We have been married for 6 years now have 3 beautiful boys by the age of 5, 3 & 1. We stay with the in-laws ...(father, mother, sister, her children),...okay question is.....how can i get my man to move out buy a place of our own that we could both give our 3 boys. He thinks investing in a house is insane when he has the family house to invest in...doing renovation & all....so what can i say to the man to change his mind....help me...need ideas your input would be nice
2007-09-17 18:54:10 · 10 answers · asked by Juls.fj 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Okay.. the term "Change" along with your man.. is a no go.
I can understand wanting a home of your own for you and the boys.. but the market, let's be real, is crazy right now.. number one.. secondly.. it's never good to change your man and what he believes..
You should accept his idea, and try to help him in what he's doing.. even if at first you disagree.. but try to see it from his point of view..
Also, you probably benefit living with his family.. helping with the kids, and giving them a richer family environment that way too.
I know how you feel.. just for now respect his feelings, and try to go along with it...... he may change in time.. but he needs to change his mind on his own..
The thing is.. if you do something to change his mind, and then you get him into a house like you want.. the first time it gets to expensive, or something goes wrong with it.. he's going to blame and resent you for talking him into it.
Let it go.. think of it this way.. if you have to choose between a house or your spouse.. I'd like to think you'd choose your husband.
2007-09-17 19:07:14 · answer #1 · answered by Chris 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just tell him you want your own private home and you married him and not the rest of his family. How can you have privacy in house with all the other family members staying there. Walk around in a see through nighty in front of your husband and the rest of the family when you come out from the bath room. Tell his parents you would like to have some privacy in the living room with your husband, because you want to celebrate something.............
2007-09-17 19:00:33 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You can't change his mind. This is what he wants. You should have discussed all this a long time ago, like before you got married and started a family. You married the man as he is...
2007-09-17 19:09:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
obviously u re some indian or arabian origine. so this is in your colture - a father builds a huge house where everybody live after all together. don't pretend u didn't know that before. if u wanted to live separately u should have married a white man - they all prefer to live as far from parents as possible
2007-09-17 19:07:36 · answer #4 · answered by 111 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Umm.. it really shouldn't be that hard. What is insane is trying to have three different families under one roof. Write down a list of pros and cons and sit down with him and have a serious conversation with him. Also, make sure he realizes that this is important to you. I am sure that living with so many people takes a toll on your relationship with your husband, explain that to him.. make sure he knows exactly how much this affects you. Good Luck!
2007-09-17 19:04:56 · answer #5 · answered by Tina W 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
tell him the advantages of having your own home like youll be independent and you can do whatever you want.. it will be your own asset and investment, not part of the family. so pls tell him to try to think it over.
2007-09-17 19:18:10 · answer #6 · answered by brazenlove 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would just tell him how you feel about what going on. you have a right to have something that belong to you and your
family, he need to understand that. there nothing wrong with
investing, but your family need to have a place of your own
especally the boys.
2007-09-17 18:59:43 · answer #7 · answered by luckystar 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
kick out the in laws. tell them to find another place to live.
2007-09-17 18:59:02 · answer #8 · answered by vault 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
tell him no sex till u get a new house lol
2007-09-17 18:59:31 · answer #9 · answered by jonothon1234 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
"I am leaving ....are you coming......?"
2007-09-17 18:59:58 · answer #10 · answered by ajriggs26 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋