I have had an abortion in the past and it was the worst thing I have done, it is a complicated story, and at the time there was a VERY valid reason for it. Now I'm in a very stressful situation, I know people don't believe in accidents, but gettin pregnant this time was an accident of sorts (my bf took the condom off mid sex - I truly didn't know).
I suffer from depression and I already have a 7 month old girl and a 22 month old boy. The thought of another one is too much to bear sometimes, especially as it's hard to motivate myself with 2 (which I do and I love them VERY much).
I am 12 weeks now, but by the time I have seen a doctor and got a hospital app, it will prob be another few weeks.
I hate this, what should I do??
2007-09-14 12:17:35 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Please...! Do not judge me! I have tried the pill, it makes my depression worse!
The 2 children I have were planned, so that is a completely different situation!
2007-09-14 13:16:42 · update #1
Dump your boyfriend ..he's clearly a selfish prick.
And stop having sex.
Don't get an abortion...give it up if you have to ...but don't have an abortion.
***
"The Pill" isn't the only form of birthcontrol out there. You could use sponges, diaphrams, IUD's, shots patches, abstinence...there are a million things outside of his control that you could use to protect yourself ...Several of which have little or no hormone so they should have no bearing on your depression. So you could better protect yourself. I'm not "judging you" I'm TELLING YOU.....
More importantly than your birth control issues...What's the deal with your boyfriend? That is totall BS to take it off half way through...obviously he only cares about himself and getting off...no concern what so ever about getting your pregnant or giving you a disease...Have you dumped him yet??
Please don't have an abortion.
2007-09-14 12:22:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 11⤊ 6⤋
I am very sorry to hear about your situation. You think that you may be taking the easy way out by having an abortion, but since you've already had one and had a hard time with it, you might be emotionally worse off. No one can tell you what to do, however I do not believe in abortion, but it is your choice, you also have the option to give up the baby for adoption. I have been in your shoes before and contemplated abortion the first time, I also suffer from depression, I think you may need to seek counseling of some sort. Do you have any family that will help you, or will your boyfriend be there for you, I think these will all be factors in your decision. I would get a piece of paper and weigh my pros and cons, and praying about it will never hurt. In the end it boils down to what you can live with. I wish you the best in whatever decision you decide to make.
2007-09-14 12:35:05 · answer #2 · answered by jo anna 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You're in a very tough situation. You say you've already had an abortion and it was the worst thing you've done. You're also depressed. Can you imagine, in your state of mind, would happen if you had an abortion? Right now, your hormones are really out of whack, and your mood swings are way out there. I would suggest you consider adoption. It's a great alternative, and there are many people out there who are unable to have children who would be terrific parents! With your state of mind and in your situation, I think an abortion at this point would be an immense guilt factor for you that you may never recover from.
2007-09-14 16:42:53 · answer #3 · answered by lordmisrule2004 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do not have another abortion. You were given this baby for a reason. If you don't think that you can handle a third child, give the baby up for adoption. There are so many people in the world who would love to have a baby of their own, including me. Give your baby a chance. Your baby could grow up and make a big difference in this crazy world. After you have the baby, please, get on birth control or get your tubes tied so you don't have to go through this again.
I hope everything works out for the best. Good luck.
2007-09-14 13:27:33 · answer #4 · answered by angelamc31 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW! look this is a really big issue here. But in the end you have to be honest with yourself. How will you feel after abortion? and also how will you feel if you dont have an abortion? can you be the best mom you can be to all your kids? personally i have a son and i think 1 or 2 children are enough already, I dont know how some mothers do it with 4 or 5. Anyways Picture yourself 3 years from now at least, and see how you would feel like and really forget about what people say. Dont listen to anyone but yourself, cause you're the one who is going to be raising that child not them!!! so make a choice now!! and what has happened has happened but this child will grow up and you cannot tell him he was an accident!! either choose to have him or chose to get an abortion and be the best mom you could be to the kids you already have.. Good luck my dear and trust yourself.
2007-09-14 12:46:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
pls don't get an abortion....it may have been a mistake, but the baby didn't know that and doesn't deserve to be terminated!!! pls either keep him/her or giver him up for adoption
ur baby at 12 wks:
Your baby's face is beginning to look more human, even though she is only about 2 inches/5.5cms long from her crown to her rump and weighs slightly less than half an ounce/ 14 grams. The eyes, which started out on the sides of the head, have moved closer together. The ears are almost in their normal position on the side of the head. The liver is making bile and the kidneys are secreting urine in the bladder.
The fetus squirms if your abdomen is prodded, although you cannot yet feel movement. Fetal nerve cells have been multiplying rapidly and synapses (neurological connections in your brain) are forming. The fetus has acquired more reflexes: touching the palms makes the fingers close, touching the soles of the feet makes the toes curl down and touching the eyelids makes the eye muscles clench
2007-09-14 12:36:03 · answer #6 · answered by *+*+baby dust*+*+ 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I work on the mother baby floor, and I cant tell you how MANY families are out there who would do anything to have a child. I dont think that you should go down the road of abortion, adotion is a HUGE option for you. It wont be easy, but you have to know that you are doing whats best for the child and making a families dream come true!! You can look up adoption agencies in your area and they will help you with everything. They have a group of social workers that will work with you and your family. They will make everything easy for you and you are in control. However this decision is up to you, but just know that there are options....and TONS of support for you!!! :)
2007-09-14 13:20:34 · answer #7 · answered by Meghan L 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever heard of ADOPTION?? Why is it that when some women have an unplanned pregnancy, they want to resort to abortion? Why don't you have the child, and give it to a family that will love that child? There are people out there that would love to have children, but can't have any. Why won't you let your child have a chance at life? And if your first abortion was the worst thing you've ever done, why would you want to do that again? Give the child up for adoption, instead of murdering your child ... AGAIN.
2007-09-14 14:19:45 · answer #8 · answered by ♥Shania♥ 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
try adoption, not saying abortion is bad when you get rapedor have a disease that will terminate the life. but if you truley donot want another child adopt. the soon to be parents could be very helpful and understanding to your needs. the boyfriend. well he be gone. no he should not have done that to you and you should have been a little more careful yourself. sex is a two way street and he was not the active person in the room. this means that your youngest child was only four months old at the time and you seem to have forgotten how that happens. good luck and no to abortion on this pregnacy
2007-09-14 12:28:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well your boyfriend is a real jerk and if he had unprotected sex with you and you didn't even know then you should never see him again. If having an abortion is the worst thing you ever did why would you do it again. I'm 11 weeks pregnant and just saw my baby on ultasound. It's a good size, and I got to see all the body parts. My baby had his/her hands to it's mouth and was moving. I can't imagine how anyone could kill it. If you can't take care of the baby, then give him/her to a couple who isn't as lucky as you and will love the baby and give him/her a good home.
2007-09-14 12:29:32 · answer #10 · answered by Melissa 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Ditch the boyfriend!
Don't kill the baby!
Put it up for adoption!
Find a real man not the pig you have now and get married and have a nice happily ever after!
... and if you and your husband want to wait to have kids remember World Health Org puts the condom at about 95% effective!.... 1 in 20! But to get pregnant you have to have it fail at the right time so the odds are probably about 1 in 50.
May God Bless
Todd
2007-09-14 12:42:39 · answer #11 · answered by Pilgrim in the land of the lost 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋