I have very poor social skills, and I was a loner most of my life. Am I autistic?

Question

I was a loner from young to high school. I don't talk to ppl or take an interest in them. People find me weird and I was often the target of bullying. Since coming to uni I noticed I've severe deficiency in talking to ppl normally. I reckoned my level of communication is like that of a 10-12 year old. But I can write well and learn new stuff. However I noticed I can only grasp the basic stuff of things (especially lecture material in my courses) but not the more advanced, complex details while studying.
The problem also is that I find myself quite rigid and not open to new ideas.
I was wondering if I was autistic? People don't seem to want to talk to me. I noticed I tend to be a silent observer as though events and people are playing like a movie. I also wonder do I need psychological treatment? Do I have mental regression or something?

And as for you Heidi!!! shut up and piss off, you are a nuisance. Stupid girl.

Answer 1

you might want to figure out just why you were a loner, I mean like were your parents too busy to help you make friends, or encourage you to make friends, or take you to sports or events? Maybe it's not your fault and you are just a tad backward and all you need is more exposure so you can learn. A lot of people in this world "write" (for instance...I understand you do that well, but this is just an example) at a very young level and in fact some don't know how to write at all and yet get thru life fine, even footballplayers (who earn superb incomes) so you need more getting out and experiencing new things. Learning more advanced things takes time to get used to the big words and understanding the material but you can teach yourself to do that, and then moving on more quickly will help you grasp even more things, it's a process. You'll catch on, just keep at it and keep pushing yourself. If you're rigid maybe you need to take some courses on creativity and thinking outside the box. No, you're not autistic. Perhaps people don't seem to want to talk with you because your interests are limited, or mayibe you don't show interest in them. To have a friend you need to first be a friend. You need to step outside the box you're in and smell the roses. No no, nothing is wrong with you that a little exposure to life won't cure. Join some organizations and speak up, voice your opinion, even ask others to show you how to do something, learn new things, make a list of things you'd like to learn and then do that. Then go to the net and see what else is out there to learn. Try some projects, or get into a class where teamwork is involved. Maybe this is strange, but I like websites like: http://www.howstuffworks.com/
learn stuff and then discuss it with others....find people who have the same interests as you do.

Answer 2

As a professional psychologist, I can tell you that no one can give you a diagnosis over the internet. However, you might want to look up Aspeger's Disorder, which is an autism spectrum disorder and read more about it. There are some things from your description that suggest similarities, although again, you should be seen professionally to be sure.
What I would suggest is that you go to your university's mental health or counseling or Learning Disabilities center and ask them for a psychological assessment. If they can't do one there, they should refer you to a psychologist.
You can find out more about autism, autism spectrum disorders and Aspergers on sites like:
www.webmd.com
www.aspergers.com
www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/aswhatisit.html

There are many more sites such as these. I'm not sure where you got the mental regression idea (nor am I exactly sure what you mean by it) - but mental regression doesn't have anything to do with autism or Aspergers.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Hey Stan,
Your story sounds exactly like a carbon copy of my life. To this day I still have issues with people, and have only 2 friends. However I have learned to be more open. You do not have some mental disorder or any other kind of head problem, no matter what people tell you. What I did was join the National Guard, and after basic training, I found myself much more opinionated, and open. I got a girlfriend, a good job, got married and had kids. I still do not like change, and I try to steer clear of large crowds, but if I must go to a mall or some place where there is alot of people, it's no problem. You just need to find your own groove and stick to it. Don't worry about what others have to say. Remember: THE MEEK SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH.

Answer 4

You are definitely not autistic... An autistic person wouldn't said him or herself is autistic lol... Anyway, being able to go to uni is already a proof that you aren't autistic because autistic people tend to learn things much, much slower... Even if they are over 20s they act like little kids...

Anyway, you probably just have some communication problems... Probably not sociable, or don't really like talking etc. Like you said you are a loner... Probably you are just too used to being alone that you are not making new friends subconsciously...

The best way I think to be more sociable is try making new friends online first, maybe through games or friendster etc... Since you said you can write very well, I suppose using typing as a form of communication shouldn't be that hard for you...

Answer 5

i aint a psycologist or a uni student but i can see how not communicating with people can affect your studies i also suffer the same problem as you but i didnt try to run from it,no the only way to solve this problem is to face it head on.Not being a sociable person before in the past i understand that being a spectator is all you feel comfortable to be right?You cant just talk to people like that. you have to get to know them and remember 1 important rule everyone loves themself more then they care for anyone else,yes,this is sad and selfish but its true if you want people to be your friends just think abour them a bout their problems step out of your life for a second and look at the world a round you.I found it difficult at first but whats intresting is after a while i had a whole bunch of friends who were all very nice because when you think about them they also think about you.

What have you got to lose if you try this I promise it will make your life a whole lot happier.

Answer 6

you know what, we're same,but for me it's simple. After living in this world about 15 years ( cause i'm 15 years old ) I suggest you be a casual type person ( Like me )

This is the solution

Discover your attributes, exhibit and explain to others. ( Late understanding, Money oriented, Time punctual, reading, exercise, stamp collection, discussing social issue, not like girl side spending on marriage, not like guys not cooking or cleaning, not believing in democracy, religious thoughts, old movie songs etc )

Stand for something, like principles of not be lire or not eating in marriage function.

Be unique like wear certain type of cloths to create brand mahatma gandhi is a example

Be seen – even if your behavior is criticized be in touch of people and don’t avoid people gathering.

Make a connection - you need to remind an emotion that allows your target, needs being met.

Be open – accept others opinion too unless they are proved wrong, other side change your wrongful act if found wrong. do not hesitate to say sorry.

Do homework – before speaking and before appearing in crowd

Do not believe in permanency – Everything is temporary including yourself, so do not keep fix attitude to things, friends and even enemies too.

Be optimistic – on all issues

Respect your self – Do not be cheap or available always, keep ratio 3: 1 in easy going and stiff actions day.

Answer 7

You sure can write well.
Is there psychological counseling for students at the Uni?
I know when I got to college I was suprised at the high level and intensity of the lectures especially American History. It was an adjustment.

Answer 8

I relate to what you've shared and can say with certainty, you're meant to follow a different path than johnny average. You haven't yet honed your social skills, but that will come as you become more secure with yourself. I truly believe there's a unique spot for you in this universe - be proud that you're different because it's the individualists who contribute the greatest to society.

Answer 9

Yes Dude U need phsycological treatment but i wud love to be ur friend and talk to u u just need company try thinking that people are good only thing they need smeone to bosst them!!!take care be happy man!!!

Answer 10

I think God , who created you , has a special plan for you.....you need to find out what he wants you to do...