I love my husband very much but the only thing is, he hardly ever remarks on my appearance. If I ask him, he only gives a one word answer. I'm interested in another man's view on this matter but I don't want my husband's friend to think I'm coming on to him-because I'm not. I like him just as a friend and ONLY that, and he know's how I feel. Should I ask him when my husband's in the room? My husband's friend is not married but is dating a girl that I think is a great person.
2007-09-14 15:28:52 · 23 answers · asked by Shortie Cake 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes it is inappropriate to ask your husbands friend, is it really that important to you to be told how you look, If you need to be told that you're pretty tell your husband that, men are not so thoughtfull at times, and they have to be reminded.
2007-09-14 15:44:04 · answer #1 · answered by Vivian S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If appearance concerns you, have them both (your spouse and his friend) in the same room (perhaps even at a dinner table) when you ask his friend. That way his friend will be put in a spot and end up looking at your husband for "his approval" on what to say. Do not ask the friend, when his girlfriend is around because it will look awkward and she might get jealous. Only ask when the 3 of you are present. Hope this helps.
2007-09-14 16:21:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love your husband as much as you claim, then why would you care if other men find you attractive? It's not like you're just wanting a general opinion.. If that were the case, you wouldn't need to ask your husband's friend. Why is it so important to you, for him (the friend) to tell you that you're pretty? It sounds to me like (even though you don't seem to realize it) that you're setting yourself up for a dangerous road.. You are obviously seeking attention/compliments from other men, when you are a married woman. There is no place for that nonsense in a marriage, and you need to just keep your mouth shut, before you do something you're going to regret.
Do you really have such little self-esteem that you need other people to tell you that you're "pretty"?! That's sad.. You're husband loves you, and he obviously has told you that you're pretty, even though he may not go overboard like you'd like him to do.
My advice to you: Quit worrying about whether or not other people think you're pretty. You're a married woman, and it shouldn't matter if other men find you attractive or not. You have a husband who loves you, that's what is important.
2007-09-15 03:21:35 · answer #3 · answered by arkiegirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should never ask any one if they think you are pretty. For one think they are more apt to lie because you put them on the spot. They might say you are pretty, even if they don't think so. So you won't be able to rely on their answer. If they think your pretty and want to tell you then they will. You are very vain, if that is important to you.
Your outside appearance is not what counts any way. What makes a person beautiful is how they treat others.
2007-09-14 15:47:08 · answer #4 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes because the only person who has the right to be asked is your husband. your motive maybe good but asking your husband's friend will appear and sound suggestive. why don't you talk to your husband and tell him of your need for affirmations instead of getting it from other people?
2007-09-14 18:32:30 · answer #5 · answered by stel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you that insecure in your marriage where you need to see your husbands jealously over you and another man. Don't start trouble between your husband and his best friend that would be a very mean thing to do.
2007-09-14 17:25:03 · answer #6 · answered by Teenie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some girls love the attention and need to be reassured that they are pretty and attractive and desired by men. Nothing wrong with that!
Have you thought about posting your pic on "rate my Pic" (not a nude or anything like that) just to get feedback and see how men react to you? You can do it anonymously and have thousands of men rate you. Maybe that would help you feel desirable.
2007-09-15 08:24:30 · answer #7 · answered by professor1777 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound majorly insecure...who cares what he thinks about your appearance? Asking your husband's friend will put him in an uncomfortable spot. And how if he thinks you're ugly? Do you really expect him to say "you're freaking hideous"?
I think what you need to address is-why do you rely so much on external validation?
2007-09-14 19:47:22 · answer #8 · answered by Ayla 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter what your intentions are - only the way your husband and his friend will perceive your intentions.
This is a GREAT way to put a strain on your marriage.
TELL you husband you NEED him to compliment you. Be straightforward and you'll probably get what you want.
2007-09-14 15:33:34 · answer #9 · answered by Roland'sMommy 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Personally, if you really need to hear it, ask your husband, let him know how much you need him to validate that. If he doesn't... then I would ask one of YOUR friends. I saw many people say it's inappropriate to even ask, I don't think that it is, but I wouldn't ask his friends, I'd ask your friends.
2007-09-14 17:05:21 · answer #10 · answered by mommylicious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋