What do you do about someone who has an extremely annoying personality?

Question

I think it's wrong what others are doing to this individual. They are ignoring her. In my opinion that is very wrong. But she greatly irritates me too. Will she have no choice, but to eventually change in this environment? I feel embarrassed for her. I want to tell her that it doesn't matter what others think, but sometimes being yourself in this society is not acceptable. I feel that in some ways she is a mirror of myself or maybe she is a mirror of all the negative things that we hate about ourselves. She represents it. What should I do? If I were in her position what would I do? Happiness is fleeting. I wish everyone was happy. I wish people didn't form clicks. ;(

Answer 1

You're so nice!!

What is this person doing?

Answer 2

Depending on your situation you can do several things. Ignoring them is an option. It's obviously not your favorite option. The second option is to open up dialog with people. I have often found that people who have very annoying tendencies lack self esteem or do not know how to react in social situations. Being honest with them can be hard and sometimes seem mean especially when someone lacks self esteem but it can also be productive. And the more you interact with them even if you don't discuss their behavior the more likely they are to be socially comfortable around you and generally less annoying.

You can also react to specific socially stigmatized behavior. This way you help her or him one step at a time. For instance, I had a friend when I was in middle school who smelled pretty bad. She was made fun of for smelling funky but did not react the way we would to the attacks against her smell. She did not "clean up her act". As I grew to know her better I found out that where she was from (Romania in a very poor village) they did not take baths except on a monthly basis because water was scarce. Her parents habits grew into her habits and she bathed less frequently than the rest of us. When I finally approached her about this, she did not realize that Americans took baths as often as we do. Once explained she understood and suddenly people stopped picking on her for that habit. In fact she became a model after high school and is still modeling as far as I know.

Sometimes personality traits can be affected by simple discussion too. I had a friend who finished everyone's sentences. Extremely annoying, he didn't realize he did it, and in fact considered that to be a method of agreeing with you because that's how his dad showed he agreed with you. After a couple of times reminding him not to do it, he stopped and found better ways to show agreement.

But sometimes when a person is older I just let it go realizing that at some point people stop being willing to change and are just going to be annoying regardless of what you say.

Answer 3

If she is happy and likes herself then it doesn't matter, but I would guess she is wondering why others are ignoring her and maybe she does know but doesn't know how to change. More then likely her annoying ways come from one or both of her parents and thus doesn't know this is negative. It is sad because she could live a long lonely life if she doesn't change at least a little.

Answer 4

Trying to save people from themselves is usually a lost cause.

Ignoring the annoying is actually fairly polite. It's a real step up from the more traditional solutions involving sticks and stones and breakage of bones.

Hey, don't be cruel or anything, but making your personal happiness dependent on 'World Happiness' is just silly.

Answer 5

i am a person that would ignore her. i am not unfriendly but i just make conversation straight and to the point. for example, i am standing in a room reading a news paper and the person in question walks in and says "hey! did you see the sunrise this morning" my reply would be "yes".......uncomfortable silence.......she leaves the room and thats it. its a real conversation stopper. some times, for the really persistant person you might have to use a few more yes and no's but there is only so many topics that a person can think up. before having to give up. sometimes i do have to fight it because there is some things i would really like to reply about but i know that if i do it could mean that now you have a really annoying person that no one will talk to that thinks you are their only friend. maybe thats mean maybe it's not. most annoying people are selfish greedy or hateful and they deserve it anyway.

Answer 6

There isn't a whole lot to do. People who are very annoying and don't want to accept that they have a problem (I know exactly what you mean) need to see a psychiatrist, and they won't do that until they hit bottom. So supporting them and encouraging them despite how obnoxious they are is usually the worst thing you can do. They won't change or even seek help unless they have no other choice. Sometimes not even then.

Answer 7

It is possible that she would like to be alone and be irritating to others is one way to accomplish this. Your embarrasment for her aside, she may not care about others ignoring her -- in fact, she may actually prefer this.

I care little of what others think of me. It's their thoughts and therefore their problem. If anyone finds me irritating then, it would likely do them well to avoid me. I have no real plans to change me because someone else might be irritated.

The issue is that of others accepting this person without judgment. For every person we judge, there is likely at least one person judging us.

I applaud her for being herself.

Answer 8

You didn't specify particular point what and how she irritates others. Is it her looks, her attitude, or her behavior? If your subject is a relative, bear with it. If you were her, look yourself in the mirror. Ask yourself what's wrong, ask what you want to do, and listen what yourself tell you!

Answer 9

Pray for that persons happiness... Let her worry about herself... Who cares what others think... It's an act of futility. Be happy and worry about yourself. Be responsible for your actions and good to others... The universe will take care of the rest!

Answer 10

ur just lucky that shes is not the boss then the whole scenario of pityness may become upside down....

i wish u well...

Answer 11

I would say go to that person and confront them honestly and talk to them about your problem with their personality