I have asked him to get rid of at least some of it. And that was 2 years ago. And he still has it all and keeps adding to his collection. We have a 6 year old and a 1 year old in the house.
2007-09-15 10:28:58 · 14 answers · asked by aboarder82 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why wait for him to get rid of it? If you know where the nearest trash dump is, load it up into a garbage bag and take it there yourself!
Him keeping it in the house is disrespectful to you and the children. Don't put up with it!
2007-09-15 10:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by Dee Marie 4 · 3⤊ 6⤋
Was there a time that you did accept him looking at porn? I'm sure you have confronted him many times with this and he probably says he will get rid of it, and then you find more. It becomes a trust issue along with a feeling of infidelity that most men dont understand. My boyfriend is the same way. Even though he knows how I feel about it, he still does it every chance he can. I know because I have came home for lunch and "surprised" him. ( I now call ahead of time, so I dont have to deal with it). We also have children 8 and 3 and another on the way. He keeps his stuff way hidden, but he still loves his onling sites....I think you need to sit down with him and really talk about it. Is it something that you can accept? How far are you willing to take this? You may want to check out this site www.marriagebuilders.com Its a great site to help work through this problem and many others. It validates how you are feeling about this. You are not alone, believe me. Good luck.
2007-09-15 17:50:41 · answer #2 · answered by daisy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People owning porn isn't that bad, but he seems to have a problem with how much he buys! Porn can really spice up the sex life if you don't allow it to effect your self-esteem. I do agree with a previous comment though ... there is no word of a ring or marriage yet you live together with 2 kids - if he can't commit to you then he won't be able to commit to getting rid of his stash. Don't allow this if he is reading or watching this stuff in front of the kids! Make sure it is at least out of their view!
2007-09-15 20:52:53 · answer #3 · answered by carissa m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm... well, I say, there's really no way of forcing him to give up the porn. Some guys just love their porn, and that's all there is to it.
But since the question of children is involoved, I say that you should sit down and have a talk with him, and explain to him that having two curious children in the house means that he needs to keep his spank bank VERY well hidden, preferably under lock and key. If that means he needs to downsize, well then, tough $hit. Kids don't need to be seeing stuff like that, it could psychologically effect them more than you'd expect. And if your boyfriend loves you, and loves your kids, then he should put the welfare of the children before his own stupid carnal desires. Explain all this to him, and why it is important. Try not to start a fight with him - DON'T use language that makes it sound like you're attacking him. Just be loving and gentle about it, and maybe he'll understand how important it is.
Also understand that you need to consider your own motivations for confronting him. Is it the fact that he looks at porn that bothers you, or is it because your children may have access to it? If it's only because you don't like him looking at it, he may not take to your bringing it up so well.
2007-09-15 17:42:16 · answer #4 · answered by das_teufel_katze 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
there is a problem. you are the real deal. he can touch, feel and do all the other wonderful things.
why hang on to used magazines.
your boy has a problem.
most men will get rid of the stuff and play with the real deal.
start reading them in bed. when he asks you what you think, tell him you are just trying to understand as you see no benefits or value in the magazines.
2007-09-15 18:39:36 · answer #5 · answered by ramni222 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like your a little obsessive since you've counted it all... I'll admit he's not taking your feelings into consideration, but have you guys tried to compromise? by the way, why are you bringing your kids into this? what's his take on the situation? has he given you a reason why he won't get rid of it? unless he's forcing you (or God forbid your kids) to watch it/ read it/ look at it, then really, what's your problem with it?
2007-09-15 17:50:45 · answer #6 · answered by burnttoast97 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well at this point not much just be sure it is all under lock and key where the children will not be exposed to this trash!he is not getting rid of it and you know that at least he did not lie about it and hide it from you like mine did.he is just a boyfriend he is not your husband and since you already live together and i assume he is the father of at least the youngest kid he is not going to marry you.so if it bothers you so much move out already.next man marry him before you even think of having another baby or you will always be a girlfriend and never a wife!good luck.
2007-09-15 17:40:05 · answer #7 · answered by dixie58 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
howcome theres no diamond or wedding? He should commit a long time ago...do you want this arrangement forever with no commitment...i think he should get rid of it or at least put them up high where the kids cant reach..
2007-09-15 17:34:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
u should watch the movies and read the magazines then put them in a safe place that the children don't see them.
2007-09-15 17:34:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
He doesn't HAVE to mind you, you're not his mother. Hell you're not even his wife! You don't get to make demands on him, he is just your boyfriend.
2007-09-16 00:30:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋