We are going to be married 2 years in January. We only dated a few months before we got married. But we have had sex since May. I am 30 and he is 37. We have a 16 month old daughter and I have a 5 year old son. We have had ANYkind of sex since May. Im scared and worried.
2007-09-19 09:04:47 · 21 answers · asked by vrjenkins76 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You should be. You need to have a serious talk with him outside the bedroom. Guys don't do that with no reason.
2007-09-19 09:08:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I tend to agree with most of the other answers you got already.....Lack of sex or lack of desire in a marriage is just the "tip of the iceberg", in my opinion.
You have to discover WHAT is making him act this way....It could be a thousand things! (Just to mention a few: stress, fatigue, illness, financial worries, feelings of inaquadecy or boredom...)
But the fact that there is no physical intimacy is a red flag and you should do something about it immediately!
I suggest you talk to him and ask him what is going on. Be careful with your tone of voice and do not assume he's having an affair....(at least, not yet. )
Tell him you are concerned and that you need to know if he has problems so you can see if you can help him out. Hopefully he will feel relieved that you want to do something about this and maybe he needs to know you care and want to help.
Another option could be that you contact a therapist and you convince him to go to some sessions; or you could also ask your pastor or priest for guidance. Many churches offer services where you can ask for help.
Good luck at whatever you decide to do. You will be in my prayers.
2007-09-19 16:24:14 · answer #2 · answered by Nena S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Answer these questions to yourself and you may discover why.
Has something changed about you, like gained a lot of weight when you were pregnant and have not lost it?
Is there some big stressor in his life, job, parent, sibling that is really weighing heavy on him?
Could he be cheating and getting it someplace else?
Has your attitude toward him or they types of sex the two of you have changed?
How is his health? Any big change there?
I am not saying to blame you, but many times something fairly simple can cause a sex drive to fail and we don't see it.
2007-09-19 16:40:13 · answer #3 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well. Maybe hes having second thoughts about your marriage. But Im sure its nothing to worry about.Men just need time to think things through for a while. Just try letting him have some time. Im sure when his stage is over he'll see that you are worried and scared and your sex life will be going smoothly!
2007-09-19 16:11:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would just sit him down to talk to him. Dont jump to any conclusions right away (i.e. affair) and be honest with him. Maybe something is going on with him that he is embarrased about like impotency or depression. give him a chance to talk openly with you without judgement so you can figure out whats going on. If after the talk you still suspect something is amiss or he is lying you can work from there.
2007-09-19 16:11:09 · answer #5 · answered by Kristi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does he spend alot of time online? Porn addiction is a serious problem, and that might be the case. Does he spend alot of time away from home? There are basically three options. He is addicted to porn, having an affair, or has some issues that he is trying to deal with to no avail. You need to talk to him.
2007-09-19 16:13:05 · answer #6 · answered by s g 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is really wierd. Maybe he is having an affair or getting it on the side. I don't know what any guy would want to go that long with out having sex. Why don't you sit him and talk to him, ask him whats wrong and tell him to be hoest with you. You deserve to know whats going on with him.
2007-09-19 16:09:35 · answer #7 · answered by California Kush 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to talk to a professional. Marriages without sex are headed for disaster.
2007-09-19 16:08:20 · answer #8 · answered by wizjp 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Low sex drive, perhaps from work or health. Have him see a MD and get Viagra. Be sure you look sexy for him when you go to bed.
2007-09-19 16:24:45 · answer #9 · answered by Goodhead 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't try so hard. Maybe he feels pressured. The older you get the slower the sex drive.
2007-09-19 16:18:48 · answer #10 · answered by Brenda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋