Been married over 20 years have children (youngest 12), two in college and one in HS. Over past 20 years, found out my husband is not only alcoholic but addicted to vicodin. He has been to rehave and out and back into the vicodin. I am ready to divorce him but I am afraid I may not financially be able to keep my house. He does have a salary comparable to mine. Anyone out there have any thoughts on this. We have two college students we cover payments on and a large mortgage payment . When divorced how does all the finances get divided? He has agreed to use the same attorney (because he realizes he has caused all the problems)
2007-09-15 10:53:04 · 6 answers · asked by heavnknowz 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
depends on what state you are in. but anything that is paid for and has your name on it or not try to keep as much as you can without financial burdens, let him have those. Talk to your lawyer, they will know for sure.
2007-09-15 11:03:42 · answer #1 · answered by lana s 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Finances should be divided on the basis of the needs of both parties and the children of the marriage. This includes the need for housing, maintenance and education. An agreed settlement is usually the most economic way of doing this, but independent legal advice before the final agreement is signed by both of you is a necessity. Otherwise your husband may have grounds in the future to argue that he was "forced" into the agreement and challenge the settlement through the courts.
2007-09-15 16:16:21 · answer #2 · answered by cautious 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you both should agree on things prior to seeing this attorney. Attorneys can really make things more complicated. If you think things should be equally divided it shouldn't be that difficult. Get your more appraised to find out what it is worth. It doesn't sound like you are bitter about it and that you still get along with him meaning you both should be agreeable to each others terms. As for your children(under 18) I think you should research equal parenting(as long as he stays straight during his parenting time), it is better for the both of you, because if he is paying too much in child support etc, etc, he won't be able to afford to help with college expenses. Just because it didn't work out between the two of you is no reason your children not to have a great relationship with their dad.Good Luck!!!
2007-09-15 11:08:34 · answer #3 · answered by shellybgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi the bookstore and get the latest DIY divorce guide for your state. It will walk you through all the rules... very empowering.
Gather financial statements of any sort... 401K, retirement funds, CD, IRA, checking and savings accounts... you are due 1/2 of all assets accrued during your marriage and will need this documentation to get it. If nothing else, consider that you are preserving these resources from his behavior.
Overall, everything is divided down the middle... that includes all debts, real estate and cars... and you will need to list everything and their ID/VIN/Loan numbers.
You may also require "spousal support" during the post-divorce period, as well as child support through college.
2007-09-15 11:07:10 · answer #4 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See a lawyer. It's different state to state. With grown children, I will tell you it is very hard to get any kind of spousal support now if both husband and wife work outside the home. A lawyer will tell you your best options. You don't say if you still love him. If you do, then try to get your family involved and have an intervention. Try to save his life. You may be doing you and him a favor. God Bless.
2007-09-15 11:01:29 · answer #5 · answered by swtserenity43 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Isn't it a conflict of interest to use the same attorney you use?---Usually it's divided 50/50.
2007-09-15 11:02:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋