i am a single mother with 3 kids, and my 14 yr old daughter is having sex and is involved with drugs and drinking, but i dont know how to catch her. i was worse at her age and i dont know how to deal with this!!! help!!!
2007-09-15 10:53:40 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
OK MOM LISTEN UP HERE WE GO~FIRST of all you need to have to be informed where she is at all times now mom if she says shes going to be for example at susies house till 9 then you go to susies house and see if shes there~you are going to have to be checking up on her WORD to make sure its true and good ~yes this is going to take alot of time but soon she will understand you will be popping in to check on her~now you need to see and talk to all her friends parents and see if you approve of them and there living style if not theres power in the answr NO so you have your work cut out for oyu~you can act on this or not it of course is your choice and it sounds ike you do want to~terrific so many let kids go at this age and then the trouble grows~now by doing this you will catch her drinking i am sure of it~then step it up when u do omg then make her tell you where shr got it and go to the police and turn them in~whomever is with her tell there parents too~you may be on her black list but in the long run she will respect you for it~now sex is the same i hare to say it but these drop ins r gr8 once you know where your going you can drop in drive by call visit and then u will see action~~~take her to the doctor and straight up in front of the doc say i am here to have here drug tested dont tell her that b4 you go~u know how it was when u were young but i was raised with a strict parent~please please u sound so much in need i feel 4 u now just act~~~also contact the school and they will tell you whom shes hanging around with~you also have the rites to visit the school `sign in 1st ~ the more u appear the more she will be scared to screw up~also ask to go thru her locker try to get to the bottem whom the booze buyers are and whom is sexually taking advantage of her be it a man 18 or older call the police ~goodluck God bless mom of 3 terrific kids that yes didnt like me alot of times to now love me to pieces! i typed this fast and my spell checker is not working sorry
2007-09-15 11:15:06 · answer #1 · answered by ladysosureone 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea, fasten your seat belts folks its gonna be a bumpy ride. It was eight years of hell for me starting at 14 my daughter. If I had it to do over I'd just let it ride. You cannot make a difference, some of the kids have to go to the school of hard knocks. I'd move away if I were you. In fact i did, she found me, "Wow, she said with her big meth eyes you moved into a mansion" Well she was not done with drugs,until two rehabs later 1 little boy, the child protection took from me to give back to her cause thats they're new policy. He has a hell life as our welfare system locks kids up in day care 10 hrs a day, and thats hardley enough for her. She is currently sober but not that different really as reality to her is still out there having a party. So, let her go, pray for her but let go emotionally now cause you'll get old fast other wise and besides she'll never appreciate you, mine has yet to show any affection for other than her friends. She is hell bound, and is twirling a man around for a second time, guess she didn't get enough of his bank account the first time, and played on the guy every time she could bragging to me about it.
2007-09-15 11:09:04 · answer #2 · answered by kim 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like your daughter is gay or curious about her sexuality. Growing up in a Christian household, she might think that you won't love her anymore if she tells you she's gay. You need to talk to her and tell her that it's ok, no matter if you believe it is or not. No matter what you want to believe, you can't force a gay person to become straight. And I know you're concerned about her, but speaking as a girl of your daughter's age, I can say that I would be terribly upset if I found out that my parents were looking through my internet history and cyber stalking me on FaceBook. Good luck with your daughter.
2016-05-20 05:35:08 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is kind of tough.
Being a single mom with three kids, man, I can just imagine how tough it may be.
What I would do is try grounding her. Taker her cell phone (if she has one), take everything away from her.
See what this does. If possible, I would even take her to like a teen shelter or something like that, get some books on STD's and even some videos on that sort of thing.
I have a 12yo boy and a 13yo girl and they know if they even think of stuff like that they know to come to us but kids these days are so easily pursuaded and drawn in by the "wrong crowd", its easy for them to give in to peer pressure.
Our kids overall are pretty good and we keep them busy with school activities, church, etc.
Hope this helps and good luck!!
2007-09-15 11:07:01 · answer #4 · answered by Michael C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am the person you need to talk to. I will write more in a few minutes. I went through this with my daughter it was heartbreaking. What I suggest is to go to the courts and have what a Chins order put on her. The court will give her rules she will have to obide by. If she dont comply she has to answer to the judge. In most cases that is enough, but not in mine. My daughter took our case to the limit and was drinking smoking pot and started running away. This was my honor student. Hard to believe. My daughter had to be taken out of the home after being out of the home for a few weeks their was remarkable changes. She is another person now. Tough love. Email me janinebat@msn.com if you want more or just want to talk.
2007-09-15 11:05:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my. I am so sorry to hear that.
first, be strong.... you have to be at this point.
second... she is 14, where is she getting these drugs and how late is she out at night.
You are the parent... you MUST have control, she may hate you now for it, but she will be nothing but greatful downt he road.
Can you guys maybe go away, on a little vacation or something, where maybe you can be more open and talk about eveything. She needs her mom right now more then anything, you have got to get her help, maybe you can go to counseling with her??
good luck, keep your head up.
Best of luck, god bless you.
2007-09-15 11:03:11 · answer #6 · answered by sjb 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do not all of a sudden just not let her go out. She will react completely negatively. Make sure she cant sneak out. Start slowly not letting her go out. Be persistent and constant. If you have to go to extreme measures you should consult help. Get her drug tested, you are her mother, act like one. Do not let her use the excuse that you where worse, because you are different now and she should be too.
hope it works out for you.
2007-09-15 11:36:34 · answer #7 · answered by Sly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let her go anywhere. If you do show up to where she is supposed to be and check on her. If she is not there, call her and find out where she is. Make her take a drug test. She will rebel, but it could save her life!
2007-09-15 10:59:40 · answer #8 · answered by honeybear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi
My name is Emily, I am a producer at The Steve Wilkos Show in Chicago. Steve has helped parents confront out of control teens before. If you are interested in having him help and sharing your story on the show, please call me at 888 321 5358 or email me.
Thanks
2007-09-15 11:22:09 · answer #9 · answered by nbcproducer7 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Keep her at home. She's too young to be in unsupervised situations were she can have sex and do drugs.
2007-09-15 11:11:00 · answer #10 · answered by Cam 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋