I don't know what to do anymore i am really fed up because i literally have nothing to live for.
I am not that pretty or smart...i thought i could deal with that
I dont have friends...i thought i could deal with that also
BUT
From the day i was born nothing good has ever happend to me actually only seriously bad things. I've been abused in every way imaginable and been through too much and i havent been "compensated" for it...sure growing up with one parent i wud expect me to atleast excell or be content with other parts of my life but im not because nothings going on for me. I have no siblings to share a bond with and ive been for therapy but nothings working.
I also dont want to blame my past because now i realize im on more or less the same page as everyone else but why cant i be someone special to anyone or do well or be content with other aspects of my life?
Im scared for the future and dont think ill ever be socially right and im too quiet...and nobody likes me
2007-09-20 07:05:27 · 18 answers · asked by Blair Waldorf 5 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Everyone is much better than me...what do i do...i dont know the answer...I want to be someone and for once in my life i want to feel normal
2007-09-20 07:06:29 · update #1
you sound so self defeating.....maybe you are judging yourself by what you see other people look like compared to how you feel on the inside. Comparing your insides with other people's outsides does not work very well for a "fair" comparison. Have you ever seen a home that looks great on the outside but is a disaster on the inside, it is sort of like that. I think that you are viewing the world as if you can see how they feel rather than how they appear and are viewing you from how you feel rather than what the rest of the world can see. It is unbalanced.
I know that doing things for others that are less unfortunate helps me lose any momentary self pity I might be feeling in my life. For awhile I was a volunteer at a soup kitchen, cooking and serving food to those who had less than me. I would get there an hour and a half before work and then head to work and have a great day. It helped me to feel good about myself, that I could help others. Hang in there and find a passion that is yours. Good luck...S
2007-09-28 04:39:01 · answer #1 · answered by scsspace 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear of your frustrations.
You don't have to be pretty or smart, to be a wonderful person. And I'm sure you are much better than you are currently describing.
I am totally surprised to hear that therapy didn't work. Perhaps it was the wrong kind of therapy, or even therapist.
But I have a question. Why would you need to be "compensated" for past abuse? No one, and I mean absolutely NO ONE deserves to BE abused. Even if the abuser tries to make them believe it is so.
When we are victims, however, we wind up giving others the power over us, to make us QUITE miserable.
Take your power back. Just because you have no current friends, does not mean you can't find any.
Sorry you have no family. (or at least family you might want to associate with.) Find yourself a new family. There are several things you can try. Volunteer at your local hospital, to spend a little time with children who have no visitors. (You'd be shocked to find out there are children who get no visitors in the hospital.) Or, if you are not too young, or too prideful, you could try to visit a local nursing home, and make friends with senior citizens. They are lonely, too.
Just know this. You are not the first one to be the victim of circumstances. Most of us feel no one has ever gone through what "we" have gone through, until we find someone else, who has.
There are support groups for nearly everything these days. I had a friend once who went to a group for people who had lost loved ones... to murder. Now, those are true victims.
I will pray God brings people into your life that will help you to see how important you really are.
God bless.
2007-09-20 07:32:53 · answer #2 · answered by C Sunshine 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Nobody loves me, everybody hates me...
Your past is your past and anything that happened to you as a child you are not responsible for. You didn't make those people do those things to you, but you do get the scars. While that sucks, every day is a day to walk outside and see the world.
People don't want to be around others that are self-effacing or destructive mentally to themselves. Along with your therapy you should try something to help rebalance your chemicals.
People are lead to believe that once you start taking an anti-depressant you are doomed to be on them forever. Usually a person is depressed because of environmental factors and they just need a little boost to get things going in the right direction for acheiving their goals. Once they had a small amount of success and amassed skill sets they continue to have success which makes them happier and happier through the days.
Everyone experiences sadness and bad things. This doesn't just happen to you. You're not alone. And you do have the power to change it, get the right therapy and medications to help you get on your way and you'll see that no matter what you look like or what your talents are there are people in this world that can and will appreciate you.
2007-09-26 19:20:38 · answer #3 · answered by Wicked 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well to start, how old are you???Unless you are 35 or older, you cant say "never".because you are too young. Life doesnt even begin until after 35.That is the Gods honest truth. You start to realize the mistakes youve made, the people that love you, what true love is and how to overcome hardships. Now if you are over 35, you really need to reevaluate your life. you need a change of scenery,a job change, a friend change. any kind of change is better than sitting still and pondering on what you dont have. You know the other day I watched the movie "the pursuit of happyness" with will smith.It is a true story and I found myself saying "God and I complain about what I dont have in my life, how dare me". There are so many people in this world that are VERY unfortuante.Either they are beat, neglected,living in poverty and many other things.Abuse is a hard thing to overcome.I cant remember who this quote was from but it goes"If you let your childhood continue to haunt you as an adult, then not only have they taken from you your youth but your future as well" Make a list of the positive things you have in your life, the people that you would destroy if you werent around and the things you want to accomplish in your life. Make a goal and stick to it. Climb mountains if you have to BUT DONT GIVE UP ON THAT GOAL.Then when you reach that goal, make another one, and another one. pretty soon you will realize how much you do have. Trust me, I have felt the way you do, so have many others. Knowledge is power,power is strength,strength will help you overcome any obstacle.Dont give up, dont give in. WEAK people quit.Show them all you are strong, you will overcome
2007-09-20 07:15:20 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think that everyone in life has a purpose and that no matter what u will have many successful events and maybe u dont see them now u migth see them when ur older and for the fact that u dont have friends dont think that think its there lost for not getting to know a cool person but rigth now u may not see but some of your greatest friends migth be rigth under your nose. you must know that some day you will be notice for something everyone thinks is special your very special u just have to believe it ur self and if therepy dont work try chrunch it migth not make achange at the moment trust me its the best thing to do at this moment if u feel the way you do and all the bad things will only make u stronger and start to talking to people in one of your classes or at your job and always be urself people then will realize they have missed out on a great friendship and will then get to know you i know i have been there
2007-09-20 07:23:15 · answer #5 · answered by ricanchick1020 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Clearly you have no idea what liberal philosophy is. There is no specific goal. The dictionary definition of liberalism is: associated with ideals of individual freedom, greater individual participation in government, and constitutional, political, and administrative reforms designed to secure these objectives. Liberals are open minded and tolerant. Liberals know that no one is perfect and life is not perfect, but we believe the world can be a better place. Much suffering is caused by greed, intolerance and lack of regard for our fellow humans, even if they hold different beliefs or choose different cultures or life styles. Liberalism is not a goal, it is a means of making the world better day by day. It is very telling that the conservatives that responded to this question talk about money and giving to "lazy" people. They talk about refusing charity to others and justify their greed by saying that giving causes more harm than good. Call it what it is, greed. Jesus didn't tell the hungry or sick to "get a job". He fed them, he healed them, and they went on to live life. Jesus was a classic liberal. And dude, can't you come up with your own questions instead of cutting an pasting?
2016-05-19 03:24:01 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no one ever feels normal.
when you live in a tunnel- where the light at the end is very dim or not visible at all, it's hard to see the sunshine ahead. I lived my life very similar to yours for 98% of my life. Having no friends, and a family that doesn't care isn't easy. It leads to abusive relationships with men -and a antisocial disorder. You will probably never get over most of these feelings. But life does go on. Life changes. and when you start your own life out of your parents house, you will begin to see how. Make your own choices to improve your lifestyle. I used to obsess with ways to kill myself and mutilate myself. I put myself through destructive behavior like drug use and other misguided adventures. I got involved with violent men. All because I felt exactly the way you do now.
so i'm not trying to scare you, but let you know that you are not alone. Other women go through the same things as you realize. It won't stay like this forever. I began to snap out of it a couple years ago, after I had kids. I came to learn that I'm needed for somebody and my past problems don't matter to them. I'm not saying run out and have kids. I'm saying-you need to find the peace within yourself. Don't think that you deserve all the bad things. because you don't. I am a functioning member of society, My future is for me to control. This is what I tell myself. I still get depressed, but for the most part i am happy with my life now. so know that nothing lasts forever. you have the power to change it. There will be somebody to love you for you when the time of fate is right. Put your trust in faith, fate, and love. It'll show itself to you. YOU ARE LOVED!!!!
2007-09-28 03:24:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was abused too as a child, and learn to deal with it and have a happy life. Don't give up yet. The most important thing is to deal with the problem, and make a little progress everyday with your goals. You might never solve the past completely, but you can be happy if you learn to grow as a person.
2007-09-20 07:08:50 · answer #8 · answered by Steve C 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Honestly sweetheart, I think you need to take a good look at yourself and focus more on what you do well. I am so sorry you have gone through everything you have. I can't even begin to say I completely understand because I don't.
You really should look at going to some counseling because it seems as though there are too many issues to address on a simple yahoo answers forum.
2007-09-20 07:12:00 · answer #9 · answered by eleigh0611 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
jennifer, i am so sorry you are feeling so blue! but i want to tell you, you are not alone child. i too had a very bad childhood, filled with physical, verbal, emotional, violence, hatred and no love. i too felt 'not pretty', not special. i too felt totally alone and that no one cared. i was wrong and so are you. people care, i care.
you don't say how old you are, but it doesn't matter at this moment, what matters is how you feel and i hope you will email me and we can talk. if you can't talk to anyone you know, you may find it easier to talk to an e-friend. someone who doesn't know where you are, or anything about you, so you won't feel as though you are being judged, blamed, pointed at, whispered about - none of that.
if you can't talk to me jennifer then please call a crisis line and ask them to put you in touch with someone. help is here and it is there - just reach out sweetheart.
2007-09-20 07:22:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋