Hi there..ok people one more question then I best be going...?

Question

I'll ask this to the Asian girls amongst us, what are your views on arranged marriages??....are you willing to settle down with someone thats been chosen by your elders??...I know alot of background digging goes on in finding a suitable partner lol (i'm of an ' Asian ' background myself)

Also, I know this is just a cultural thing too done in that part of the world, but still today more and more people decide to choose their own life partners. just wanted some views and opinions on this topic.

If your're a Non-Asian, would be interested in your comments too.

thanx xx

Answer 1

I don't agree in forced marriages, i.e. say when a young girl is married off to someone she has never met, and she doesn't want to marry him, but is scared of being rejected by her family if she doesn't.

However, in some ways I think an arranged marriage can work, if a parent knows of a man that would really be suited to his daughter, knows his family etc, and the young couple are introduced to one another and there is an attarction, then I think it can work. After all,its not a million miles away from two people getting "set up" by well meaning friends is it? I was introduced to my husband by friends, and although we weren't intoduced with the intention of it leading to marriage, we did get married, and it worked out great.

At the end of the day, as long as the two people involved want to marry each other, then thats all that really matters.

Answer 2

I am not Asian but I have Asian friends and working with a lot of Asians. My thoughts on the matter are that if the girl and boy are willing to accept the arrangements and the person they are going to marry then it is acceptable. It is after all their culture. I have heard remarks that arranged marriages last longer and better than our English system. Now this may be true but not, I think, because the marriage is arranged but because if a woman leaves her husband not only do her husbands family have nothing further to do with her but her own family ostracise her as well so the pressure for a woman to stay in a bad marriage is enormous

Answer 3

i'm an asian living in asia.

i don't think arranged marriages are still practiced here in my country, not in a long time.

i think there are more "modern" versions of it though. i think they're called mail-order brides, business mergers, personal ads--and other practices that encourage people to enter marriage without really knowing their partners enough.

Answer 4

I would imagine that it depends on the mindset of those involved. Personally, that would never happen to me. But for some, they are raised under that custom, and don't know any different. That is what they perceive as normal, and if it works for them, great. Since I know differently, and am independent, that is not an option I would personally explore.