Wife gets crazy and abusive!!! what to do?

Question

I have been married to my wife for over 3 years and the first one was great. Now it seems that I am seeing her true colors and I’m in the middle of a bad situation. She is a great housewife cause she was brought up to be very clean and organized.. She is very hyper and has a good intention to help out. However whenever she gets angry or want something she acts crazy, looses control and start to say things and destroying everything I have like: GPS of my car, my cell phone, my laptop and many times she punches me and gets crazy … she makes a scene in front of my friends or even public places hitting me in the face or even spitting me when I tried to control her. I am starting to hate her and as many times I tried to resolve this she just don’t make changes or seek help for us. Now I asked her to leave for a while but is getting impossible at this stage since she doesn’t want to work or be outside the house … I’m a man so its difficult to have people to understand ...

I tried counceling, treatment, talked to her millions of times ... I dont know what else to do??? This is killing me !!

Answer 1

I am sorry that your wife treated you so badly,she seem out of control,she needs professional help,it is terrible if you have children that they witness such violent behavior.

Answer 2

I would tell you the same thing I would tell a woman in your situation---GET OUT!!! Emotional and verbal abuse are just as damaging as physical abuse. Nobody should be threatened, demeaned, or attacked in these ways. You cannot fix her and it is not your job to save her. If she doesn't want to work outside the house too bad that's her problem. Document the abuse, file a complaint, and end this toxic relationship. Maybe some people don't understand but abusive personalities are not a male issue, there are many abusive women and it's time they were held to the same expectations and consequences as the men in our society. She is wrong and it cannot continue. I wish you the best of luck and anybody that doesn't "understand" is an idiot. Somewhere out there is a real wife for you that will love, respect, and honor you for the man you are and who you can love, respect , and honor as well.

Answer 3

Clearly she has a problem and doesn't want to deal with it. Have you spoke with her family? Maybe someone else can talk to her and say they have seen her do the things you mention. Sometimes people respond better when they hear things from outsiders rather than just the spouse. Also, speak with your doctor. I always suggest this because I have seen people that have an imbalance or even a allergic reaction to something that can effect their stability. A doctor may have a different take on things and I'm sure would be able to advise you better.The bottom line though is...you can't help someone who doesn't want help...no matter how much you may want to. Make sure you take care of yourself and seek any help you may need in order to deal with this.

Answer 4

ok first it doesnt matter if you are a man or not you are a human and you have rights. if you feel threatened in any way do something about it. you will be more of a chicken if you stay concealed and dont tell anyone rather then goin and telling people. just because your a man that doesnt mean that you dont have feelings and you cant feel pain.

i would leave her
you can always do better then bad and if you are getting hit and abused its bad. it doesnt matter who the aggressor is.
you need to stand up for yourself and do whats best for you.

seriously think about it. you can sit and take it all like a "real man" should
or you can do something about it and create a new image one that isnt about being fake
do what you prefer

Answer 5

You need to report this behavior to the police. There is no need for you to accept this type of abusive just because you are a man. If the tables were turned you would be behind bars right now. Next time she loses control call the cops I bet that she'll start to curb her uncontrollable behavior then.You don't dare put your hands on her , and I don't think that you should , and she should not put her hands on you. Dude, you are a better man than I. I wouldn't put up with this stuff for a moment.

Answer 6

It's time to put your foot down. Have you called the police on her yet? Have you filed for a restraining order? I'm sure you have told her to stop. Since she didn't listen take the next step. Show her that you are willing to stand up for yourself because you are a man who respects himself. If she doesn't learn after spending a night in jail, it's time to leave. Get into marriage counseling and she needs some meds along with personal counseling. I'm sure that she can get better if she's willing to work on her self. You can't change her. You have to be prepared to do the hardest thing if she refuses to get better.

Answer 7

divorce
period
there is no sense of being with such a unstable women
and her true colors were apparent long ago, you just over looked those flaws since you "were in love".....
if you stay then it says you condone it and you think you cannot find another women to love you, but you can
as you must remember in any relationship both parties are replaceable
there is no such thing as soul mates for life, yes it's true that people get married with good intentions, but the road to hell is paved with good intentions, you just married wrong and do not want to admit it, so you made an a error in judgment, be a man, learn you lesson and divorce her

Answer 8

If you've tried couselling and getting her treatment and everything else, you've got to leave. There is no need for you to be taking this abuse. I'd even consider pressing charges, but I understand that as a man it's hard to do this. Of course, slowly awareness about domestic abuse against men is arising and hopefully you can get her case prosecuted. You don't deserve this.

I know you say she doesn't want to work or leave the home so you feel responsible to take care of her, but guess what! Thank goodness for feminism because you don't have to be her keeper! If you leave her, she'll have to get a job instead of leeching off of men. Her unwillingless to work outside of the home is another form of abuse. She is using you.

You deserve better.

Answer 9

She has a serious problem. She needs professional help and you start by taking her to your family doctor. Make it clear that she needs to get real help or you're out of it. Can you talk to a member of her family, does she have a sister or brother or can you talk to her parents about the situation. Keep track of everything she has destroyed, destruction of personal property is a crime. Next time she has one of those violent fit, call or visit your local police, ask them to come for a visit and have a 'talk' with her....once she understand that she could go to jail for what she's doing she may calm down.

Answer 10

Wow seems like you guys need professional help. The only way to solve this would be you trying to talk to her and ask her to admit that she has problems, she'll probably have to take some anger management classes because her behavior is pretty bad, tell her that your marriage depends on it, let her know how you feel, how hurt you are, and how you can't take it anymore, and seek professional help, like therapy for not only her but you as well. Good luck!!

Answer 11

Sorry, but I didn't read all the answers..
but ur question hit home with me..
I understand what u are saying..

My sister was the same way .. in her marriage of 28 years.. !!!and her hubby didn't no what do .. he was/is a good man..
well he divorced her finally...

my sister.. was very jolly around people,, but she gave him hell..
.. she was manic depressive,, and was bi-polar.. had high blood pressure..
we didn't find out until her death at age 58.
u need to go read about this.. and see if she fit the bill..
if so,,,
she needs to be on med's asap... the bi-polar can be serious to herself and to you and or others? do u have kids?
she threw fits,, wanted to fight with him like a man, she lost her temper for no reason..
good luck and I hope this helps...