ok I was dating this guy 71/2 year ago we broke up cause of something stupid. We got mad about what we heard and did not talk for a while. I dont know how it happened but he married a good friend of mine and I married his cuz. Me and my husband broke up for about 2 years. In that time I started talking to my next again, we had sex. Now me and my husband are back together and he is raising my baby. The problem I have is my next's wife read his emails and found out. Now she want to know everything and he will not tell her the truth, so she want me to be the one to tell her. I dont want to brake her heart. (even if she did it to me ) She lost two kids with him now to tell her he might have a kid somewhere else is alot. Or to tell her I know he cheated on her the whole time cause he told me and I have seen him. Or that he has been messing with me for a year, Or the holidays she sent alone with her baby girl he was with me. Do I tell her the truth now, or lie to save the friendship?
2007-09-20 15:46:58 · 11 answers · asked by apple m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
people don't understand i told her I still loved him she married him be hide my back.but I feel bad cause she was there for me when I needed her and she took care of my kids when I had no one else. Me and my husband are together he know the truth. My husband and the other guy still talk and everything. She is still talking to me but everyday she ask me to tell her if he id the farther of my baby and if he still is calling me. He told he he id not want nothing to do with my baby he was going to let my husband be daddy but he call about the baby, he sends things for him. He is still doing thing be hide her but that why I don't know what to do? She wants to know everything she was in counseling alot to long ago cause of he losing the kids and then 2 of her friends passed she is dealing with alot and I don't want to lost her cause she still help me with the kids and everything I don't know what will happen if I tell her he is still up my trying to deal with my baby he lied to her big time.
2007-09-20 16:17:31 · update #1
I would go somewhere alone with her and tell your friend the truth. It would be the right thing to do no matter how painfull things will be. You may feel that you are protecting her but she really deserves to know what is going on in her world. Someday this could all come out and only hurt her worse knowing that you kept it from her all along. Her husbands philandering ways could give her a life threatening STD ....so if I were you I would rather lose her as a friend than ever see her lose her life. This will not be easy for you to come forward but afterwards you will feel better that the truth is out and respect yourself more for it.
2007-09-20 17:30:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok it does not matter what other people say it has to be what you feel is wrong and how you feel you own more to. It sound like you want to cover for him and you like the fact that you have him both dealing with you. You sound like you have a a lot of good people in your life you should be nice to your husband and your friend is very understanding you have to be a good person in some way if you have all this people wanting to be around you. You made yourself sound bad. You know people will not get it if it not them. I think you should do for the baby and if his dad you have no chose to tell her the truth and let them decide together what they want to do for the baby cause her kid is your kids sister no matter how you see it. I not about the adult and there feelings it about the kids now.
2007-09-20 23:55:41 · answer #2 · answered by sparkelita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, your chance to come clean is over already honey, so the best thing you can do is apologize. She's already read the email. I also don't think I'd justify it with "well, he was cheating on you with everyone else" either. What you did was wrong. What he did was wrong. And if it's still going on, you two deserve each other.
2007-09-20 23:05:43 · answer #3 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This soap opera is a bit confsing to me.
Are you friends with her, if not I would just tell her that if her husband (if that is what he is) will not tell her then you have nothing to say. He should be the one to fess up not you. If you are friends then I would come clean, you may lose a friend but at least you won't be guilty.
2007-09-20 22:52:58 · answer #4 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did all that to her but NOW you don't want to break her heart?? You let her husband spend holidays with you instead of his family? And she broke YOUR heart?? You were not with him when she married him! No offense but you have a lot of nerve, lady. You don't deserve to be her friend.
I usually just give objective answers but this is just too much, even for me. If you were my "friend," you'd be lucky to get out of this with all your teeth. I can't believe you! She broke YOUR heart?
Yes, she deserves to know and neither of you deserve to be with her. You should not be able to be her friend and she should kick that no-good son of a ***** out on his ***.
2007-09-20 22:57:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, what friend ship? If that was your friend you would not have messed with her husband..and if he has cheated on her so many times and you have seen him do you think he is not doing the same to you HELLO
2007-09-20 22:56:28 · answer #6 · answered by cmore 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her that would be dumb. And, if you don't understand why, ask your attorney. Just tell her that he is a old friend and someone you dated years ago and that you and he talked about old times but nothing happened.
2007-09-20 23:02:52 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would honestly go with your heart. It will only fester and get worse if you lie. It takes a lie to make a lie and they are sooo addicting. She derserves to know the truth, Would'nt you want to know?
2007-09-20 22:54:44 · answer #8 · answered by Rebecca H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg, grow up and tell them both the freaking truth, ur starting off clean right? why carry this baggage?
2007-09-20 23:00:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he is not going to tell her the truth, then you should. my hubby recently cheated on me and all i wanted was answers. my hubby certainly was not going to tell me, so i called her. she wouldn;t even pick up the phone for me. she could have redeemed herself if she had talked to me about it.
2007-09-20 23:38:08 · answer #10 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋