Okay, I met this guy & we have a blast together, only he won't commit to a serious relationship, even tho neither of us have dated anyone else in the past 4 yrs. His cop out is that he tried involving someone else in his life (twice) & he doesn't feel it is fair to try again. I know, he is afraid of commintment, how do I break threw this barrior? I don't want to live alone forever, but I don't want to give him up either. I have never felt free enough to totally be myself with any other person before.
2007-09-14 14:49:28 · 7 answers · asked by pony 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you ever hear the song you don't know what you got till it's gone. I am not saying give him an ultimantium, but do make it clear that you are interested in a commited relationship, so you can't gurantee a year or even 6 months from now you'll still be around. You'll also find out his true feelings for you.
2007-09-14 14:58:47 · answer #1 · answered by ofsoundmind 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I acquired to a factor at round 25 whilst I determined to have a filter out and I took all my journals, and diaries and I burned all of them. Sort of such as you do on Bonfire Night. I acquired rid of the historic, to convey within the new. It used to be truthfully fairly fresh. I'm first-rate that I did this. I am forty years historic now. I've performed this style of factor, of eliminating the historic a couple of occasions when you consider that then. It rather does help in letting move of the beyond. If you believe it might be cathartic to be rid of those matters, then do it. You've appeared by way of them, learn, skilled once more, and regularly have a sense it is time to transfer on.
2016-09-05 14:41:05 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to push him into commitment. That never works. Don't be needy and insecure either. He will come around if you hold out long enough. Don't be in a rush. Take this time to really get to know each other. Because when you first know some one you are just seeing their Representative. Talk to him a lot and ask a lot of questions about his values, his interests and his plans for the future and tell him all of yours.
2007-09-14 15:14:35 · answer #3 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy needs a wake-up call. He's been involved with you for 4 years and he's still afraid to commit. The fact that he has been hurt before shouldn't have anything to do with you.
If you want a commitment and he doesn't, you're going to have to find someone who does.
You could try an ultimatum but that could backfire. It's up to you to decide if you want to live the way you've been living. If that works for you, keep doing what you've been doing. Good luck. I hope he sees the light before he loses you.
2007-09-14 15:00:38 · answer #4 · answered by katydid 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depending on circumstances, 4 years is more than enough time to decide. You can't convince them against their will. They have to decide for themselves. If you can wait around for that to happen, fine. If you can't wait around you should be honest with him about it and consider moving on.
2007-09-14 15:00:25 · answer #5 · answered by ozzman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you cant change him he has to be willing,but have you thought about why you feel free with him?because you know he not available so he cant hurt you.just find someone that love you now and trust them with your heart not someone that cant let go of the past.
2007-09-14 15:01:51 · answer #6 · answered by ldhotlipps 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has the right to his feelings, you can't force someone to feel for you the same as you feel for them. He doesn't want to committ...end of story.
2007-09-14 20:27:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋