Getting married .. PLZ HELP i need advice from ur experience?

Question

I need any kind of serious marriage advice from men and women considering any marriage issue

I'M REALLY SCARED AND SO WORRIED
i cant get enough advice and i have ZERO experience in realationships

Thanks in advance ^__^

Answer 1

You will have a good chance of having a great marriage if you and your husband to be have good communication and trust together.

Answer 2

Though getting married is a serious thing and can be a little weir I am not sure why you are so scared and worried. Perhaps you’re not quite ready to get married and you should continue with an engagement for a while till you are more comfortable. I have been married for over 9 yrs and when I got married I was ready without a doubt. With that said I will give you a few things to remember. A quote I like is "how can we be lovers if we can't be friends". Friends do not just mean you like the same things though that is important however that’s not all what it means to be friends. You need to be able to communicate, trust, love and respect each other or you won't be able to maintain a healthy marriage. It’s important that you keep a dialog going and make sure you’re either on the same page or at least in the same chapter of the same book. Also something really important is romance and sex. Though many may dismiss this I believe it to be a vital part of your marriage. This is a big reason that alot of marriages fail because your not sexually compatible. Now if one likes it every week and the other prefers every day obviously that’s not what I mean. But if one wants to have sex like once every week or so and the other once every month or other month then that’s going to be difficult. Also if you can't fulfill each others sexual needs then that can be very hard to maintain a healthy sexual relationship. And last I suggest to you two things. Never go to bed mad. Try to always settle disagreements first. And don't give up so easily. So many couples have one fight and then say I am getting a divorce or they say my spouse won't let me do this so I am getting divorced. Always remember that divorce should never be considered as a first or second choice. It should be the last choice if all else fails. I wish you good luck and I hope you have a great wedding and a life time of happiness. God Bless.

Answer 3

ah... I posted a question of this sort the other day... let me find the answer I gave to it also... I will add to this in a minute =)

May I offer some advice to single people looking to marry?
They say most married couples fight about money, kids and sex. So, here is some advice. Be sure you know the man you are going to marry. You need to have basically the same principles, morals, values and standards. If you don't, you will have problems. Be sure you agree about alcohol, porn, discipline of children, money and sex. These things need to be discussed. Good Luck! =) Love is a choice, and marraige vows are sacred. Take a look at the vows and discuss what they mean to you with your significant other so you know for sure that you agree and really know who you are marrying! After having 30 or so boyfriends before my husband came along, I think I should know a few things and I think I should pass that info on =)

Final thought...even though I have only been married 1 year just about, I have learned from many who have been married 10, 20, 30 and 40 plus years! =) and I have learned from the mistakes of those who have divorced.

Answer 4

we only fear what we dont understand you are scared of marriage cause you have never been married. Most people are scared because its a lot harder to break up with a husband then a boyfriend. If your worried the only thing i can tell you to do is this. Sit down in a corner and breath and for 30 minutes non-stop think about what you see with this man in the next 5 years if you like what you see and believe in what you see then go on and get married you silly kids. if you dont like it and dont think it can work break it off or at least slow down the pace of the realtionship. I mean look at romeo and juliet they knew each other for 3 days had sex the 2nd day got married the 1st day and died on the 3rd. Lets hope that wont happen to you K?-Z.williams

Answer 5

honey, i think you need to have some experience i relationships before you get married. however , marriage is a 2 way street give and take, make sure you put into it what you want out of it and make sure he is willing to do the same. remember this that marriage is not always going to be a beautiful rose garden some times its gonna be a sticker patch and how you work through those stickers will make or break a relationship. i think , when people come through the sticker patch togather thier relationship is stronger because they learn to lean on each other. i wish you the happiest marriage. i have been married for almost 30 years and have had lots of ups and downs and my marriage is still good.

Answer 6

It sounds like you are having serious doubts about your upcoming marriage. This is normal but I hope to give you some things to think about. I hope this helps.

Both parties should have very similar goals, deams, and how to achieve them. If not, someone or both parties will be having to compromise continuously to come to an agreement. Prime example, if one party wants to save most of the money and the other wants to spent most of the money, honey, there will always be friction there enough so that it can keep the parties apart on other similar issues. If you find you are not compatible on money matters, you and he really need to face the reality and seriousness of it and have a very serious discussion about it. If money is the issue and you want to work things out, I'd suggest a family budget and how, who is going to fund the expenses. I cannot stress how important it is to discuss marriage goals and how to reach them. You may want to take the scenic route, but he may want to take the more direct route to reach a goal. If both of you are very determined to have it your own way, don't be too surprised when conflicts arise. It is my advice to marry someone who is natured like oneself. If you don't marry that type of person, you each may feel like you are walking on opposite sides of the Grand Canyon. Money matters are just one of many issues that can divide the two of you. Being very different from one another can very well split the atom.

I hope for the very best for you whomever you may marry. I wouldn't be in any hurry. Better late than sorry. You may very well save yourself a lot of grief and frustration.

Answer 7

I think the one thing I was not prepared for when I got married was that it was not the hearts and flowers I was expecting. i thought it would be plain sailing and uncomplicated, but even only after 3 years i find it such hard work and I feel so let down in what i built up in my head my perfect marraige would be. Dont expect too much, and TALK TALk TAlK about everything. Make sure you both have the same goals and dreams in life. I thought we did, and I got it really wrong.

Answer 8

You and your spouse have to have the fortitude, love and strength to work through the hard times, which will be plentiful, and the wisdom to cherish and enjoy the good times so they get you through the tough times! Do not be too stubborn to say you are sorry when you know you're wrong, and when you do fight, fight fairly by not bringing up old resolved fights, no name calling and try to make your statements carefully because once you've put the hurtful words out there, you can't take them back!

Answer 9

You need to absolutety certain, because divorce should never be an option or an easy way out like liberals believe.

Also, you are electing a man to be a leader, so a woman has to be very careful - you don't want someone like Clinton.

It sounds as though you may not be ready.

Answer 10

I got married in May and the most important piece of advice I was given was that, in planning your wedding day, there is no way you will ever make all the players in the game happy. Focus on your own vision and what will make that day special for you and your husband-to-be.