i have been seeing someone since february and he still won't tell his dad about me. what should i do?

Question

in february i started seeing this guy he is and has been a really good friend of mine for almost 20 years. the thing is he is going through his second divorce and doesn't want to tell his dad who is 76 years old that he is getting another divorce or anything about me. i am apart of his life in every other way but he won't let me into that part of his life. we live together and all 3 off his kids love me, i don't know what to do. i really want his dad to know about me and the divorce. what should i do?

his marriage broke up right before thanksgiving of 2006 and i didn't start seeing him until february 2007. his wife cheated on him and then left him for the person she cheated with.

Answer 1

He knows his father, and he's an older gentleman.
Maybe he knows his father will be upset, and think you're the cause of his second divorce.
He doesn't want to upset his elderly Dad, and he doesn't want to make YOU look like the "other woman" if you're not.
I think you should just back off a little and let him do it in his own time. OR...sit him down, and have a talk about why he hasn't, so you can better understand his delimma.

Answer 2

Nothing, it has nothing to do with you or your relationship with him.

I was with my husband for 2 yrs and we had been friends for over 20 and he never wanted to talk about his father and it was his father not mine. He found out about me and our son the day our son was born. Peter left a message on his machine to announce that his son was born.

I have since learned from Peter that his Dad just left and went from being a great father to not being there at all. Peter at 45 hasn't accepted that it was more his mothers fault than his fathers but Peter doesn't stand in the way of his Dad wanting to know his grandson.

Live your life to the fullest and as long as you aren't left out of anything leave it alone. He has to handle these things himself or with your help if he asks for it.

Good luck!