Divorced Men or Women:?

Question

Please answer if you are divorced for reasons other than infidelity, physical abuse or drug abuse.

What happened to split you up? Have you moved on? How long were you married? Do you regret it?

Answer 1

My marriage failed for lack of attention. I think as each child came, we turned further away from each other and did not nurture our relationship. We had no family nearby, but looking back, I wish we had cultivated close friendships so that we could have shared some weekend childcare to allow us time alone. I should have set a standard where Daddy gets your hugs at the door, but then Mommy and Daddy get 20 minutes to connect. Instead, it was all about the children.

We were married 17 years and it is ten years later and we share custody and co-parent. His wife is part of the equation, and we gather for important events and casual times together, which my children have thanked me for. I am still single and struggle financially. I am also lonely and sad, but I work on my perspective every day, and count my blessings.
I feel that I have done the best that I could.

Answer 2

This is a tough question. I was married for 21 years. YES, I regret the waste of my life in the past 10 years, but my marriage developed three beautiful, wonderful children which I wouldn't swap for the world. We were married fairly young & as time grew we found our likes & wants changed dramatically. To such a point that neither of us were happy trying to do what the other one wanted. The time came to say we only have one life & don't get a second chance. So the obvious outcome was to split up. As everyone knows, divorce is financial suicide, but to live an unhappy life because of dollars is even worse. The biggest point I can make is that you must never make the kids feel at fault in any way & if you can break up amicably it will save thousands in lawyers fees. Unfortunately mine was very acrimonious & we still don't talk which makes it a litle harder on the kids, but they understand we both love them. Change happens in life & some people can bend & flex enough to make it work, others find that change takes them to opposite ends of the earth. I hope this helps & best of luck with your choice.

Answer 3

We were married for 12 years and have 4 children together. It would take too long to go into all the whys of our breakup but suffice it to say that family responsibility and a measure of financial security was my priority and working and haveing a social life and toys was his. Refusal to be treated for his depression, my nagging and too high expectations, and finally no scrap of being a couple left me empty for a long time. After a year of counselling of which he attended a few sessions, I decided I couldn't live in the marriage any longer without losing all traces of who I was. I requested a trial seperation, just a few weeks to get our heads on straight and think clearly without the arguments and fearfulness. After a 3 days he broke into the house and tried to take our son, minorly injured me and caused damage to the house. He went to jail for the night, I got a restraining order and a lawyer and filed for divorce. He got to go to anger management classes, which was the best part of that horrible night.
After 8 years of being divorced, I still miss the way we used to laugh together before things got so crazy! He is a good person but just not cut out for the day to day responsibility and wonderful chaos that life with 4 kids, a house, pets and careers involve.
I will never regret marrying him and having his children. I only regret that we were unable to find the common ground that we needed to keep some kind of balance to our lives as a couple. Yes, we've both moved on but in different directions.

He is in a relationship for the past 6 years with a woman that does not want children and has none. I live with my kids and have had a long term relationship(not a live together one) that has been over for a year and a half.

Make sure you try all avenues before making the decision to end your marriage.

Answer 4

I wasn't happy. Yes I moved on. I am happily remarried. I was married for 11 years the first time. Been with my second husband 6 years and have been married for 4. I don't regret any of it. I would do it over again in a heartbeat. The only thing I regret is I wasted so much time with my first husband.

Answer 5

I was married for 5 years. We just grew apart. I believe we were both to young to commit as I am only 23 and he is 25. I do not regret it because experience is always worth having. I have also met a new man who is also going through a divorce and it was a lack of love and a very big age gap. I and my new boyfriend I believe both left for a lack of love in our previous relationship. One must be happy to be productive. I believe that things happen for a reason and this is a good enough reason to not be bitter. Thanks for asking the question.

Answer 6

1.We or should I say , I changed and he didn't
2. Yes, I moved on right away and have been with a wonderful man for the last 5 years.
3. We were married for almost 13 years.
4.No, not at all, my only regret was not ending it sooner.

Answer 7

I lived with my ex for three years and then we got married. We were married for one and a half years before we seperated.

I've had a couple short relationships after. Had fun. And then I met my current boyfriend and we have been living together for the past three years.

I never regretted going through these situations. Actually, this made me who I am today. It's either you learn from a situation or you allow a situation to break you.

Answer 8

My ex had a drinking habit that controlled him. He became a mean drunk and lost jobs, his license and started degrading me. I was married for 5 yrs. Do I regret getting married, sometimes. Do I regret getting a divorce, no. I am better off, and so are my kids. I stood by him for so long until he decided his drinking was more important than his family, that's when I ended it.

Answer 9

People change over the years and grow apart . Marriage takes work to keep it fresh and alive and sometimes one person refuses to try anymore. I was married for 25 years and my ex became ill. He had a drastic personality change and wanted the freedom to try new things. After years of his mood swings it was refreshing to come home to a happy house. The only thing that I regret was that my ex spent the last few years of his life alone.

Answer 10

I never did love him and all he wanted was a bed partner, yes I have moved on and am happy now... was married for 15 yrs.
shouldn't have been married at all, but long story... my dad made me get married because he didn't won't be around anymore and no i was not pregnant.. my father just didn't give a crap about his kids at all.