step towards loving yourself.
TIme for some serious introspection. Spend some time exploring your inner feeling, tapping into them, find out what triggers the need for meaningless sex with strangers. Be open and honest with yourself.. are you lonely? searching for love? Only you can get to the root of this problem.
Good luck bro
2007-09-20 16:42:21 · answer #1 · answered by Chimera's Song 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"This above all, be true to thine self" -- you're young, black and gay, and are (or were) overweight. Cool. Love yourself, you young, black, gay and possibly overweight person! Being young is an asset. Enjoy it. Leverage it. Being black - African American if you prefer the more PC term - should be a source of strength and pride. Being overweight, if that's still in play, (a) doesn't really matter beyond health concerns and (b) is something that you can addres when you're in the right space to do it. You're gay? Cool. Be gay. be a cool, decent and loving gay guy who enriches the lives of those around him. Find another cool, loving gay guy who does the same and hook up with him.
Had lousy parents? Here's the good news: you're 19 now and they're no longer responsible for you. Be the caregiver to yourself that you always wished they would have been to you. Treat yourself right - healthy lifestyle and lots of positive reinforcement.
There's a lot to like and love about yourself. Start doing it. Oh, and consider getting some counseling &/or medication support to help you with achieving that self love/self-respect.
Best wishes.
2007-09-20 16:41:07 · answer #2 · answered by edthespartan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry about your situation but you have to settle yourself down. Stop just doing everything for the hell of it. You have to control your life and have fun. I would definitely set up an appointment with a counselor or someone to help you with your problems. It sounds much more serious than asking people on Yahoo Answers to help you but that is my advice. Good luck man. I hope it all works out for you.
2007-09-20 16:33:27 · answer #3 · answered by Dirty Sanchez 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right you are a liar.... you are lying to us in this question. It's hard to change because you are afraid too.
I was too. it has to be a slow gradual change. Sometimes counseling will help, sometimes not.
Make a choice to change one thing this week and stick too it...
It's hard to do but if you want to do it, the best way to go about doing it would be to get rid of the influences around you...
I moved 2000 miles away. I haven't looked back... that was the easiest way for me to do it... I just started over.
2007-09-20 16:31:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
David, I can't relate to your sexual preference or childhood problems but the not liking yourself sounds familiar. I once told a person that I didn't care whether they liked me or not, but that I had earned their respect and I expected it. I thought about that and decided I had earned my own respect as well. I started working in that direction and damned if it didn't help a lot.
Perhaps if you forget about liking yourself and try to respect yourself it may just be the change that would push you past some of your self destructive ways.
I wish you luck sir and if you want to talk, I do accept email.
2007-09-20 16:38:06 · answer #5 · answered by gimpalomg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your a neat guy. Lots of people would be more than lucky to know and love you. But you need to learn to love yourself first. You should talk to someone. Get some help with depression. And you being gay does not define you. It is a sexual preference. I have had issues with depression in my life and even seek medical attention for them. But the issue was depression not my sexual preference. Help is free at your local health clinics.
2007-09-20 16:38:35 · answer #6 · answered by SHOESAREME 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, sweetie, get yourself to a doctor. You would probably benefit from some anti-depressants. Try to find the things you like about yourself and concentrate on them. You sound pretty intelligent to me! And you are open about your problems. Decide which values you admire in someone and copy them. For starters, kindess, caring, tolerance, thoughtfulness,etc.At the very least, talk to a professional.
2007-09-20 16:32:27 · answer #7 · answered by red 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow... you really have had a rough life. I feel for you. It's hard to turn your life around when you have no example to learn from. If you feel like I'm someone you think you can talk to, feel free to email me. I am pretty non judgemental and I would love to do anything that would help you. **Hugs**
2007-09-20 16:34:36 · answer #8 · answered by Y!A P0int5 Wh0r3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a good therapist.....DBT is the best in this situation....Dialectial Behavioral Therapy. There are many mental health therapist that will work with u on a slide scale based on your income. There is help..if your truely want it........good luck.
2007-09-20 16:33:40 · answer #9 · answered by C C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry you feel that way...send me a message and we could talk...this is going to take more than just some advice...we've already figured out part of the source...a good building block to work on.
2007-09-20 16:31:49 · answer #10 · answered by Bouillon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋