Serious answers only!!! How does control (read on)?

Question

How does control, power trips, denial, and self seeking-self loathing liar relate to unsatisfaction of life and work and unhpappiness with self and others? Please be critical and provide examples. (A friend greatly needed help and I couldn't help him with this question.)

And yes, how do you help him deal with those people in that question?

Answer 1

That's a pretty complex combination of complexes!! I was married to "one of those" for 8 yrs and it was UNBELIEVABLE!! The only reason I stayed that long is that we had a child and I tho't that it wasn't harming her, because the abuse came out on me at night. After I literally escaped w/ my daughter, I went back to school and got degrees in Guidance and Counseling and a lot of clinical training. I never married again--but the work I did for 21 yrs with very troubled adolescents, lead me to believe that boys are scarred by their mothers' abandonment/mistreatment/other forms of abuse! My husband had been left with his unloving father at the age of 7; had a new step-mother, 21 yrs of age when he was 11, and he developed brutal sado-masocistic behr toward women.----Not knowing your friend's situation--First, I'd advise her to escape!! I think that those men are unhelpable!!!

Answer 2

This is a case of low self-esteem. Low self-esteem can be traced retrospectively in the self-talk, the conversation we conduct with ourselves. When one is aware of his/her self-talk, the talk one conduct with oneself, he/she can be pulled out from this trap of low esteem. A lot of things remain running in the reward system of the brain and it keeps reminding ourselves that we talk with ourselves. . This is automatic system and there is no filtering system of thoughts. Therefore we should be very aware what is saying to ourselves. Soliloquy is the causative factor. Please be aware of it. You must listen to audios containing material of how to handle self-talk, go to library or find any online resource from where you can get free access to personal development material. I can recommend you a book “self-talk solutions”. I am reading this book now a day and getting a lot. I extracted above comments from that book.