Last night he totaled my car while drunk. The police came to my house at 1:00 in the morning to tell me. I had woken up about a half hour earlier and wondered why he was so late (usually home at 10:00). Now I'm responsible for the damage he did to this person's yard and fence, plus the cost of the towing and impound of the now totaled vehicle. Luckily I owned it and don't have payments on it plus I have another car that I drive.
We've had problems with it before because when he starts drinking he doesn't know when to stop, but never anything this bad unless you count the time I had to stay up all night and keep turning him over because I thought he was going to puke and die in his sleep. I've had it. When the police said he'd probably call me to come get him after they processed him I said don't bother because I won't pick him up. So now I don't know if he's still in jail or what. Am I wrong to dump him and get my freedom back?
2007-09-19 04:22:44 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I knew he had a problem at parties but he never drove that way before, at least not that I know of. I let him drive my car to go to school for his night class. If I'd known he was going to go out afterward he would have been walking to school. I've got friends coming over to help me pack his stuff Saturday, but I'm not sure what I'll do with his snakes and tarantula.
2007-09-19 04:37:02 · update #1
No, you’re not wrong, he is in a bad place and he needs to take care of his addiction or else you will have to live like this the rest of your life!! Do you want to be a part of his addiction?? That is not what you want is it? This man that you are living with is not the man you fell in love with is it? Just think about everything you are going through now because of his addiction to alcohol!! This type of addiction is a hard one to fight!! I am not trying to stop you from trying to help him out, I just know that when a person has any form of addiction once they are the person they were before, it is very hard on everyone and it is a heart breaker of many!! This addiction is just like any other addiction he will have to struggle with this for the rest of his life!! He will have to deal with this addiction each and everyday and who he is with will have to help him so he does not ever go back to drinking, and does not get any other addictions when he has this one under control!!
He needs to check into rehab!! The sooner he does this and faces up to the addiction to alcohol the sooner he will be able to get back into life and start doing things the correct way, the better off he and everyone else will be.
I have some links for you to read up and try and get some information on alcohol addiction and other forms of addictions. Just click on the link and it will take you to the web page.
I wish you the very best of luck:):)
Rags37:):)
2007-09-19 04:29:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I do not think that you are wrong. You are doing what's best for you and taking back control of your life. Whenver you question whether or not you have done the right thing, ask yourself this question, What would have happened to you had you not dumped him? And let me tell you, you said that it was never that bad, if he doesn't know when to stop and ends up totaling cars, it's bad. What if the next time he ends up killing someone because of his drinking?
2007-09-19 04:30:08 · answer #2 · answered by avidreader 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not wrong. IN fact, you're crazy if you keep dealing with this, and even crazier if you end up marrying him, and possibly having children with him that would be dragged into this big mess. I'd wait for him to sober up, and let him know that I loved him and he could either get help for his problem, or I was moving on to save MYSELF. YOU are your own responsibility. HE is his. You're very thoughtful, though. Instead of "turning him in his sleep", I'd probably have strangled him in his sleep....or at least beat the crap out of him with a broom.
2007-09-19 04:31:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say dump him.
My best friend has this problem too.
Her husband kept drinking with his cuzins and always left her hanging every where.
there was times when she didn't even eat cuz her husband just wasted the money in drugs or beer.
she dumped him & now living a better life.
i know this is not like your story but Her life was all backwards cuz of him drinking.
So you dont need a person in your life that will be casing problems. i mean live your life..
2007-09-19 05:03:23 · answer #4 · answered by -->TeXas<-- 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are abosuletly right for dumping him. But you are also at fault for letting my drive your car when you know he has a drinking problem. You would have been equally responsible if he had killed someone driving drunk. Don't you see those commercial, friends don't let friends drive drunk. You should have let him walk to where ever he wants to go and get drunk.
2007-09-19 04:37:04 · answer #5 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your not wrong, your are breaking up with him for your safety it would be crazy for you to stay. Just imagine if you were in the car last night when he totaled it, you might not be fortunate enough to be here to type the question on yahoo answers, because you could have lost your life
2007-09-19 04:28:54 · answer #6 · answered by mdsuperstar1984 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused, he drove the car drunk, and you're responsible for the damages he caused? Something doesn't sound right there, unless thats your state law, then I guess its up to you to make it right since you knew he drank, and drank a lot. I'm glad you're kicking him out, what a looser... You deserve better. Way better. Hope you find a REAL man!
2007-09-19 04:47:34 · answer #7 · answered by Beatngu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing. He's a alcoholic and will continue this behavior unless he goes in for rehap. This is some thing he will have to deal with for the rest of his life. He needs to seek help ASAP.
The decision is up to you . Do you want to continue allowing him to be to be a part of your life ? You will have to deal with his drinking, the mood swing , and all the drama that goes with living with a alcoholic. Good luck......
2007-09-19 04:42:26 · answer #8 · answered by Precious 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're wrong to dump him at all. You deserve so much better! It seems like he has a drinking problem, and should seek some help. You did the right thing, and I commend you for it!
2007-09-19 04:27:15 · answer #9 · answered by poetry_dreamer2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No.
I just wish I had your strength to do the same. Mine has never been arrested for drinking and driving, but everytime he is late home I wonder if this is the night.
Stick to your guns!
2007-09-19 04:27:42 · answer #10 · answered by Gwen D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋