She is so jaded what can i do to help?

Question

I still love her and i miss her so much. i text her everyday and ask her how has she been and she saids she is great. but she is the type that wont open up to anyone but herself. she saids she feels great when her entire world is crashing down. she smiles when she feels like crying. and says she is ok when she is in pain. my heart aches for her because she is so jaded. she doesnt count on ANYONE to be there for her because half the time she feels like no one is there. she trusted me but then i had to go away and now i cant touch her or even smile because she aint apart of my life anymore. i call her everynight and i can just hear it in her voice that she misses me but her heart has been broken so many times that she will never say it. when i was living with her and her family back when her dad and brother lived here in town i used to sneak to her room and wrap her up in my arms to let her know that i was there. the nights that i couldnt do that i would just send her a text saying that

i was in her heart if she ever needed me those nights.

Answer 1

Romantic, not good concedering romance is fantasy and she doesn't need your fantasy. People don't realize that romance actually hurts true relationships, it pushing realist (people who have seen what this imperfect world can do to someone see it in a real light, not a disney love fixes everything light) away by showing them that they can't DEPEND on you to be honest, to be ruthless with the truth, and most importantly give direction. It doesn't make you any less in her life understand, but it does make you less helpful. You want to be TRUELY romantic give this lady some purpose, bring her into your life, if not, help her with hers with honesty not nice jesters. Theres a time and place for romance, but its not there to fix problems only distract us, so help her with those, it isn't loneliness really she can deal with that, but its not having a purpose that can get her out of the heck hole. Really this is why people get married, to help show the other that there serious about sharing the problems together, short of that is getting her to talk and relate everything she can about herself, espacially the pain. Really when you start to really help people out you'll know because they'll breck (cry, moan, just shatter right in front of you) and its THEN that you can hear the truth of there thoughts and their views. Its just she's use to shielding that heart, and she doesn't want to push you away because your the best she's got, but until you get even closer to being her friend, her partner, her lover, your just a better verison of everyone else. Also sometimes when you know they care, don't let them push you away, trust me, nothing more romantic then having someone who WON'T let you go.