2007-09-18 05:30:43 · 5 answers · asked by livinlifetothefullest 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My best friend's son was incarcerated for a while, and to me he's just like my son.
It doesn't help if you blame yourself, because you didn't do the crime, he/she did it, your child made the choice, and I am pretty sure that he/she knew that it was the wrong one. Once your child accepts, that the reason that he/she is behind bars because of their own action, that child can start changing their outlook and behavior.
You could help, by accepting that it was their error not yours. The what if's in life can kill you but not help. In cases like these family counseling can help, because obviously you feel that your child is punishing you for something and this is their way of getting attention. Sit down and talk without any recriminations on either side, and get to the root of the problem, and to referee all of this you need the presence of an unbiased person.
2007-09-18 05:40:20 · answer #1 · answered by judyrobins14 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't have a child incarcerated, but I have words of encouragement for you..... No matter what you are going through know that even in the midst of your suffering there is a higher being looking down upon you and your child and isn't it funny how in your darkest hour you feel so alone and helpless? Well that's when you are comforted the most. Stay strong for your child and always pray. I would also like to tell you that this is just for a season trouble doesn't last always. You may not be religious but they say weeping endures for a night but joy comes in the morning. Midnight only last 1 minute. 60 seconds and after that minute is up, remember you have made it yet another day. You and your child will be in my prayers. Take care and be strong.
2007-09-18 05:40:16 · answer #2 · answered by aspen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My brother did about 5 months in a federal penitentiary and then 3 more months in a boot camp facility back in 2003, for drug-related charges. My mother was devastated during the time span from his initial arrest to the day he was released. I remember one day she got so upset because she had missed his phone call and she hadn't talked to him for about 2 months prior, and she must have cried for an hour or two because she missed the call. It was a hard time for all of us, especially when we were granted visitation privileges and it was so hard to see him in that prison jumpsuit every weekend. I guess the only advice I can give to someone in that situation is to just look forward to the day when it will all be over, and in the meantime be as positive and supportive as you can be. Also, create a support system of friends and relatives you can talk to when you start getting too upset over the thought of your child in prison. One more piece of advice- don't feel guilty whenever you catch yourself being happy or having fun. My mom used to do that, and she would almost get angry with herself for having a good time and forgetting about my brother for a second, but it is the healthy thing to do. You will get through it.
2007-09-18 05:45:19 · answer #3 · answered by fizzygurrl1980 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a child, but a nephew I was very close to. It was very difficult, knowing what he was there for. But I remained supportive and caring...really that was all I could do. He is out now and doing much better.
2007-09-18 05:36:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cope what?
At least him/her is in a safe place, its "giving time" to think thru with the advantage to make better choice's next time.
2007-09-18 05:45:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋