My husband had the ring custom made but its just not me. Believe it or not, I think its actually too big. The center diamond is a carat but then there are two side diamonds on each side. The side diamonds are about the same height as the center so it just all blends together. I have pretty small fingers so you don't see any of the band at all from the top.
I have had the ring for 2 years now. I didnt want to hurt his feelings so I never said anything. But I can't stop thinking about how he paid $8000 for something I don't even like. I don't know if I should just tell him or live with it. My sister keeps telling me to get over it and move on but its been two years and I still think about it. I'm torn because part of me thinks he picked it for me and I should just be happy with it. And part of me thinks that I should just tell him because he has told me in the past with other gifts to tell him if I don't like it so he can get me something I do.
What should I do?
2007-09-16 14:19:31 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't get me wrong, I am very appreciative. It was completely unexpected. He always says one of the best things about me was I am not materialistic. I don't ask for gifts. My engagement ring and wedding band are the ONLY jewelry I ever wear. Just an example, lately, we have been arguing because he wants to move into a bigger house and I think the one we have is just fine. I am not being selfish. And I have tried to just be happy with it. The thing is I know how much it cost. Why have something that expensive when I don't like it? He was upset when he found out I really didnt want the ipod he got me, but just kept it becuase I didnt want to hurt his feelings. When I never used it, he figured out that I didnt like it and told me next time just to be honest. He would rather have spent the money on something I liked. Thats why I keep thinking that I should tell him. I feel like I am not being honest.
2007-09-16 14:48:02 · update #1
I would tell him ... not that I don't like it, but that I would like to change it and explain to him why. I am sure that if he is always asking you to tell him if you don't like something, it's because he wants to make you happy. There is nothing wrong with wanting to change it, but do it with him. Explain to him how you like things and he will get to know you better. That will help him choose better things for you in the future!!
2007-09-16 14:50:28 · answer #1 · answered by Karin H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do what I did , my 2nd husband gave me 1 of his grand mother's antique ring's its 9 diamonds in a flower shape in 14 carat gold and it's worth 8000 dollars I wont wear it I told him A.it's his grandmothers so it means something more then money to him and B.its so expensive I am scared if I bump into something I might lose 1 of the diamonds , so we both went and bought me a ring that cost $150 dollars its got a green emerald in it and 2 tiny cubic zirconia's and we were both very happy with the choice.
So just tell him you'd like something you wont be scared of breaking , loosing or de-valuing it.
I dont understand how anyone could want to wear anything worth more then $200 dollars , its just a risk I am not willing to take.
2007-09-16 22:03:24 · answer #2 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should just live with it. you're lucky to get any ring at all, let alone such an expensive one!! you lucky girl. many couples can't afford rings, and many women NEVER even get a ring!! i would suggest that you wait until your 5 year anniversary, and tell him that for your anniversary you would want one of the diamonds put in a new setting, and two of the diamonds made into earrings. it would be less likely to hurt his feelings, and he would think he's giving you a really special gift. just tell him that since you're older, you'd like to wear a more practical ring.
2007-09-16 21:29:55 · answer #3 · answered by KellyKapowski 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Get over it and be happy. Most women would be all too happy to be in your shoes. Just get a simple band and tell him you don't want anything to happen to the ring so you are saving it for when you go out.
2007-09-16 21:36:50 · answer #4 · answered by ╚╔╩╦ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he may have told you to tel him if you dont like gift but that is way dif than an engagement ring i wouldnt look at it like a gift do not tell him it would just break his heart lots of women would love to have a ring like that and there is a reason he custom made it that way be happy with what you got
2007-09-16 21:27:26 · answer #5 · answered by Tiffany R 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it's more important that you think about what the ring means. I know tons of girls who have a simple band with no stones at all, but they love their ring more than anything else because of what it represents: love
2007-09-16 21:27:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
A risk of hurting his feelings. tell him you hate it.....but keep in mind how fragile the male ego is. Personally, there seem to be other issues if a ring can bother you for two years...that is a bit excessive.
2007-09-16 21:30:18 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa W 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He took the time to design the ring for you? That is so sweet of him! The decision you face is between your personal taste versus your hubby's feelings. My vote is to spare his feelings and get over it. Learn to treasure what you have rather than what you don't.
2007-09-16 21:30:46 · answer #8 · answered by Jasmine808 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Wow, $8000 just for an engagement ring! What do you think this guy is made of money? Hell I would've just been happy with a ring from a .25 cent machine.
2007-09-16 21:28:10 · answer #9 · answered by Torey♥ 5 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Get a plain band and wear ur ring once in a while. Tell him you keep hitting the diamond against things and you don't want to lose it.
2007-09-16 21:28:03 · answer #10 · answered by momeeeof1 2 · 1⤊ 3⤋