hellppp pleasssee How can I get these guys to LEAVE me alone?

Question

ok i live in a mostly white neighborhood, and i go to this magnent school and theres these group of guys that wont leave me alone, at first they were being funny and cute and said things like "hot chocolate" or call me "beyonce" but now its gotten to the point where i dont feel comforatble, i want them to leave me alone but their all older than me and i'm just some freshman chick i just want them to back off, i told one of them once to stop calling me stuff that my name is candice and he just laughed.
and once i was walking down the hall to class and one of them grabbed by butt and then i looked back he acted like it wasnt him and he didnt see nothin and once at lunch the same guy threw a french fry at me
hellllppp please, i dread going to school now
and dont tell me to tell the teacher or my parents that would be embarassing and they would think i was a slut or something,
shoudl i just try avoiding them in the halls

Answer 1

I can understand how you feel. I was very quiet in school, not a nerd, but to myself and people thought I was a snob. That was the stupidest assumption I have EVER heard. But anyhow, in answer to your question, I would say the best thing to do is not be rude or nasty to them. You could try avoiding them, but that will work for so long. If someone were to put their hands on you inappropriately, I would tell them that is not welcomed and do it again you'll see what happens.
I tell my daughter that if she ever had a problem like this, not to be nasty or rude, to smile and just keep walking. I would say that when you give them negative attention, they will feed off that and will keep doing what they are doing. If you ignore it, it may go on for a little bit and will eventually stop. If you acknowledge it, you are giving them the sense of ok now you got my attention, I am willing to be civil and nice to you, but don't take my kindness for weakness. Noone said that you have to be friends with them. Smile and keep walking. If they touch you again, be firm, but nice "I told you not to touch me" and go tell the principal or teacher.

Answer 2

Ugh, I remember that stuff happening to me at your age. Dreadful behavior, really.

I do think the best thing is to tell a trusted teacher AND your parents. The behavior of these boys has nothing to do with you, it's them. Adults should know this, that it's nothing you're doing. This is how teenage boys often are. It's unacceptable. They need to learn to control themselves. I never said anything either... I didn't want to seem weak. Now I rather wish I had.

I recommend not walking around alone if you can help it. Maybe it won't prevent all this but there's some safety and comfort in numbers. Make some new friends.

Ignore them when they call you something other than your name, and just try to be above it all. That's really all you can do until the dorks grow up. IF they grow up. Some guys think this behavior is cool well into adulthood, because no one bothers to teach them otherwise.

Answer 3

You don't say where this neighborhood is, but my recommendation is that you report them, and not to school officials....the primary purpose of educational administrators is to keep the school system out of the newspaper and courtroom. This is a law enforcement problem, and my first stop would be my parents....then, I would talk with the District Attorney's office, victim advocate. Believe it or not, this is a crime, and you are a crime victim. Once a person touches another person without their permission, especially after being asked to stop, that is a crime. And, the nature of sex offenders is that they don't stop until they get what they want. This is because sex crimes are NOT about sex. They are about control. You have to show them NOW that you don't intend to give in to them, and then call down heat on them if they don't stop. If you do anything less than this, you're going to put yourself on a criminal justice merry go round that you won't be easily able to get off.

Good Luck.

Answer 4

Not wanting to tell you parents or a teacher shows you have no respect for yourself. These guys are being disrespectful, telling someone is the only way they'll stop. It's stupid to worry about being embarrassed over something this serious. This can be considered sexual harassment. Open your eyes sweetie and do the right thng don't let them keep degrading you.

Answer 5

How do you get these guys to leave you alone? Well you have to be proactive - you can't just try to avoid them, they will then make sure that THEY find YOU. You have become a soft target for them. What they are doing is called harassment and it IS ILLEGAL.
Forget about your embarrassment, that isn't relevant - it's not YOU doing the wrong thing, it's them. March straight to the Headmaster's door and tell him what is happening.
If you don't put a stop to it now, it will only become worse.
Best of luck to you.

Answer 6

I can understand not telling anyone, but what I would do, is tell them off. Don't start hardcore on them at first, but if after a warning they continue, go hardcore on their asses. Seriously. I know it may sound terrifying, but be firm and strong, and don't back down. Bring a close friend with you if you wish (don't deliberatly walk up to them, but bring your friend with you when you usually see them). I went through the same thing (I'm half black half white, and I'm got curves), and my best friend was with me during one of the encounters, and she got angry at them, which gave me back bone, and I was able to tell them off. And they never bugged me again, and no one knew about it. Also, remove their hand from you and while you do, dig your nails in. They did not enjoy it at all when i did that.

Hope everything works out for you :)

Answer 7

alll you can to do is report it. They have to be penalized for this behavior. It's wrong. They are doing this in high school, what will they do when they are out of high school? Will they rape some girl, b/c they think they are better than she is?
They are taunting you, b/c they think they make you put up with it. they know you can't fight them alone and win. Talk to your guidance counselor. See what he/she says. That's sexual harrassment and sexual assaut. ) assault is merely any touching at all, but this is more intimate.
If you didn't encourage this, and it does happen without encouragement, you have to stand up for yourself. You have to tell someone. tell your parents. You're not a slut, b/c they want to touch you. They are sick.

Answer 8

I would look them straight in the eye and say in a proud, firm voice, "HEY! What would you think if someone said that (or did that, or whatever) to your MOM???!!" Practice it in the mirror a few times so you can do it confidently. It worked for me! Beyond that, unfortunately, all I can say is to avoid them and know that they are immature, racist little a**holes, who will grow up to become immature, racist grown men, and they will work their minimum-wage manual labor jobs for the rest of their lives, while you go off to college and meet wonderful people and establish yourself in a rewarding career where you make tons of money and work for the common good. Best of luck to you!!

Answer 9

You don't want to hear this, but I'm going to tell you anyway. REPORT THEM to the principal. Once you report it and they do nothing to stop them from harassing you, you can sue them. If they ever do anything worse than grab your butt all the school will say is that you never said anything, so REPORT THEM!

Answer 10

You need to report them to your school principal or better yet, the police. You do not let anyone touch you like that ever! Those boys are awful little jerks and they're just trying to get sex or something like that from you!

Report them!