Why? (question on teenagers with children)?

Question

Why when people see teen parents do they think they are on welfare? Wasted their life or that it's a diease? Don't teens who have children also have the same rights and ways as older people with children?

Why can't people just call them parents? Not teen parents, teen mom or teen dad but just a mom or a dad? Just like everyone don't teenagers want to see their children grow up to be successful and why not instead of thinking down about them why can't we just help them and not judge them?

I get what you mean and just because of their age it doesn't mean they don't want to give their children the best. I know a few teen mothers who are doing better with their babies then some people who talk about them but one of the teen mothers I know is sorta annoying because she thinks now that she has a baby, she can talk to anyone however she please and treat them however she feels like she is the king of the world (she's basically mean and thinks because of her title as a mom she can say anything she wants or do as she feels to others. other than that she is doing just fine for her daughter)

Okay but even if that is their situation aleast they didn't just abort the baby and are trying to take care of it. Techincally, it is a big deal for them because that's their child but it's not yours and I feel if you are going to pass judgement then aleast help first. If you aren't going to help then don't say anything.

Answer 1

I completely agree with you. Your words are quite wise! Parenthood, children, and the desire to have a family should never be despised, no matter how these things have come about in a person's life. I do, however, hold that it is best for a child to be conceived and born within a loving marriage where both the mother and father are capable of fully providing not only for themselves, but also for their child. Underage teenage parents, in general, do not have the resources available (i.e. the ability to obtain gainful employment, get married, etc.) to even begin to independently provide for themselves or their child. I find this to be unfortunate, but nonetheless it is the truth. This is where family is very important, and hopefully family will lend their love, acceptance, and support, if for nothing else but to make sure the newborn child is properly taken care of.

Thank you for asking this question!

Answer 2

I'm with you. Whats the deal? I was a mother at 16. I am now 49. But I am still known as the bad girl who got pregnant . It doesn't seem to matter that I married the daddy and have been married to him for 32 years, am a home owner{paid for ,by the way} Have a total of 3 children with29 year old daughter who just graduated nursing school.Also have 3 grandchildren.Husband has had a steady job through out. We love each other very much and have never strayed. Never wanted to.But I will always be the teen mother.The teen part I would like to be again. And I LOVE being a Mom.But stop lumping them together.My life is about so much more than an unplanned pregnancy

Answer 3

I was 18 when I had my son. It was back in the 80's he's almost 22 now. I worked three jobs. His father took off as soon as he heard I was pregnant. I had jobs where I could take the baby and I made a lot of money. I was in foster care at the time but my foster parents let us stay. We stayed until he was about 6 months old. He actually lives close to them now. He has a job and he's a good kid.

I think they are called teen parents because, quite simply, that's what they are. People see it as a bad thing. In some ways it is. I know because I was there. Some lady made a comment about "Babies having babies" I felt horrible that she said that.

You're right people do need to stop being so judgemental. I don't know why they think they have the right to judge anyone else but it happens.

Answer 4

Because people thrive on ignorance! A parent is a parent irregardless of age. People tend to stereotype anything and anyone who THEY feel does not meet THEIR own ignorant beliefs. I knew many married couples where the father was 17 and the spouse 15 and up with a child, the fathers served their country alongside me in the US Army. In the military community they where treated just as any other military family and with respect. Teen also includes young adults 17 , 18 and 19 which people tend to ignorantly forget, teen does not always mean 13, 14 & 15. These young adults may very well be financially independent these days and doing very well, there was a young woman 17 in the news that co-developed a myspace type networking site except a year book thing with her brother, this woman is already a financial success. With technology the way it is many other young adults 17+ end up in some very well paying positions. I know two men at work who owned not only their own homes but rental properties as well in their late teens. Success stories are not big news so people constantly get exposed to the negative.

Answer 5

Being a teen parent is very challenging and not every teen parent is up for it but those of us who are should be looked at just like another adult. Most of us teen moms do need to be on welfare at first and some continue to rob the system and that is why they look at us the way they do. I agree they shouldn't but it's just life. I was looked down upon when I became pregnant at 16 and I felt really ashamed but I have become successful and have raised my child much better than anyone else thought. Just keep trucken along and do the best you can and forget what everyone else thinks. Be that mother that exceeds all others expectations. You can still live out your dreams it just will be much more challenging. Good luck!!

Answer 6

I most certainly agree!! I never felt more horrible than when I was pregnant with my daughter (at 18) and after I had her. My parents were wonderful, as I have always been a smart, level-headed person. But out in public I was shunned and criticized. Once in Walmart grocery shopping my daughter got really cranky, she was 2 months and hungry. So I went to the benches in the front of the store and bottle fed her, this old lady and her friend passed by me and gave my dirty looked and said "Look, another teenage mother". Sometimes I still am criticized. I just turned 24 last week, and my daughter turned 4 this past March, when people find out my age, and the fact that I am unmarried they look at me like I am diseased. But I am hard working, I am not on welfare, I pay taxes and my daughter goes to preschool just like the older, married people's children do. Everyone makes mistakes... it's a personal issue as to wether your buck up and take responsability. As a single, young, once teenage parent I say screw the world and all those who criticize! I am a wonderful mother to my daughter... (she never sees her father), and my family accepted everything how is was, and is still. It's a new generation, and the world is constantly changing, some people are just old fashioned!

Answer 7

I just want to say not all teen parents are bad...I had my first daughter when i was 15 and my second at 17...I graduated from high school this last spring, and i have my CNA...I plan on going to college next spring to become a surg. tech....I am still with my girls father....We have our own place and pay all of our own bills without any help from the state...not even wic....When i had our first daughter he already graduated from high school that spring and had a job...we moved out of my moms house when i turned 16..but even when we lived there he still paid for everything, everything our daughter needed, and gave my mom money for rent and groceries....right now he has a awesome job that pays excellent and we have 2 nice cars far from junk...My children are happy and really smart...

Answer 8

Am I the only person here who disagrees with you?

The problem is that teen parents, and I'll call them that because that's what they are, are too young to be having children in the first place.

Teen parents are extremely stupid or extremely ignorant, or both, and this is why I look down upon them. Why would I have any respect for somebody who got pregnant at 13 years old? They don't deserve the same rights because they don't want to live with the responsibilites, they are just dumb teenagers trying to grow up too fast.

Or maybe I'm just a raving loonatic.

Answer 9

I agree. I got pregnant at 19, 20 when I had her but fortunately for me I graduated highschool at 16 so I had a few years to play (go to college, drop out, get pregnant, etc!). I was responsible, went back to school and all that but I was on welfare because I really wanted an education. But people are VERY judgemental about it. Oh and also about not being married. I'm 36 and this was a surprise after 6 years of not being able to get pregnant so it was unplanned and I'm not even with the dad although I moved in just for convenience.

Answer 10

The main reasons are, most aren't married, which is immoral and wrong in the first place.
Then they are not old enough or educated enough to have a good job to provide for the child and medical bills. There is a need for a good education first and be able to take care of yourself in case there is no man you can depend on. You never know when the guy will be gone and you are stuck with this child on your own. They are too young to face the responsibly it really takes. Older people look at all these things and they are true. You may not like it, but I am sorry,but that is how it is, has been for years and years and will be for many years yet to come. Teenagers should think of all the consequences before sex, that is why it is good to wait till after marriage.