I made the decision to divorce my wife several year ago. I have not done it yet becasue I am afraid that she will mistreat my children when she shares custody. I have a 8 year old daughter and a 14 year old son. My wife is angry all the time and yells at both of them. She has hit them in the past but does not do that anymore since I threatoned to report to the authorities. There is a whole bunch of other things that support that my kids and I will be better off without her in the picture. That decision is made so I do not need advise on counseling etc.
What I need to know is this:
If I filed for a divorce and asked for full custody of both my children, will the fact that my 14 year old son expresses desire to live with me 100% of the time help me get full custody of my daughter if she also expresses her desire to live with me 100% of the time? I have heard that the courts do not like to split siblings.
2007-09-17 09:16:12 · 10 answers · asked by fijian 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you are right, the court likes to see siblings stay together, so you would have a better chance of getting full custody of both of them. What I would be doing, however, is keeping a diary from here on in and write down the dates and times your wife is yelling at your kids....what she says, how she said it etc. Also make a few notes of incidents in the past when she hit them. Keep records of what your kids tell you about their mother when you are not there....put everything down in writing as it will go well for you in court.....it also takes away the guesswork because we do forget sometimes and the Judge will ask you why you think you should get custody of your children. With a diary it will make it easier for you. I wish you luck.
2007-09-17 09:24:33 · answer #1 · answered by rightio 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If your 14 yr old son wants to live with you then the courts will allow him too. Your eight year old daughter will probally have to talk to a "guardian ad litem" or someone similiar to express her wishes on where she would like to live.
It really depends on the judge you are dealing with and how good of a lawyer you have. Some judges use the magic age of "12" as the age where the child can decide where they want to live. Your wife's desire for custody will also play a huge role in the judges decision. Many judges will split up the siblings just to be fair to each parent.
"There is a whole bunch of other things that support that my kids and I will be better off without her in the picture." Children need BOTH of their parents. She may be a little tweeked but she is still and always will be their mother.
Does your wife know that you plan on divorcing her? Is this why she is angry? Counseling for both of you may help the situation whethere you get divorced or not. She would also benefit from parenting classes.
2007-09-17 09:36:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not an attorney nor am I a judge but I will tell you this, The judge will make his or her decision based on the Best Interests of the child. with what you have said here, I think you will get custody of both children but you should still consult a reputable attorney who may hire a consultant to investigate both of you to determine who is best to care for your children. It is the children that deserve the best treatment and all I can say is good luck
2007-09-17 09:28:05 · answer #3 · answered by ken j 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i believe you right about not splitting up siblings. but then again, you're dealing with lawyers here. if her's is nasty, the children's desire may not make a difference. my brother went through a very similar ordeal. she got custody.
2007-09-17 09:21:17 · answer #4 · answered by andy h. 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They have to talk to both the kids first and see how they feel and if they both seem unhappy with her and she has mistreated them you got them both, but it would help if she was proven to be an unfit parent and sounds like she is.
2007-09-17 09:25:44 · answer #5 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe the children are old enough to make there own decision as far as where they would like to live. these day's the judge would rather here from the children rather then the feuding spouse's.
2007-09-17 09:26:58 · answer #6 · answered by diablo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell the court of the abuse. She is guilty of it and deserves to lose her parental rights. If you don't mention it up front, it will look like you are not concerned about the child abuse.
2007-09-17 09:55:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a lawyer and ask him. Anyone who isn't a lawyer who specializes in custody cases can't answer this one.
2007-09-17 09:21:13 · answer #8 · answered by Greenman 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should take them both and tell the judge that stupid ***** beats them!
2007-09-17 09:19:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
yep
2007-09-17 09:22:24 · answer #10 · answered by Latin Lover 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋