Any advice on what to do to make a Marriage stronger?

Question

Feels like we are stuck in going through the motions as far as handeling everyday task that I feel like just roommates. Only in first year of marriage.

Answer 1

Divorce now before it's too late!

Answer 2

Serious talk time! Share the reasons you decided to marry in the first place...I'm usre there are many and they are wonderful reasons. Then come up with a game plan! Ask your spouse: "What can we do to bring life back to our marriage?" Brainstorm ideas together. Maybe you don't allow enough time for fun activities? Are you both super-stressed by work? Are there other problems going on that are affecting your relationship?
My husband and I use Saturday as our "us" day. We do what makes us happy...together. We talk and laugh and enjoy each other's company. If you have kids, maybe find a sitter once a week or once every two weeks so you can have some time ALONE.
We went though something very similar, but since we caught it before it became the permanent routine, I feel our relationship is even stronger than ever.
Best of wishes to you. Marriage is wonderful, and it should feel that way.

Answer 3

Here are a few suggestions.

1~~Set a "date" night. Preferably something the two of you both enjoy, but not clubbing or partying. This is a way to reconnect and have conversation. *This does not have to cost a lot, it can be as simple as a walk to the cafe*

2~~Make sure that you have time every evening to sit and talk about the day. About what you saw that was interesting, a cool painting you saw, a good book you are reading. *Not about how awful work was or about friends or other people* This is a good way to see which direction your minds are going.

3~~At least twice a week, cook dinner together. Working together to make a meal is a great time to talk about work and friends.

Marriage takes a lot of work and there is no such thing as too much communication.

Answer 4

Sweetheart!!! Get used to feeling like just "roommates" because in a sense that is exactly what you are. There will not always be fireworks and rainbows in a marriage. Do you not like being with your spouse? Sit back and look at them, watch them when they don't know your watching and remember all the wonderful things that made you fall in love with them. Say "I Love You" EVERYDAY!!! Set up a date night every week or two so that you can just be with each other, no TV, no cell phone, no computer, no palm pilot, just the two of you. You have to WORK at making your life better it doesn't just happen...... hang in there and good luck.

Answer 5

I don't know what you mean by "stronger," but here's what I tell all married couples or those considering marriage:

Some of the key elements of a successful relationship - married or otherwise - are:

1) A long list of common interests; things you both enjoy doing TOGETHER as opposed to separate interests and separate groups of friends.

2) A lot of tolerance for each other's differences. As much as you share in common, you're still going to rub one another wrong from time to time. Be mature and deal with it. Separate the small $h!t from the serious stuff.

3) A sense of compromise; so that you can work out your problems with a minimum of emotional trauma. It's marital negotiation.

4) A sense of sympathy and forgiveness. You're both going to screw up on occasion. You need to be able to forgive, forget, and move on with the relationship.

Answer 6

Have an “it’s you and me against the world” mentality. Be each others best friends: supporting and encouraging one another through thick and thin. Act like today could be your last day together (this will definitely sway you from arguing).

Work around the negatives without nagging. Recognize the valuable, not the petty. Treat kindly (kindness is an awesome motivator) and be more affectionate than usual. The more affectionate you behave, the more positive feelings will flow. Always pray together and keep your eyes on the prize.

Answer 7

Date Night! Get all dressed up and go see a show or try a new restaurant. Do little surprises like bring home their favorite dessert, or something you know they've been dying for. Heat things up in the bedroom. Have them come home candlelit, chocolates on the bed, rose petals in the bath. or whatever you in to. Do things you use to do while dating; relive a favorite memory together. That a vacation together whether it's a weekend or a week. There are SO many thing you can do! But whatever you do DON'T go to bed angry and DON'T bring you work problems home.

Answer 8

Try these suggestions
1. Be truthfull to each other
2. While one of you is hot the other should be cool
3. Do not allow for communication gap.
4. Either party of the marriage should be up
and doing in his/her responsibilities.
With the above you are on to a successful marriage bliss

Answer 9

I read something somewhere, ( i think dr. phil) that there needs to be 5 positives comments for every negative one you make.. I try to live by that.. It doesn't take much.. "that shirt looks nice on you", " you have beautiful eyes" , If he cooks, tell him how great dinner was.. You just have to make sure that you let each other know when they do something good.. If you concentrate on all the negative things they do, both you and he will feel bad. also, when ever you walk past each other, touch.. reach out and touch his hand or arm when you walk past him. Grab his butt.. something, anything.. it helps to keep you conected and centered around your romance and realtionship.
good luck !

Answer 10

The first year is ALWAYS the most difficult.

It might help you to go see a couples counselor and talk through your problems...either by yourself or with your partner (much better with a partner). Even if you go alone, you can get some great skills and knowledge on how to communicate better and improve your life.

Answer 11

Make a pact to spend 10 minutes every night just hugging each other in quiet. You will remember all the wonderful things that made you get married. Best wishes :-)