So I just turned 20 and my boyfriend and I have been together for 2years now, he's ready to get married. But I think 2 peopel should go through a really bad time (together) and make it throught that bad time together before they should get married. So if we dont have something that bad happen to us then how old should we be before we get married. We are in college right now
2007-09-18 14:12:51 · 10 answers · asked by lil_reddevil15 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am 20 also. I dated this guy for 2 years as well. We got married on 03/30/07. We never fight nor have we ever so just because you haven't had something bad happen doesn't mean you wont make it :)
2007-09-18 14:20:22 · answer #1 · answered by Tracey W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why?! You have years to enjoy singlehood, figure out who you really are and what you really want to be/do/enjoy/believe in. My husband and I have been married for decades and didn't go through any really bad times together before we got married, but we'd both been in previous serious relationships and I was 26 and he was 28 when we married. At 20 you're way too young to tie yourself down like that -- both of you. Often someone who's thinking about marriage that young or pressuring someone into marriage is very insecure and needy and thinks this is the only person who could ever want him or her, or wants to have the security of that other person and is controlling. Enjoy yourselves, but don't get pregnant or married now. If you're meant to be together, you can wait a few years and get some life experience -- singly or with the other person. Listen to your gut that's telling you to wait and WAIT. I know it's hard to imagine that an old couple with children your age can be happily married and having fabulous sex, but it can happen if you pick the right person! My (handsome!) husband and I are best friends and still enjoying each other and love doing things together. I wish the best for you too! I almost married a guy from college who was an abuser and thank God I didn't. A month after I broke the engagement I met my husband, and two years later we got married. Plus, I have to wonder about the meaning subconscious or otherwise of you typing "merry" instead of marry ... If you're merry as a young single, stay that way and enjoy it for awhile! At 20, your life is just beginning!
2007-09-18 14:30:32 · answer #2 · answered by MEG 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have to ask when would a good age be or the right time be, in order to get married.....then I would say you should wait. You two could get married now and live happily ever after......but I am 7 years your senior and who I was at 20 is soooo different than who I am today. You are a Women, that is growing and maturing. If he is the right guy for you and he loves you like he seems to, then he will have no problem waiting until your done with college. Then the two of you can focus on your careers and lives together!
Good luck! I wish you the best! =D
2007-09-18 14:26:49 · answer #3 · answered by stinkerblinker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not think that you should get married yet. I was 19 and my husband was 21. We have had very hard times and have gotten through them together, but it would have been much easier and enjoyable if we had only waited a couple of years or at least until we had BOTH graduated college. I finally finished college and I am now 25 and my husband is continuing his and I wish I could help him more, but my career is just beginning. So be patient, if it is to be then good or bad times you will be married to one another - for now enjoy. Don't be blinded by the destination, enjoy the journey.
2007-09-18 14:24:17 · answer #4 · answered by Hill 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got married at 21 (i promised my dying grandmother that i would wait til i was 21) - marriage has been difficult and we have been married now for 17 years - it just takes alot of work and communication!!! I don't think there is any right age. I had alot of people tell me i was too young but i am still with the man i love and married.
2007-09-18 15:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by gr8tlife4me2 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your college years can change your outlook on life so much. There's nothing wrong with a long engagement, but I wouldn't get married until after you finish college. Certainly don't have babies until a year or two after you are married! By then your personalities and world views are pretty well consolidated.
2007-09-18 14:59:31 · answer #6 · answered by Rosie_0801 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you will be one of the fortunate ones and dont have many bad times.
If you love and trust and respect him, then whether your married or not, you will be able to get through the bad times.
If you are unsure about whether you want to marry him, then wait a little longer.
Have a long engagement!
Good Luck
2007-09-18 14:21:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change the words from "bad time" to "stressful time." Moving is stressful, final week is stressful. a road trip together can be stressful. Going camping can be stressful. Dealing with a death in one of your families is stressful. I think that how you deal with each other during stressful or bad times tells a lot. Do you bicker or snap or do you work together as a team, or each do his own studying and meet after finals.
2007-09-18 15:09:09 · answer #8 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just become an adult, did u ask yourself this,
What if I divorce???
What happens if he wouldn't like me anymore, like after we're 30-40 years???
Lemme tell u a story:
My friend's aunt got married at this age, but then they BROKE up because when she was 37 and so was her husband, he was
1:ignoring her
2:acting different then when was boyfriend
3:screaming when fighting
I know this doesn't happen with your bf, but JUST SAYIN'
2007-09-18 14:45:47 · answer #9 · answered by Vanity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wait until after college.
2007-09-18 14:22:14 · answer #10 · answered by liz 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋