How am I going to put up with my family??

Question

I know I may sound like a spoiled brat, but it's my Grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary coming up and I really don't want to go.

My Grandparents fight all the time. My Auntie is a completely different person when she's around the other members of my family, everyone argues and yells.

My grandma favours my other cousins. My cousin who is 18 is rude, ungrateful and does drugs (which is completely against my families morals) and my grandma is changing all the plans to suit my cousin because she just injured her back.

I was in a car crash, which was my Grandma's fault and I injured my back and neck and I've had to give up everything I enjoy, yet my Grandma has never said sorry or anything.

I hate my family and now I have to spend 5 days with them, probably without cellphone reception so I wont be able to talk to my best friend/boyfriend.

Do you think I'm wasting my time arguing with Mum to let me stay home? Or should I just go?

I'm going to be the worst company if I'm made to go

My boyfriend cant go. If I go, I'll just be called the ungrateful one for not enjoying myself and ruining the anniversary anyway

I'm 17. I don't think those excuses would work.

Answer 1

hry gurl you really do have a hard life and I feel sorrt for you in this case I would not go doesnt matter wot, if its going to make you this unhappy just say if you want me to go you have to drag me there.It will upset them but thats better than you having to put up with all that fighting aye

Answer 2

Honey go to this party and when the fighting starts open your mouth and put your foot down. Tell everyone how you feel about all the fighting in your family. If you hurt their feelings or ruin the party oh well the fighting is causing way more probs. Some will say you are just throwing a fit because you didn't want to come in the first place, but it may just wake your family up to the hurt they a causing. I have always been the ungrateful grand child to my mom's dad but you know it's only because I open my mouth, and don't hide my feelings.

Answer 3

I say go and I have been under similar situations as my family appears just as warped as yours, but in a different way.
your almost a adult and this will be a time you will always remember, like an inprint on the brain!
you can just sit back and watch and say to yourself "thank goodness I have the ability to see thru this crap and not be like these warped people!" that is what i and my daughters do and in the later months and years as you are reminissing about those times you will have a great laugh over it.
trust me, its best to put yourself in ALL sorts of situations as a youngun cause that is what will make you able to se others and other situations better as you grow into OLD-hood.
hope this helps and I regret that I myself Opted out of these things now that im older (41) and the whole family has aged and they talk about "remeber when old uncle..so and so..did this and auntie thsi or grandma that did this..." i dont have the memories so i can only liston and not partake.
so GO AND BE ONE THAT SPEAKS UP AND HAVE FUN DISPITE ALL AND LEAVE WITH WARPED YET FUN TAILS TO TELL WHEN YOU HIT YOUR 20'S 30'S AND 40'S OR BEYOND!
as if you you knwo anyone from those ages and realaly sit and liston them it is WHAT WE ALL DO, ITS PART OF LIFE!
GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN!

Answer 4

How old are you? I think if you're 16+ and can be trusted to be well behaved while your parents are gone, they should let you stay home or with a friend...
Under 16 you should probably go... Your too young to stay alone...
If your mom is worried what to tell the family for why you arent there, she could say you had an important meeting, or you had to work, or your friend and you had plans to do something that weekend for ever and you couldnt back down.... Theres lots of excuses she can use without being embarassed...

Answer 5

Good night Wabby.

After having completely responded to your question about your mother who fails to listen to you whenever you require her attention and realized I wasn't so helpful, I have decided to respond to this question in the same manner I previously provided.

It's your Grandparents 50th anniversary, which should be memorable and collectable. Although your Grandparents favor other Grand-children, that shouldn't prevent you from being a participant or a guest at their 50th anniversary.

Grandparents are respected people. They're the ones your parents came out of. They're growth of the plant you are from, and you should show respect in favor of their values, contribution, and simply for being your Grandparents.

Of course you may predict dissatisfaction at their 50th anniversary, but I do not think such dissatfaction will harm you in any circumstances.

I am sorry for the inconvenience this has causes you, but I also realize you are trying to come up with excuses for not wanting to go to your Grand-parents 50th anniversary by splotting out how your Grandmother was at fault in an accident that you were also in and failed to offer an apology to you. I do not think I would tell my child, or my grandchild, that I am sorry for causing a car accident, but rather thank God that we're saved during such accident.

Wabby, Dad knows you do not want to go. I would never conclude to say you are a brat, but I'd safely say you need to invite yourself in the adult world and learn to sacrifice for essential reasons.

Also, do what I told you to do regarding your mother's issue. That's what I did and that was how she happened to give me full attention. She realized how hurt she was when I ignored her, and she compared her bad feelings with mine to realize I was also hurt as much as she was. At least she tasted the bitterness that she used to offer me.

Dad.

Answer 6

Trust me when I say that the best thing to do is to go to this anniversary party. If you don't go you'll just be giving your grandma even more ammo to use against you. Forever more you'll be labled as the ungrateful and spoiled grandchild who ruined her party. Your parents will probably also be in for some abuse if you don't go. My advice is to just suck it up and go. Save yourself and your loved ones loads of drama. To make it more enjoyable for you maybe your boyfriend or best friend could come along for moral support.

There are going to be lots and lots of events like this to deal with in the future. Most people have family members that they can't stand. In most cases it's best to just go with the flow to save yourself additional stress.

Take care and good luck.

Answer 7

Wabby all I can suggest is to grin and bare it. Years ago we had a family reunion up North and I didn't really want to go.
I did go and whilst there was a little arguing over all we had a good time so it was well worth it.
The occasion was my fathers 70 th birthday and I didn't particularly like him, but several months later he died which made me glad I had gone.
Mum later told us Dad had raged about the gathering as it was being organised, but then raved about how good it had been for the rest of his life.

Answer 8

Make yourself a large omelet out of egg ,onions and garlick the night before.
you will fart and stink worse than a pig!
Nobody will want to have you in the car or on a party.
Act as if you didn´t know...
Or just go and say something has got into your throat - stick a finger into your throat and vomit all over the table...then tell them you feel bad and have to lay down until the party is over.
Or just don´t go!They can make your life miserable for it (but not MUCH longer)
May be you inherit less,when they pass away,but do you really need and care for this families money so much?

Answer 9

It's time you pick up a new habit: Ignoring people.

I know how you feel, I have been thru similar things with my family. The thing is, you have to forgive your family. Your grandmother included. Just be nice to them anyway. If you are rude back or argue with them it will be harder on you, that's all you will be doing. Don't make a fuss over it and just go on about yourself like you don't give a...

It's only 5 days. Not as good as 5 hours, but not as bad as 5 weeks. You can make it, it won't be that bad. Look at it this way, at least you will have something to look forward to: when its over.

Answer 10

Suck it up! Go to the party. Being married is a big deal. The world does not revolve around you there are others on the planet so you better get used to it. How was the crash your grandmother's fault did she deliberately drive your side on the car into to cause the accident. You don't know what happened, just that she was driving. GROW UP!

Answer 11

life is to short to be mad at anyone my sister was killed at 18 and i lost my dad grandma and grandpa shortly after that just from stress cancer and old age anything could happen to anyone just be happy you survived the wreck it may be gods way of awakening you to see 5 days wont be bad its only 5 days i was like that with my family to im 18 nw and i live with my bf i miss spending time with my family your bf shouldnt be your top priority it should be your family theyve been there for you giving you food etc and hink of what your mom went through to givebirth to you she gave up stuff she might of wanted just for you thats 18 yrs worth of stuff she cant do same with your grandma for your mom if it wasnt for her you wouldnt be there 18 yrs compared to 5 days isnt nothing im sure if you talked to the people arguing let them know how you felt theyd listen