Am I Crazy?

Question

ok my husbend of 11 months got a text from his ex girlfriend from like 6 years ago, and we have had this issue with her before and he said he would stop talking to her. well he didnt tell me she texted him and i found out, then he tells me that she called HIS job to talk to him because she didnt get a text back

now this broad is dieing of cancer and i think he feels sorry for her but i wish she would just hurry up and die!

Should i be worried that something is going on between them of is she just a sudistic Bia who wont go away?

not to mention.... when we were dating after the first like six months she called and told me she was pregnant with HIS baby when they had never even slept together

Answer 1

Whats wrong with this girl!Doesnt she know your married they should both leave eachother alone! Ask your husband to see it from your point of view.....and no, your definatley not crazy :)

Answer 2

Is there any solid proof that she is in fact dying of cancer?

Or is this some made up bullsh!t story that she's using to:
a) Get you jealous
b) Strain your relationship w/ your husband
c) Draw attention to herself
d) Have people sympathyze w/ her

Who did you hear the "cancer" story from? Her or your husband? If something really is going on it could be their way of making excuses to see each other and cover it up.

Even if she DOES have cancer, and they ARE telling the truth, I would not be surprised if she is lying about the severity of her illness. There are many cancers and many people that are diagnosed with the illness that are not "dying" from it. People with breast cancer or skin cancer are often cured and live completely normal lives.

If she IS dying however, I do not think it is appropriate for you to wish that she pass on sooner, BUT from the example that you gave and with no evidence, I don't buy it and you shouldn't either. She sounds like a jealous, manipulative, attention-getter that's feeling down and who wants people (especially your husband) to pity her, cater to her and give her attention. Probably because everyone else that she knows is sick of the sh!t and she needs fresh bait.

I talk from experience, not because I'm siding with you, or the dozens of other naive answerers on here that are calling you "controlling" or are too ignorant to see that not everyone in the world are honest and trustworthy.

The answerer that said "he probably didn't tell you because he knew you would freak" was probably right, but that is not an acceptable reason to keep secrets from your spouse. Especially when it involves someone from your intimate past. That's a recipe for trouble right there...

I don't think you're being controlling at all, but you have to speak up for yourself. Say something. It is your right as his wife to express how you feel! Not every situation is identical, but you could find yourself in a predicament that is a lot harder to deal with. One that might lead to more drastic consequences, and from your question, I can tell it has put a lot of undue stress on your relationship already. Remember, the first five years of marriage are the hardest, and communication is key.

I sincerely wish you the best of luck!
Regards,
Mrs. Mustang

Answer 3

Treat others how you would like to be treated....Kill 'em with kindness...did you ever hear of these sayings? After marrying him, and done so for 11 months now, you would think that you know your husband better than that. You have alot more to worry about if there is lack of trust between the two of you, besides this ex. I would assume that the communication between the two is in non-existance, considering he said she called his work due to no response to her text. This is a good thing on his part. He may not have told you about the text cuz he himself paid her no mind and he may not have wanted to upset you. He may not have mentioned the text, but when you found out, he did admit she called his job. Sounds like this situation is out of his and your control. She is gonna try to reach out to him, until she finds something new to do with her time. Maybe change his cell phone number, so she can't get ahold of him. As for her cancer, this is sad to wish upon anyone. It can be very painful and is indeed deadly. I know cuz my grandmother passed away from it. No matter how anal and disrupptive someone can be, we have to look the other way as we can not control other peoples actions...they will have to face God one day and God does not like ugly. Pray for her and you and your family. Good luck and God bless!

Answer 4

Geez, I think you have a few issues of your own. Of course he didn't tell you about the text because he probably knew you would freak out (see your post for proof!).


Why don't YOU stop being so controlling and worried and TRUST your husband. He married you, not her. And give the girl a break. She's dying of cancer. When you're dying you want to tie up loose ends and say things to people that you never got a chance to. Maybe she got in touch with him to tell him what an a**hole he is and that he deserves the crazy, controlling woman he ended up with.

Answer 5

Ok as a cancer survivor the "I wish she would hurry up and die" comment was really ignorant no matter what you feel towards her! I guess if she is dying you don't have much to worry about do you? I am sure doing your husband isn't exactly a priority if she's sick (duh) maybe he needs her to because you are such an unfeeling cold hearted WITCH!! Poor guy!

Answer 6

She's dying. Have you no patience? Have you no understanding or mercy? She's dying and she's grasping at anything she can.

Go visit her yourself. Take her something and share a sympathetic ear. Be her friend these last days she has. She'
s alone and afraid. You will ease her passing and you will gain a lot of self respect and the respect of your husband and others as well.

Answer 7

I would check his phone bills. I bet they have been texting back and forth all along. Why would she expect a text message back if she hasn't talked to him for 11 months?

Answer 8

Hi Angie,

it sounds like this ex girlfriend is "a sudistic Bia who won't go away". It also sounds like she still has feelings for your husband & is saying/doing whatever she can to keep in touch with him. It is best that you talk to her yourself & tell her to move on with her life & STOP CALLING YOUR HUSBAND.

good luck!

Answer 9

Geez girl. My best-friend from high-school was recently diagnosed with cancer. I hardly think you need to be alarmed because romantic encounters with your husband are not her highest priority. Let your ex be a friend to her, invite her to dinner. It could be he will grow to resent you for this because you aren’t allowing him to comfort his dying friend because you’re being selfish, immature, and inconsiderate.

Answer 10

I used to think that men who are in contact with their xs are bad, but not really if he cares about her and is supportive is a good thing. Support him and give him your trust he will admire you for it. If she was up to no good then when he sees how good you were to her then he will come back to his senses. but really dont make an issue about it.

Answer 11

Ask why she contacted him - Maybe she is trying to resolve some issues before she passes away. Offer to have her over to your home for dinner so you can meet her - maybe you two can be friends.