How do you get love and respect back into the relationship once it's gone? Or is it impossible?

Question

I've been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. I feel like we DID have alot of potential and love for one another. We also both were mature and had a good head on our shoulders. Well, his ex-g/f tried to break us up, and it's ruined our relationship, I've let my insecurities ruin our relationship. I made too big a deal out of it. Now trust isn't there, we're both more paranoid, even though we're entirely open with each other. The big one is, respect is gone. We used to highly respect each other, and now the things we say to each other now I could've never imagined EVER wanting to say that to each other. I used to feel like he was head over heels for me, but now it's so different. We used to have ALOT of fun together and brought out the best in one another, and now I feel like we just argue alot more, and don't really do anything. All we do is sit around and watch TV. I felt that our relationship had so much potential, but jealousy & immaturity has gotten the best of it. How do I fix it?

Additional Details

11 minutes ago
I know we still do have love for each other, but we've both become selfish and mean to each other. And I KNOW it's because I let jealousy into the relationship, it used to be an amazing relationship, but now we're very disrespectful towards each other. The ex g/f thing happened a year ago and I still get mad about it. How do I get our old relationship back, or is it doomed now? I KNOW we had alot of potential, but I think we're both turning into really selfish/bitter people because of our relationship.

Answer 1

If Love & Respect are, "Gone" ....... they were never there in the first place, else whatever precipitated the Loss would never have happened ... What you had was, Chemistry, that worked for you and felt good like it was supposed to, and so you rationalized it into what you thought you wanted it to be, for a myriad of reasons that would take more room than is available here to answer and explain, and you called it, Love ... which in itself is a misnomer ........ In short, you can't go back ....... move on and try and seperate in a friendly way (Now THAT, is what is impossible)

Answer 2

A great way to get your ex back is https://tr.im/IdsI5

They might realize they need you and come crawling back!

If you do get back together, don't let the same issues that destroyed your relationship crop up again. Have a good, long talk about how you're both going to make it right this time.

Answer 3

Your goal isn’t to have “one more night” with your ex, or to trick your
ex into getting back with you only to have the whole thing blow up in
your face again because nothing has changed and you still have the
same problems and arguments as before. Your goal is to slowly wear
away the reasons you and your ex broke up, address the objections he
or she may have to getting back together with you, remind them of the
profound attraction that brought you together in the first place, and
forge a powerful new base for your relationship . . . all at the push of a
few buttons. It takes some time, but the results are VERY worth it.

Go to : https://shortly.im/lYdPD

Answer 4

You cannot go back dear try as you might you never can do it. You might get back together with this young man at some point, you might not ever again but either way you will not "get back" what you had before, that came before this happended. You might get over it you might even patch things up, but this HAS happened and it has changed everything. Nothing ever goes back the way it was once it changes. That is one of the sadder facts of life.

Answer 5

Your messages definitely helped me through my breakup. About a year and a half ago my lover of four years and I broke up and I desperately wanted ex back, and because of some of the advice you had given, I was able to! Time went on and things were back to the way they were, and were not together anymore, and it’s okay. I wouldn’t have been able to go through the realization process had I not read these, as well. Your messages were very beneficial to me, though I don’t need them anymore, they were always appreciated. Thank you so much.

Answer 6

i don't think you can fix your situation. even if you did, it would never be the same. it's just impossible to turn things the way they used to. people change, time flies by. and we are not the person we once were. good luck

Answer 7

"Not to forgive is to be imprisoned by the past, by old grievances that do not permit
life to proceed with new business. Not to forgive is to yield oneself to another's
control... to be locked into a sequence of act and response, of outrage and revenge,
tit for tat, escalating always. The present is endlessly overwhelmed and devoured
by the past. Forgiveness frees the forgiver. It extracts the forgiver from someone
else's nightmare.": - Lance Morrow

"Tolerance implies a respect for another person, not because he is wrong or even
because he is right, but because he is human." - John Cogley Source: Commonwealth,
24 April 1959

"To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used
to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek
joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what
is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power.
Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never,
to forget. " - Arundhati Roy

Since when have we lived without faith, when we lived without hope, never. (me)

The Will is positive, the Judgment is negative.

Answer 8

For the best answers, search on this site https://smarturl.im/aD1Pi

Love is not an emotion because............ Respect is commanded or demanded. Admiration is won sometimes against the will. It is impossible to admire someone we dislike. Loyalty and trust we entice or win from others. A sense of awe or adoration for God descends upon us from realisation. Certainly all these emotions may be present in love but they are not love itself. Love is freely given. It is a matter of choice. Love is wanting what is best for the other person, even if what is best for them is not going to suit the lover. Love is totally selfless and it is an act, not an emotion. We often mistake it for emotion because it is usually contained in strong emotions. But love is not an emotion…. love is creative action. It is the most creative act in the universe” Contrary to popular opinion, love is not accidental, incidental, or happenstance. It isn't random, arbitrary, or evolutionary. It happens by the sheer force of two independent wills focused in the same direction. It happens because the two people involved wanted it to happen, and have usually expended considerable effort to make sure that it did happen. Love is not a hole in the sidewalk waiting for you to blindly fall into it. Love is the by product of mental and physical time and effort deliberately put forth to create and continue feelings of infatuation and romance. We've all seen the situations where people have gotten involved in emotional and/or physical intimacies with someone they were "just friends" with. The usual protests go something like "I don't know how it happened", "I never intended for it to happen", or "I couldn't help myself". The facts are that these relationships never just happen. They occur after days, weeks, and months of finding big and small ways to perpetuate the ectasy of illicit attraction. That fact alone begs the question, is it really love you've created? You might think it is. Your partner may even agree. The truth is you've created a fantasy that can only survive in the bubble of the manipulated realities you've invented. That's why the magic dies under the stresses and strains of real life. No longer able to shield your "love" from the side effects and consequences of real life, you usually soon find that your "love" fades. In short, true love is a series of choices that you get emotional about. It is not merely an emotion or a feeling that you just helplessly fall into like a hole in the sidewalk. True love is deliberate. It lasts, not because of how you feel about eachother - but because of your dedication to your commitment to eachother. Categories create order, and keep things in perspective. However, there are certain false generalizations which lead many to confusion and pain. Defining love simply as an emotion is one of these such errors. We live on our emotions, and are driven by the impulses we feel. Anger, pain, affection, and other feelings seem to function as our instincts. We can learn to control or suppress them, but they are always present. Love has never been something as fickle as a passing feeling. If you truly love someone, you are driven to sacrifice for this person, sometimes at your own loss, and do many things which go against your instinctive emotions. Sometimes, love must endure pain and hatred to complete itself. There is no object of jealousy or grief beyond itself. Love is, at once, the ultimate realization and subsequent death of all emotions. It strives to unite our humanity with something higher. We tell ourselves we are less than what we are in an effort to become satisfied with mere emotions. And we do fool ourselves, trading one emotion with another until we grow too tired of temporal satisfaction. Love is satisfied with itself, though.

Answer 9

If there's anything that hurts more than getting dumped, it's the feeling of total detachment or disinterest from your ex boyfriend or girlfriend. One minute you're dating and seeing each other every day, and the next minute your ex seems cold, distant, and totally uninterested in hearing from you. So what gives?

What goes on in your ex's mind after they break up with you?

Before you can go about getting your ex back, you need to understand the basics of breakup mechanics. This means you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and start looking at things from your ex's perspective, with a level head and a clear mind. Right now, things aren't exactly as they seem. Although your ex can seem wholly uninterested in contact right now, it certainly doesn't mean that he or she doesn't still have feelings for you.

Breaking up is tough on the both of you. Your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend might seem carefree and callous right now, but this is usually a wall put forth to cover some very deep-seeded emotions. The bonds you formed while dating didn't happen overnight... they took months or even years to develop. By the same token, your ex's feelings for you aren't going to disappear at the drop of a hat, despite what it may outwardly look like at the moment.

To sum it up? Your ex still has feelings for you after the breakup. But the easiest way to keep the breakup going is for them to bury or ignore these feelings, and to detach from you as quickly and completely as possible. This is why your ex won't return your phone calls, answer your emails, or otherwise engage you in any form of contact right now. At the moment, they're too busy trying to keep you at arm's length so they can fully process the breakup.

Getting Your Ex To Want You Back - First Moves

An important thing most people don't realize is that getting back together is a two-way street. It's not enough to want your boyfriend or girlfriend back with every part of your heart and soul... you need to make your ex want YOU as well. Until that happens, reversing your breakup just won't be possible. Focusing on what your ex wants is a lot more important than focusing only on what you're trying to achieve.

To make your ex want you, the first thing you need to do is withdraw. The reason for this is simple: your ex needs to miss you before they can start wanting you back. Ever since the breakup, there's already a void in your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend's life where you used to be. There are things you used to do, places you used to go, and daily routines that no longer exist since he or she broke up with you.

Playing upon that, you can get your ex to miss you very quickly, even when they don't seem interested. The only problem with this is you can screw it up very easily through unwanted contact. Calling, texting, emailing, or even showing up to see your ex boyfriend or girlfriend are all counterproductive to the process of getting them back. Your ex won't ever start missing you if you're still always around, which is why going away and becoming a complete mystery to them is so important right now.

Essentially, you want your ex to think that you've moved on without them, as if the breakup hasn't affected you one bit. You want your ex worried about losing you, both as a friend or a potential fallback just in case they made a mistake by breaking things off. The less your ex knows about your post-breakup life, the more they'll be interested in hearing from you again. And the longer you can go without making any form of contact, the more you're piquing your ex boyfriend or girlfriend's interest.

Other ways to get your ex to call you

Making your ex come back to you is far, far better than running back to them. The less needy and desperate you seem, the greater your chances for successfully fixing your breakup. And best of all? When your ex comes looking for you, the new relationship you forge will be ten times stronger than if you were the one who chased after them. This is why it's always better to get your ex to call you, contact you, or seek you out... rather than the other way around.

So what does it mean when your ex is ignoring you? Not as much as you think it does. There are some very fast methods and techniques for turning the tide of your breakup, and for getting your ex to chase YOU. Learning what these are can make the difference between losing your ex for good or getting back in their arms again.

https://bitly.im/insw4

Answer 10

If there's anything that hurts more than getting dumped, it's the feeling of total detachment or disinterest from your ex boyfriend or girlfriend. One minute you're dating and seeing each other every day, and the next minute your ex seems cold, distant, and totally uninterested in hearing from you. So what gives?

What goes on in your ex's mind after they break up with you?

Before you can go about getting your ex back, you need to understand the basics of breakup mechanics. This means you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and start looking at things from your ex's perspective, with a level head and a clear mind. Right now, things aren't exactly as they seem. Although your ex can seem wholly uninterested in contact right now, it certainly doesn't mean that he or she doesn't still have feelings for you.

Breaking up is tough on the both of you. Your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend might seem carefree and callous right now, but this is usually a wall put forth to cover some very deep-seeded emotions. The bonds you formed while dating didn't happen overnight... they took months or even years to develop. By the same token, your ex's feelings for you aren't going to disappear at the drop of a hat, despite what it may outwardly look like at the moment.

To sum it up? Your ex still has feelings for you after the breakup. But the easiest way to keep the breakup going is for them to bury or ignore these feelings, and to detach from you as quickly and completely as possible. This is why your ex won't return your phone calls, answer your emails, or otherwise engage you in any form of contact right now. At the moment, they're too busy trying to keep you at arm's length so they can fully process the breakup.

Getting Your Ex To Want You Back - First Moves

An important thing most people don't realize is that getting back together is a two-way street. It's not enough to want your boyfriend or girlfriend back with every part of your heart and soul... you need to make your ex want YOU as well. Until that happens, reversing your breakup just won't be possible. Focusing on what your ex wants is a lot more important than focusing only on what you're trying to achieve.

To make your ex want you, the first thing you need to do is withdraw. The reason for this is simple: your ex needs to miss you before they can start wanting you back. Ever since the breakup, there's already a void in your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend's life where you used to be. There are things you used to do, places you used to go, and daily routines that no longer exist since he or she broke up with you.

Playing upon that, you can get your ex to miss you very quickly, even when they don't seem interested. The only problem with this is you can screw it up very easily through unwanted contact. Calling, texting, emailing, or even showing up to see your ex boyfriend or girlfriend are all counterproductive to the process of getting them back. Your ex won't ever start missing you if you're still always around, which is why going away and becoming a complete mystery to them is so important right now.

Essentially, you want your ex to think that you've moved on without them, as if the breakup hasn't affected you one bit. You want your ex worried about losing you, both as a friend or a potential fallback just in case they made a mistake by breaking things off. The less your ex knows about your post-breakup life, the more they'll be interested in hearing from you again. And the longer you can go without making any form of contact, the more you're piquing your ex boyfriend or girlfriend's interest.

Other ways to get your ex to call you

Making your ex come back to you is far, far better than running back to them. The less needy and desperate you seem, the greater your chances for successfully fixing your breakup. And best of all? When your ex comes looking for you, the new relationship you forge will be ten times stronger than if you were the one who chased after them. This is why it's always better to get your ex to call you, contact you, or seek you out... rather than the other way around.

So what does it mean when your ex is ignoring you? Not as much as you think it does. There are some very fast methods and techniques for turning the tide of your breakup, and for getting your ex to chase YOU. Learning what these are can make the difference between losing your ex for good or getting back in their arms again.

https://gitber.im/get-ex-back-fast