After 2 years of a very hard divorce (and 12 married), I was finally able to get rid of the anger. But I needed that. That is what kept me moving. However, as soon as I decided it was time to get rid of the anger, I noticed why I married her and the feelings flourished again. We also have a wonderful daughter. But she is in a long term relationship (1 year). Should I just let her go? Forever?
2007-09-18 12:26:19 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
let her go. I think you are only feeling nostalgia and you might have some unconscious jealousy because she has a new man...
instead of warming up old food....
look for a new start in your own life. I suppose you are still young enough to believe in yourself and in the miracle of love... it is there somwhere waiting for you
good luck and b good
2007-09-18 12:42:20 · answer #1 · answered by GreenEyes 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think you should let her go too. Does it really matter how you feel because if it did you two would still be together. I'm going thru a seperation/divorce and I have been married 12 years just like you and we have 2 children. I feel like once the love is gone it's gone and I gues it's ok to tell her how you feel but doesn't she know that already - Of course she does. Let her go and move on. I know that's easier said than done. I just don't think she'll leave the dude that she's been with for a whole year to come back to you...she's obviously happy. I went back to my husband after we were seperated for almost 2 years and I still cheated with the other dude because I wasn't happy that's the reason I left the first time. Take it from someone who's been there and still going thru it. You don't need anymore heartache you've been through enough. It'll only end in disaster. I'm sorry but that's just the way it is.
Good Luck
2007-09-18 12:56:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
As was the case with my ex, there were reasons why the two of you divorced in the first place. They are likely very deep issues that aren't easily going to be overcome. If you two have any hope of getting back together, you both need to sit down with a therapist and work through those issues with the expressed goal of reconciling. If she isn't willing to do this, then it really is over and you need to move on. Mine ex saw everything as my fault and wasn't willing to even entertain the thought that she might have contributed to the breakdown of our marriage.
2016-03-18 08:26:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been where you are (just the divorce part) and now I have a 2yr relationship with my fiance. If my ex comes to me and asked me to go back I would say thanks but we tried 12 years and it didn't work, what makes you think this time it will?
I understand, I was so mad at my ex, I hated him with all my heart, but once I let go and looked at our past together and see my daughter I know why I try for many years to stay together, however after 2 years of being apart I do not wish to go back.
We learned from our mistakes. Now that you are ready to move on you need to find out who you are and what makes you tick and once you are good and ready the love of your life will knock at your door.
Best wishes!
2007-09-18 12:39:37 · answer #4 · answered by chilanga26lasvegas 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think this is up to you and the strength that you if have in your bean. I can say that I as a person would and will always try and be with that person that I love because that is who my heart desires. But it is hard if you see she is with someone else, but is she happy? Its a risk! A huge risk but if you are not scared and you are ready to do whatever it takes then go for it! I think its hard for a woman to forget her first love. But have you changed those things that made you all disagree? Have things gotten different? Are you stronger than before? I ask you these things because these are the goals I seek to achieve before going back to speak to my formber love. I hope all works out and that you can mend your relationship.
2007-09-18 12:44:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say let her go for now. If she is in a new relationship and she is happy then it is not right for you to interfere in that. It is wrong to put her through that. If things with her new relationship do not work out then I would recommend talking to her about your feelings. I am not even sure that I am giving you good advice because I have no idea why the two of you divorced to begin with.
2007-09-18 12:37:05 · answer #6 · answered by Missy 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think i feel the same about my ex after six years, not sure whether i still love him but certainly have strong feelings and get on now better than ever, dont if im mistaking that. time will tell. as for you, if you know what your true feelings are then you must tell her, to at least give her the choice to make the decision. dont carry a burden of regret. u have nothing to loose. trust me. gud luck.
2007-09-18 12:42:58 · answer #7 · answered by missred 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all there is a reason why you are divoice and you got rid of your anger and it kept you moving on and now you want to go back in time. You have a wonderful daugher together and thats what makes you think you want to go back for your daughers sake. Listen it is time to let go and move on because she has found someone else and you need to do the same.
best of luck
2007-09-18 13:28:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's easy to get stuck on the "good" memories of an X. What you need to do is when you feel like getting back together, think of all the crap that caused the divorce in the first place. THAT is the stuff that you will first get re-acquainted with if you get back together. Sorry that sounds so negative!
2007-09-18 12:33:59 · answer #9 · answered by K M 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Approach her, talk to her. Marriage is for life. Real men just don't admit to there mistakes, they try to rectify them.
My cousin waited 20 years for her husband, to bad it came 1 week before he died
life is short, It's worth a try.
May God help and give you strength
2007-09-18 12:44:10 · answer #10 · answered by cmrwash 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋