I recently added a posting titled (Am I being Selfish /Am I Wrong). Basically it was about my daughter's father being upset because I only gave him a week and a half notice about the day/time I was getting her Christened. He's not an active part in my baby's life and he has only seen her 7 times (she's 6 months old).
Well the Christening was this past Sunday and he did not show up. He called me right after service was over but I refused to answer the phone. I spoke with him the next day and he said that the reason that he did not show up is because he did not have the address. I sent him the name of the church and the address when I frist told him of the plans. He has been calling and sending me text messages for the last two days cause he knows he messed up. I refuse to speak with him. I'm very hurt and disappointed. I'm telling him the next time that he see's my baby he will have to take me to court for surprivised visitation, but a part of me doesn't think that he cares either way
2007-09-18 05:51:09 · 8 answers · asked by Proud mommy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
so not sure which direction to go
2007-09-19 07:27:55 · update #1
ok i went through this when i was little. the only father i have is my step father, and you know what my real dad never cared about me and to this day still dont. so i think that it is his loss. but you will have to tell her why her father is not there in her life. and you will have to try and contact him if she wants to meet him. so id tell him geow up be a man and take care of his kid that he helped make. and if he dont take him to court for child support. and keep a log of when he calls and when he comes to see her. so times and dates and everythingsaid in the phone calls ok.but then make sure when she is oldenough you tell her how her dad is a jerk and never wanted anything to do with her. dont hide it from her. wait til she is mature enough to hear it ok
2007-09-25 04:31:03 · answer #1 · answered by tommysgurl_4502214 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man he screwed up big time. But he is the father and being revengeful is not going to make it any easier for him to be the father. Try to cool off and think before you doing anything rash.
You sounds really angry and sometimes thats not the best time to make big decisions.
This doesn't mean he can't be a good father someday...your daughter will love him someday and she'll learn about forgiveness if you show her. Good luck!
2007-09-23 17:56:26 · answer #2 · answered by Ernie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all if the father really cared, he'd have made every effort to be there. Then if he truly didn't know the address but knew the date and time, he'd have called and asked. Finally, it seems more to me that this guy is just trying to make life miserable for you and you shouldn't let him do it.
2007-09-18 13:01:18 · answer #3 · answered by David 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"part of me doesn't think that he cares either way "
part of you sound right. But try to take the high road. I always invite my xwife to my kids events. Sometime she shows sometimes not. The good thing is I've gone the right thing. But in time you need to talk with your daughter and tell her that sometime daddy is busy and you should not count on him always showing up, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care. That maybe a white lie but it is better then hate in a child's mind. good luck. It gets easier.
2007-09-18 13:05:40 · answer #4 · answered by specail ed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just always remember, it's about the child's feelings and not yours. Your child didn't even notice he wasn't there. Why do you care if he is there since he sounds like a total loser. Care for your child and forget about him. You are spending good energy on someone who isn't worth it. Spend that energy on your child. Don't let him control your feelings. Let it roll off your back. You contacted him, he didn't attend, I guess he didn't know how to call you and get the address if he didn't have it. He's not worth it.
2007-09-18 13:26:11 · answer #5 · answered by gma 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he really messed up & he seems irresponsible, my advise would be to go to court & get custody if u haven't already but try to keep him in you're childs life as much as possible, i mean still invite him to every event of the child's because believe me you dont want any part of you're child feeling sad about her dad not being there for her on you're conscience.if he knows that you are going to put full responsibility on him hopefully he will step up to the plate.
god bless
2007-09-24 15:46:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you think you have to do and if this guy is as big of a jerk as he seems to be you are better off without him and you baby deserves better.
2007-09-23 19:57:19 · answer #7 · answered by mamawmessedup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is the father and he has rights, just like you.
2007-09-24 21:56:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋