Question for wheelchair people.?

Question

I have noticed people in wheelchairs get pissed if you try to help them, and pissed off if you don't.

What gives? Is there a small % of people in wheelchairs who are mad at their situation or the world?

Answer 1

i have encountered a lot of wheelchair users who have the "i hate the world, leave me alone" attitude
being in a wheelchair myself i had that attitude too at one time, but ive changed.
personally the way i look at things now is if i need your help i will ask for it, if i dont need your help ill leave you alone

Answer 2

There is a certain percentage of people in general who are mad at their situation or the world, so it follows that some of them would be in wheelchairs.

I don't use a wheelchair (although I have friends that do), but I have an infant son in a bulky stroller. Not that I'm comparing having a son to using a chair, but there are times when I struggle with doors, steps, etc. I get annoyed when people stand by and watch me fumble my way through a doorway, but also if they jump in and try to help and end up getting more in the way.

I think the best thing to do when you see ANYONE that seems to be in assistance, disabled or otherwise, would be to ask, "Hey, can I give you a hand with that?" You preserve the person's dignity if they don't need help, and if they do need help, they'll let you know!

Don't let this discourage you from being a helpful and friendly citizen to ALL people!

Answer 3

I think it is nice that you want to help but people in wheelchairs are reminded of their disability 24/7/365 more than anything they want to be normal and just like everyone else. They are bitter some of them but it is a tough hand to deal with being in a body that does not work many not being able to be married and other things you know what I mean.
They are most likely mad at their situation but just because one day they could get up and walk that would be great but that would not solve all their problems or answer all their prayers. If you are not happy with little you won't be happy with a lot.

Answer 4

Wheelchair people? That could be what pisses people off. We are people who use chairs. Wheelchairs are not attached to us or a part of our bodies.

We get pissed if you try to help us without asking us if we want help or provide it differently than we tell you how to do it.

We also get pissed if we are obviously in trouble and need help and you look the other way and try to pretend you don't see us struggling.

I am not mad at my situation or at the world - in fact I am quiet content with being a person with a disability.

Answer 5

How about you do this. Go out and break your legs and have to be in a wheel chair for a few months. Then you will experience what these people feel. People treat them as if they are different and cannot care for themselves because of the wheelchair. My aunt is in a wheelchair and one of the things that she totaly dislikes is people who come up and offer to push her wheelchair for her. It makes her feel like people think she is incapable of tending to herself. People act as if she needs help with things that she obviously does not need help with. But when they see things that she does need help with - like getting a grocery off the top shelve at the super market they act like they are too busy to help her. The only time you should go out of your way to help a person in a wheelchair is when they ask you for help - if you treat them like they are helpless they will of course get angry - kind of like if your parents and you went out to a clothing store and they told you "oh no no, you dont know what type of clothing you like, we will choose it all out for you". Give people some dignity and they will give you some respect.

Answer 6

Its not so much that they get pissed that your trying to help them...it's probably how your going about it. If you approach them in good faith..and you go to help them..are you maybe making them feel like you think they aren't able to do it themself?? My son is in a wheelchair. He will absolutley do it himself unless he proves himself otherwise..then he will ask for assistance. Maybe you should change your approach. About "wheelchair people"...sounds like you are talking about a cult. Those "wheelchair people" aren't mad at the world. They are just as entitled to get pissed off at you or anyone else..just like you are.

Perhaps...your just trying too hard to help someone who doesn't require the help. That gets highly frustrating..even for me and I am an ABLED BODIED person..not a wheelchair person. Not sure if that matters...

Answer 7

As a wheelchair user I get pissed off aswell when people try to help me.
It makes me feel like a baby in a pram.i hate being pushed in my wheelchair full stop.i prefer to wheel my self.it makes me fell more indapentent and not feel like a baby.
People in wheelchairs are people too.no matter what age they are they are indapentent.
I'm sure if they are in a wheelchair and look like the need help then they don't.if they had trouble all the time they would have someone with them.wait for the person in the wheelchair to ask you for help unless they are genuinely stuck.

Answer 8

Usually if you just ask they will tell you if they need help, It also helps to look people in the eye. Sometimes you may have to bend down a little or back up, but a warm smile will take away alot of frustration they have. Being in a wheel chair is stressfull enough, then if you got to go somewhere with a lot of people its hard to get around, the stress sometimes causes people to be a little angry, its not personal.

Answer 9

No. Here's the deal.

People with (visible) disabilities often get a lot of patronizing comments and treatment--and people who decide they are going to "help" without bothering to ask are both insulting and annoying. And it is insulting--how wouuld you like it if someone simply assumed you are a helpless vegatable?

At the same time, we (people with disabilities) do occasionaly need a bit of help. And it is equallly annoing if people refuse when we ask.

The best way to avoid pissing someone off--or getting your toes run over!: Don't assume someone needs help--in fact, you should assume they don't unless there's a specific reason to think other wise. DON'T EVENASK unless its obvious that someone is in difficult. But--on the occasions when you are asked for help, be considerate enough to assist if the request is reasonable.

If, despite that, someone gets PO'd--then they have issues--which is not your problem, its theirs.

Answer 10

They are being rude, and yes, disabled people are just people, and some are rude. The polite thing to do is ask if they would care for any help. If they are nasty about it...their loss. My son is in a wheelchair with C.P. (he's 32) and not enough people ask if I need help. I can hardly lift him in and out of the car anymore (I'm 65), but no one asks. I sure would welcome help. We are here to help each other, and those that act the way you state are being unkind and ungracious.