Why do people think we are not born gay?

Question

I find it intriguing from the straight person's point of view.

@Mr Jello: Why do you find it okay to act on feelings for the opposite sex and not the same sex then?

Answer 1

I really don't understand it, either.

I was born into a family of strong Christians. Growing up, anyone gay, was supposedly "less" than anyone else. If they did not love the oppositte sex, I was taught to believe that they were not worth my time, love, or care.

And over time, you know what I learned?

That's bullsh!t.

Unfortunately, the only two gay people I've ever met in person, have not been the best; I was 11 or 12 at the time. I'll not go into detail, but I found that I greatly disliked them--however, that was not because of their orientation, it was because of some things they took part in.

At that point, my parents further exclaimed their distaste for anyone gay. As far as they were concerned, I was supposed to shun such people.

That, too, was bullsh!t.

Now, I'm no longer letting my parents control my life, or my mind.

And quite frankly:

I am going to love whoever the f*ck I want, whenever the f*ck I want, whyever the f*ck I want, and I'll show that love however the f*ck I want. If you don't like that, f*ck you.


Also, I'd like to point out--straight men tend to treat me like an object. In person, I surround myself only with close friends, that do not judge me by my appearance. Online, however, where I can't really get away from them--I'm not saying it's true of all of them, but of the majority: I'm pretty; meant to be owned and used. On my online profiles, I receive ten or so messages a day, exclaiming everything from "you're hot!" to requests for sex. I find it insulting and degrading.

A gay man has never done that. Not once.

Ultimately, I've found them to be nicer, more intelligent, with less stereotypical views, and all in all, amazing people, than many straight men.

Bluntly: Gay people are who they are. You can't change that. Hell; neither can they. You may think they're fags. Well, as far as I'm concerned, they're FAGTASTIC.

[[No, I do not mean that insultingly. A close online friend, gay, said that being called fagtastic was the best thing anyone has ever said about his orientation, and it's true--he's amazing. If he's a fag, then he's sure as hell a fagtastic one.]]

Answer 2

Now I see "Yay It's Me" answer and that person brimming with passion shows what this question is about. It's not about sex although that is a likely outcome, it is a question of where does your passion lie.

When you are born, you are not born passionate about the opposite sex... or the same sex. You discover your passions as you grow, develop and work out what your emotions mean.

What sane, intelligent person would force someone to resist their passion for a same sex relationship? Only a bigot would.


{{{Yay it's me}}}

Answer 3

I think a small percentage MAY have a legitimate claim to the "born gay" theory; however, MOST do not! More likely, they were molested from such an early age they cannot remember ever NOT having same-sex "relations", and thus, come to the mistaken conclusion that they were "born that way". Compound this background with some very serious "issues" with members of the opposite sex, and the end result is a gay individual with all the justifications they need to convince others that it's "not their fault". Are we REALLY supposed to believe that gays have no free will of their own, as the rest of us do? That they have no control over their own actions, as the rest of us do? I just don't buy it. I think it's a cop-out! We ALL have choices.

Answer 4

You would think that straight people would see that 99.999% of LGBT people telling them that we can't "choose" to become sexually aroused by someone of a specific gender would be enough proof. Unfortunately, that apparently is not the case.

You can't point to orientation as a feature as you can point to someone's nose or ear, for example. And since the research into orientation is still fairly new from an historical standpoint, older notions about it still prevail.

It's not unlike people's attitudes toward disease prior to the invention of the microscope. Before the microscope, you couldn't see a germ. But people had to have some reason to explain sickness, so it was "the vapors," or a visitation from God for sinning. And the older notions took a while to die away, since you couldn't see bacteria. Eventually, of course, they did die away.

This will eventually happen when the mystery of orientation is explained. The silly notion of choosing it will die away. It can't happen soon enough.

Answer 5

I think this is one of the more interesting arguments to have with people. My step-sister is notoriously anti-gay and it drives me nuts! She's a "devout" Baptist and loves to push her beliefs on other people. We once had a conversation about homosexuality and I had so much fun pointing out the flaws in her argument. First, she said that homosexuality is a choice, that people decide they want to "stray from the Lord" and they do it just to be different. Then a few minutes later, she said that it's been proven that homosexuality is a disease, a mental disorder, much like schizophrenia or depression, and can be treated and cured if the person is willing.

My question to her was...How can something be both a choice AND a disease? You cannot CHOSE to get cancer, depression, diabetes, or any other disease. So, by her logic, it's got to be one or the other.

In my opinion, some people are just intolerant and ignorant. They decide that they aren't comfortable with something and will find any excuse to villify the other person. Seems completely un-"Christ-like" to me!

Answer 6

I'm straight, and I've often wondered the same thing. How can a straight person know how a gay person was born? A gay friend of mind says it this way: I live in the rural south, where being gay can get you beaten, or worse. Why the hell would I CHOOSE to be gay?

Sadly, people fear that which they don't understand.

.

Answer 7

Did I choose to be gay? No.
Can I remember a time when I was not gay? No.
Does that eliminate the possibility that environmental forces acted upon me early in life of which I was not conscious? No.

Answer 8

GOD!

I cant stand the people that try to put gays in with rapers and pedophiles!

use f.u.c.king statistics!


Im mainly talking about Anax or whatever his dumb name is.
being gay isnt just a "TODAY" thing....people didnt start coming out JUST because they could pawn off the responsibility.

What about Shakespeare's producer....he was gay....that was quite a while ago from today.

Do you think the guy that was soliciting gay sex acts in the airport bathroom CHOSE to be gay. NO!

What about the gays that try to turn themselves around? Why would they choose it to avoid it?

What about the gays that are ashamed of themselves because of people that think its wrong.

AND to that jello person.

GAY doesnt mean JUST having sex...its about what you think is attractive....what you admire. What you want in a RELATIONSHIP.

Answer 9

Really I don't think it matters whether you're born gay or not. If you do care about what two consenting adults get up to in the privacy of their own rooms, then seriously, mind your own f*cking business! It has NOTHING to do with you! Period.

Answer 10

Why do people believe straight people over the millions of LGBT individuals who claim otherwise? Who are the experts here?