Why do some compare themselves to those who seem to be better off than they are, but...?

Question

fail to realize how much better off they are than 90% of the world?

For example, a person will post on here that they are contemplating suicide because they are not popular, and they feel they should not live - but fail to realize that there are people in Darfour, for example, who clearly have horrible conditions, but WANT to live, they are not suicidal, and they are in horrible living conditions, and have none of the luxuires that ANYONE on YA has - why do they fail to make that simple comparison before spouting?

Answer 1

A friend of mine complained to me that she was sick and tired of being too poor to buy the things she wanted from a catalogue company that had just sent her their latest catalogue! What she particularly wanted was a very expensive duvet set that would do the same job as any other duvet set in the privacy of her bedroom! I began to make the usual sympathetic noises when it struck me that she had bedrooms, beds, duvets and pillows as well as existing and adequate covers for everything!
I suppose that everything is relative; in England we want to know that we have friends eager to spend time with us, in Darfour it is a good day if you meet no one who wants to rid the earth of you. In England a flood has been devastating if the waters rose high enough to ruin your living room furniture, in Mozambique a flood was really not so bad if you still have some top soil left afterwards! The thing is that we do not compare our situation with that of complete strangers, only with that of people who are familiar to us and the sense of devastation or despair is real, however ill-founded it may seem to be.

Answer 2

I have often pondered over the very same thing!! In fact, many people are so obsessed with themselves & their 'sorrows' that they fail to recognise others, who are in a far much worse state than themselves.

We are also living in such a materialistic society where it is not enough to have a car, house, food, clothes etc. but people will 'waste' silly amounts of money to get the 'best' of those stated above.

Giving money to those less fortunate (who may not even have their basic needs met) is looked down upon/ refused/not even considered & instead people consider themselves 'not to have enough'...

We have plenty to be grateful for and little to complain about...heck, we even have the internet- how deprived are we?!!!

Answer 3

The cross we bear on our backs is the biggest and heaviest for us. there an old story that prays:
A man carrying his cross on his back met Jesus and he told him that he wanted to get rid of his cross, that is was bigger and heavier than any other so Jesus made him choose the one he thought was the lightest one but the moment he started carrying it he realised how much he missed his old one since this one was heavier than the previous one. Jesus told him what I wrote in the first line.
I'm not a Christian but I think is applicable to illustrate my point.
In other words, no human is happy with his/her life. Everybody wants to change something and they say that would solve their problems or give a reason to live. He who is blond wants be a brunette, whoever is skinny wants to be fat, whoever is fat wants to be skinny and so on and so forth. To us others have easier lives, simpler problems. We never stop to think that if there will always be people who are worse or better than we are. We should be happy with what we have and try to do our best, life gives us what we need in order to help us learn some kind of lesson. I'm not telling people to be mediocre but to cease feeling frustrated if something seems not meant to be. Everything happens for a reason.
At least, that's how I think

Answer 4

It's all about us! Who cares about the poverty & starving millions , the children without parents because of the aids epidemic in the third world, those dying in the thousands not because of food shortages or illness but because of the Mugabes of this world !

Who gives a toss ? Do you ? Do I ? When it comes down to it we may give a pittance of a donation to a collection for a worthy cause , pat ourselves on the back for a job well done !

We all need a boot up the backside ....to get our individual houses in order , to show some genuine compassion.....it has to start with US !

Answer 5

Perhaps the next time u see a post on one contemplating suicide- you should response and remind them of the great treasures that the "simplicity of life brings" . Beautifully articulated- this may change someone's life and thought pattern.. God Bless!

Answer 6

We have this human body. We can do things animals cannot. We don't realise how fortunate we really are. Reading about all these problems - the mortgage crisis, the little McCann girl, bombings, floods, hurricanes etc; but especially financial based crises makes me reassess what life is really about.

Answer 7

Good point you've made there...who knows??..I find it sad that these days people would rather " imitate " other peoples looks and lifestyles ( im thinking about people imitating celebs )..I mean cant people find their own identity in who they are???? develop their own talents??? and not just strut their stuff copying the likes of others.Just sooo sad that they have to COPY others peoples looks and personalities to make a name for themselves in this forever me-me-me self obsessed and only-looks-and-appearance-matters society. GET A GRIP !!

p.s have a star from me too..

Answer 8

A persons environment only shows them in a different light to an outside body looking in. The version of their life is still inappropriately continuing to haunt their consciousness in spite of its surroundings.

Answer 9

Because we as humans want to strive for better (I guess there are some exceptions) but we look to the people we want to imitate the most and that's usually people who are better off than us.

Answer 10

People react differently to different stimuli. Also, you have to remember that much of what we have, we don't perceive as luxuries. Things that are around you all the time aren't going to be seen as luxury items, no matter if they actually are.