Okay this is yet again the problem. he has decided to leave me cuz his "hearts over there" but my feeling is that he is just doing this cuz he wants to be there for his kid not the mama..even though we are married i feel like he can still be with me and take care of the child?! what can i do? i try to be supportive but at the same time i dont wanna lose him im trying to be strong and we have been trying to have a kid since we were married 8 mo ago and still no preggo here and it makes me feel like im being punished that he is leaving me for her cuz they have a kid and i dont? should i feel this way what is going on in the world why do i have to suffer? and yet he still also tells me I still love you and im not going to file for the divorce unless i know for sure it works out with me and her and if not then i wanna take our time n gettin back together what the heck does this mean for me? should i charge him for bills even if he wont live with me since he left me whil e i am unemploye
2007-09-14 05:16:05 · 14 answers · asked by mrandmrsmedina07 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
all im saying is i want a child i dont want him getting the best of me or her i believe he wont be with her long cuz they never worked out along time ago anyways but yet again you are all right im not a doormat but of course there is the thing im not that beautfiul either im 24 a lil overweight and i have my pic on my profile but as u can tell from it im not that pretty.
2007-09-14 05:29:04 · update #1
Divorce him!!!!
2007-09-14 05:22:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen. You need to divorce this man now, while you have no children together. How dare him say that he won't file for divorce, until he's sure about another relationship. What he means is that he's going to try and work it out with his baby-mama. If that doesn't work, he's going to look around for someone else (which is why he says he wants to "take our time" in getting back together). To put it plainly--and I'm not trying to hurt you, this man doesn't love you. Doesn't mean you're not worthy of being loved, he's just not the one.
If you continue in this marriage, you will be making a mistake. You can't lose what you don't have, and you don't have his love. Be wise and let him go. If you can move out of the apartment, you need to do so. Move back with your parents until you can get on your feet, if that's possible. Seriously. This man is going to break your heart. Let him go.
2007-09-14 12:32:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is just keeping you waiting in the wings while he goes off and does what he wants to do. What kind of crap is that - if we don't work out I'll come back to you, but give me time. You need to stop being a doormat for him. Make up his mind for him. File for divorce and find a man that loves you for you, not because you just happen to be there waiting in the wings. Respect yourself and move on. He's not worth waiting for.
2007-09-14 12:21:25 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to get over him. Your his 2nd place...if this one dont work ouut i will come to you.......until the next girl comes around. Read your letter what would you tell this person ? he is not going to "her" for the kid...He is doing it for him. He will tell you he loves you but only a fool would believe him. Did you see the part when you said HE LEFT ME. Take a hint...GET AWAY if you stay you are a fool and you will hurt even more later. HE IS NOT COMINg BACK TO YOU. If he does...you are 2nd place he will find another and do this to you again. DO NOT HAVE HIS KID you cant make him stay that way. Grow up it is OVER go live your life
2007-09-14 13:21:20 · answer #4 · answered by recon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never put yourself in the position to where you can not take support your on self first off (I use to take so much out of my ex's check a week because he would not let me work and keep it hidden....I learn't my lesson with buttholes like that..hehehe) You would also be crazy to take him back if it does not work out with the babys mom. Either he wants to be with you or he dosen't. Unless your willing to share and I don't think you are...go find you a job and tell him to F**K off!! You can always try for alimony and help with the bills in your divorce settlement.
2007-09-14 12:28:22 · answer #5 · answered by ryeeeeit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be thankfull you are not preganant Stop waiteing for him to make up his mind Do know what you want go to school find a job and a place you can afford Cut your ties from him for a while let him feel what it is like get your life together and never waite around for a guy who can not decide who they want to be with The nerve of him please waite till I see if it will work out with the babies mamma You are not sloppy seconds and he needs to relize that quick
2007-09-14 12:30:13 · answer #6 · answered by chameleon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, if he is leaving let him go. You should not be treated this way. Thank god you did not have a child with this man. He is very immature and selfish.
I would divorce him and move on with my life. He seems to want both of you
Please take care of yourself and let him go. Good Luck!
2007-09-14 12:31:14 · answer #7 · answered by Tadpoler 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun, drop him like a bad habit. He's not mature enough to take up your time. Focus on either finding work or getting and education, but by all means, get rid of him.
2007-09-14 12:33:01 · answer #8 · answered by Steve F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does the phrase "having your cake and eating it too" ring a bell?
Let him go. He wants the best of both worlds. Walk away and don't look back.
You will find a good man, the right man for you!!
2007-09-14 12:20:40 · answer #9 · answered by Deb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let him GO .. he sound like he need to make up his mind and stop hurting you .. and i know the need of a baby in the realtionship seems like a fix it tool but it is not... Just Love your self and future children .. and Let him go find out what he wants .. if its you, he will come back and not look back .
good Luck
2007-09-14 12:27:14 · answer #10 · answered by della 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cut your losses...this man is still in love with his "baby's mama"....you were just a distraction, and he used you.
Get out before you end up pregnant and alone.
no woman should have to "wait" for a man to make up his mind, and no woman should ever have to be the "second choice".
You should think more of yourself than that sweetie.
2007-09-14 12:24:10 · answer #11 · answered by simmychick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋