How can i forgive myself?

Question

I have made many mistakes which have hurt me. I have done badly in the past and lost love and things which were important to me. I have learned from the mistakes and have improved a lot. Now the problem is that those memories keep coming back to me and i keep thinking if only i had not made those mistakes i could be happy right now. How can i forgive myself and move on.

Answer 1

look regret is a useless emotion, you cant change the past, only learn from it, l have made some really bad mistakes in the past and as a teenager,and has taken years to get over it but l am always trying to think positive about it and hopefully will never get myself into situations and l don't over analyse what l have / havent done as the only person who you hurt is yourself, and is it doing you any good?? no it is not

Answer 2

I was the same way for many,many years and believe me it is really easy for me to sit here and give you examples, but until you discover your own personal "set back" you may drag your feet a little. Having those memories come back to you isn't necessarily a bad thing. You should remember what you've come through and mistakes you made so you will recognize the good that you do.
In order to forgive yourself, you need to realize that you are Human, and there is nothing wrong with making mistakes, there is something wrong with making the same mistake over and over!It may also help for you to make "ammends" for past mistakes, if it is possible. You will find that alot of those that you hurt have forgiven you long ago, so why shouldn't you forgive yourself.
Look at it this way, you may not have managed you life the way you would like up until now, but there is a great plan for all of us. It may take you some time to figure out what yours is, but when you do it will all come together!!
So be proud of yourself, live up to the moral standards that you have set for yourself, love yourself and move on!!
Oh, and 1 more thing, you said that you would be happy right now if you hadn't made those mistakes?? Not likely, if it was that great you most likely wouldn't have made the mistakes.

Pray for Peace!!

Answer 3

The problem you face right now is that nothing can be done to alter the past and that the best a person can hope for it to learn from their mistakes and move on. What other choice do we have but to do so? Sure, each of us can mire our feet in cement and lament the memories of missed opportunities, love that was lost and relationships that have gone astray. We can also sabotage ourselves by fearing to move on lest we make still more errors in judgment that bring more pain and suffering to ourselves and those around us. We can also make a conscious decision to let the past go and improve our lives by what we've learned along the way. Some of us need help doing that. Forgiveness is not an easy thing and continuing to live a life fraught with mistakes doesn't sound like a life worth living...but it is. Oh, it surely is! For it is the only opportunity we will ever have to make things right within our own lives so that when we touch another's, we will leave an indelible mark on it forever. Do what you can and do what you must. Seek the aid of a counselor or therapist and move ahead with your life lest you give yourself reason to lament more losses and lose more time than you already have.

Answer 4

Mom? Is that you?

No, seriously --

Every mistake you've ever made has contributed to making you into the person you are today. If you feel you have hurt others inappropriately, you may find closure by reaching out to them.

The important thing to realize is that you don't need forgiving. The 'you' that asks that question is already in the proper place. That 'you' has already learned.

Pay tribute to the you that suffered through the mistakes by not making them again, and continue forward.

Think of today and tomorrow... yesterday just got us here. If you don't act today for tomorrow, today is wasted.

Finally - the only thing preventing you from being happy right now is your choice not to be happy right now. Seriously. You own your emotions. I can call you names, but you get to decide how to let that affect you. Simply decide on who you want to be and how you want to feel and begin acting that way. Just think of your ideal self, then act like that, and become your ideal self.

Answer 5

Some people say that our Road of Life is predestined......I'm not sure about That; But, those memories are there for a purpose, like a road sign, to keep you on the RIGHT Road. Remember that: The Past IS IN THE PAST! Move On.

Answer 6

in my opinion, forgiving oneself is one of the hardest things to do in life. what works best for me is not forcing myself to just suddenly come to a resolution in one day or even a week. i take a very long time to consider my mistakes. i evaluate exactly how i went wrong and what i have learned in the process. i look for the positive gain in knowledge from my experiences in pain. i know i will never be able to forget the past but it satisfies me to know that i am now better equipped for the future.

Answer 7

I made many mistakes in my life as well...i have been down many roads that i was very embarresed to admit to..hurt innocent people in my life...i will tell you...all of that guilt, shame, despair of it...its all gone ....disappeared..it no longer has a hold on my life at all..i am a new person now..new eyes, new heart...new chance to live my life right....i will also tell you who took my pain, my sorrow, my shame...Jesus did on the cross...watch this free video about him and see what you think...www.jesusfilm.org

Answer 8

You know they told me one time that those memories and bad feelings are there to keep you from doing those things that hert ,,,before ,,, again.. get use to the pain you havn't made your last mistake , I promiss , even when you believe you have it all fixed , you'll surprise yourself by repeating the same dagone mistake all over again just like before you fixed it ..

Answer 9

How about trying to undo the harm that you caused? Try to undo the harm and you will feel better. If that is impossible, just try to be a good human being and everything will be fine.