2007-09-14 09:49:31 · 12 answers · asked by Linz ♥ VT 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
No you dont lose yourself you adapt to new things and become a much better person with a very busy and full life.
2007-09-14 09:55:03 · answer #1 · answered by Aloha_Ann 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not think so. I thing you struggle to regain the Independence that you once had before you had children and you keep redefining yourself each year.
Maturity hit us in unexpected ways,but in our hearts we still feel like that 17 year old girl.
My advice find time for yourself if your kids are little put a movie on and tell them you would be in your room reading a book if there is a situation you are tired off ..put your self in time out and let them deal with it for a while ...I also adore my tea time a moment of calm in the day with a cup of te and nobody is allow to disturb until I'm done with my tea....
I have 5 children and I know how overwhelming can be at some times...but your peace and serenity come first.
2007-09-14 10:16:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Linz! Are you thinking about having kids? My son just turned one so I can maybe help you out with this one.
As a father, kindof. I lost a lot of selfish things like being intimate with my wife on a very regular basis, or being the center of her attention. In fact, I felt totally ignored, and almost pushed for a divorce. I simply didn't know any better. Be mindful of this when you interact with your husband/lover.
From the woman's side of the coin I would say yes, you totally lose yourself. My wife lost all interest in her job, previous social life, and entertainment. Our baby is her entire world. She is always feeding him (breastmilk), putting him to sleep, and playing with him. Of course I interact with him like this as well, but she, due to hormones and such, she is hard-wired into being there ALL the time. She needs breaks from it a lot because she gets so overwhelmed.
She also ditched her old friends and now only hangs out with other mothers that have children of the same age. Our single friends predicted this, but at the time we thought they were full of crap. We would always hang out, right?
Hope I helped, and congratz if you are having a child, it is awesome!
2007-09-14 10:24:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not say you loose yourself when you have kids. You may find out that you are stronger than you thought you were. You go through a process where everything is new and you may feel like you don't want to fail. You have to focus on someone else that totally depend on you for everything and it just doesn't leave the time you had before the kids started coming. You can still be you and maintain you, you just have to share and manage your time wiser.
2007-09-14 10:19:02 · answer #4 · answered by flirty30 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if you have a poorly-developed sense of self. Otherwise, the experience of parenthood doesn't take away from you. Instead, it brings out some of the best aspects of you that you might not even have known were there. It's sometimes challenging and frustrating being a parent but it's also rewarding in such a profound way it's impossible to really describe.
2007-09-14 10:08:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You do lose a portion of yourself. I can no longer pubcrawl, stay out until all hours of the morning, or spontaneously hop in the car and take off for the weekend.
While I do miss some of those on occasion, the benefits of being a dad far outweigh them. :)
2007-09-14 09:57:31 · answer #6 · answered by Armless Joe, Bipedal Foe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is just the opposite. I believe that you FIND yourself after having children. I was a party girl before having my 2 monkies, and now my son is 3 and my little girl is 18mos. I am very involved in their development, and I thank God for them everyday! Of course there are days thatI wonder where they came from, and who raised them, but at the end of the day, I made 2 perfect little people. No one can ever take that away from you!
2007-09-14 09:56:28 · answer #7 · answered by NayaJ69 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You aren't going to completely be able to lose yourself, but after the kiddies are sleep take some time to yourself!
That's works for me!
2007-09-14 10:18:34 · answer #8 · answered by Sassy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you don't lose yourself but you do have a little more responsibility so you just have to learn how to manage your time better.
But raising kids is definitely a full-time job.
2007-09-14 09:55:07 · answer #9 · answered by HeavenlyBliss 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you will also lose the kids, the dog, the cat, the husband...from time to time...at first, you will worry alot.
2007-09-14 10:32:56 · answer #10 · answered by TD Euwaite? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋