a question arose during a get together of how soon is too soon after one loses a spouse to death. Some say a year, some say 6 mths, some say when the person feels that it is ok.
2007-09-17 07:37:01 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The time is right when ever you have put it behind you.If you have lingering issues then it will only hurt you trying to date again.If kids are involved you may have to wait until they are comfortable with it also.
2007-09-17 07:52:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone will say, "When you feel ready" and "It's just up to you", but I can tell you from experience, I have known of several men who lost their wives and they think they feel ready to date rather soon afterwards, but the relationships are uncommonly disasterous. They want to replace their wife, and that cannot happen. They have to mourn the loss of their wife, get over their wife, and then look for someone who they can accept as being different in every way from their wife. Men always want to rush things until it gets serious, then they back peddle right out of things and end up hurting a lot of good women. I say, wait till you've mourned, and make that mourning at least a year. Don't expect a replacement! You'll never find her. Be willing to accept someone new and different.
2007-09-17 07:46:28 · answer #2 · answered by Aiden 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you have respected your mate of what amount of years that you were together, then you can feel confident that "dating" is your prerogative. Don't let anyone interfere with you and your choices. Hurtful things like, I bet you knew the other person already. Yes, you might have and so what. Why didn't you wait longer? This is simply no one's business. I don't care who the interfering, meddling person is. I am talking about other relatives and "so-called well wishers." You simply don't need that type of advice. The Lord daily loadeth us with BENEFITS, even the God of our salvation. Selah. - Psalm 68:19. What shall we then say to these things? If GOD be for us, who can be against us? - Psalms 68:19. Read Psalm 35 to (Plead My Cause) and ask God to take care of that which is "known" and that which is "unknown." BEFORE you enter any home or building, say quietly "Peace Be To This House." - Luke 10:5. This would make the atmosphere within those premises more peaceful for all involved. This would be to your credit. I wish you well. Peace, Love and God Bless.
2007-09-17 07:58:26 · answer #3 · answered by In God We Trust 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's different for everyone. Only you can decide what right for you. Some people can move on quickly because they know that their loved one would want them to be happy and get the most out of life. Then on the other hand there people like my mom who still aren't ready after 8 years. It's a personal choice.
2007-09-17 07:46:50 · answer #4 · answered by tjmoore83102 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone is different and for specific reasons. Six months is standard but most people wait for a year to put the feelings with the deceased spouse to rest. Basically, it is an individuals choice when they are ready to go out and enjoy themselves again. There is no set rule.
2007-09-17 07:44:14 · answer #5 · answered by jodie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is up to the person. Some people that lost their spouse where not in good marriages, so do not miss them, like some that had a good one. I havn't dated at all, and don't care if I do. I guess I havn't meet the right one yet. Some people need to have that extra company, so date right away.
2007-09-17 07:45:37 · answer #6 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you feel its right- but if children are involved have the keep it a secret- no one really knows if anyone is the right one for at least a year anyhow. It isn't right to have another person in their face too soon. With kids it is so much different huh...
2007-09-21 07:31:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it took me a year before I was ready, but the guy I'm
dating now started dating 5 months after his wife died.
Our circumstances were different, my husband died suddenly
with no warning, of a heart attack. His wife had cancer and
was sick for 7 months, so he had time to wrap his brain around the idea that she wasn't going to make it. My general
feeling is that men start sooner than women. Just whenever
you're ready, it's the right time.
2007-09-17 07:45:24 · answer #8 · answered by doodlebug 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well i will give my advice through experiance...my best friends husband died in iraq and i think after a year is good to start dating again i think if anyone started dating before a year i would look down on them. i just figure if your really in love and loose your loved one to death dating should be the last thing on you mind. if my best friend started dating 6 months from now i wouldnt be to supportive
2007-09-17 07:45:36 · answer #9 · answered by lovely 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When youre ready. But try to have some respect for your spouces family and friends as well as your dead spouce and wait at least 6 months. You dont have to, but its the appropriate thing to do
2007-09-17 08:04:02 · answer #10 · answered by Vegas Mike 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋