im 23 years old a mother of 2, an recently married(2months).. My husband doesn't want to work an when he does he thinks its ok to work for nothing.. He makes enough for him to do what he wants to with an to heck with the bills.. what can i do to make him see there is more to think about then himself.. I love him an i know he loves of kid(we only have one together) but i can't do this alone its goin to take both of us.. His Mother an Stepdad help out alot an my parents cause they know i can't do it alone but its not there place to pay his way through life... Should i stay with him or should i say to heck with it an move on.. Seems like im the only one that cares in the relationship about what happens with our life an out kids life..
2007-09-19 08:07:34 · 12 answers · asked by pruittsgurl_01 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he was workin an helping with the bills.. But quit his job right after we got married.. He didnt show any signs of being this was while we were dating or up until we said i do...
2007-09-19 08:31:03 · update #1
No one can make that decision but, you...You have to do what 's best for you and your children....If you truly feel in your heart that no matter what things are not going to change then you need to be the one to change it....If you continue to allow him to view your marriage and home this way then he will think it's okay to provide this way and it's not...He needs to step up to his responsiblities as a father and husband and decide if he's willing to work together with you or not....
2007-09-19 08:23:18 · answer #1 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Didn't you know about his childish ways before you married him 2 months ago? Why would you marry someone (or even date someone) who clearly is still a child? He is not a man--no man would go through life allowing anyone else foot the bill while he has a child to care for.
2007-09-19 08:26:19 · answer #2 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One thing for sure I know, they never change. He might say he will but actions speak louder than words. Maybe take a few of the bills and place them on his pillow or in a place he will look at them. Tell him that the bills is both of your responcability. If he dont have much to say then I would tell him then maybe he would do better out on his own! That you dont need another child to raise and to pay his way! If he wants to be a child, tell him to go back to his momma's house.
2007-09-19 08:22:22 · answer #3 · answered by twinkies_22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You knew he was that way when you married him, why did you go ahead marry him. You can't change anyone if think marrying them will change for the better, you made a bad mistake in marrying him. Cut your losses move on by yourself and let some other woman support his sorry as*. He will be the same all his life he is lazy and don't give a damn.
2007-09-19 08:21:28 · answer #4 · answered by Nicki 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have a frank talk with him about this issue...he needs to pull his weight financially and help support his family. Let him know if that doesn't happen, then you'll go it alone and he can pay you child support.
If he didn't want to be married and be a father and support his family (not just himself) he shouldn't have said "I do" nor had a kid.
2007-09-19 08:16:39 · answer #5 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change him, so move on. I am wondering why you married him to begin with. He had to be like this before marriage. Cut your losses, sue for child support. Of course you will win that battle and the courts will force him to work or he will go to jail!!!
2007-09-19 08:12:47 · answer #6 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You just married the guy, and you already want to change him? Where was your head before marriage? If you can't accept the person's ways, you have no business being married to him.
2007-09-19 08:22:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What the heck????
HE IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE!!!!! And you cannot change a man!!! he has to change himself!
My heart goes out to you. A man should take care of his family, and provide for them as best he could.
2007-09-19 08:12:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is almost impossible to change someone. my question to you is why did you marry him if you knew he was like this. if he continues his ways the only thing to do is to move on and do the best you can for kids and yourself.
2007-09-19 08:29:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cant change a man......no matter how hard you try...he has to want to better himself...sorry ...pray about it
2007-09-19 12:12:57 · answer #10 · answered by Mr Confused 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋