When i was about 14, i went through a stage where i would have days where i felt at an all time low, and would cry and cry and days where i felt a little better. I think this was due to the fact i was bullied a bit at 14 in school and i felt there was no way out, cause the teachers were not doing anything about it.
When i was 15 and 16 and in my last two years of school, my confidence grew a little bit, and i just tryed to get through the day and enjoy having my friends around me and such.
Recently, I've joined College, and im not enjoying it at the moment. I don't fit in with the other people on my course and my confidence has hit rock bottom again. I feel really low all the time im there and i just can't talk to new people cause i think they will probably find me boring. Cause i have no confidence, Im too shy to talk to anyone.
I've been there just 2 weeks and im already considering leaving, i won't know what else to do. Why do i feel like this, should i go to the doc?
2007-09-14 04:49:15 · 8 answers · asked by annoymous 1 in Health ➔ General Health Care ➔ Other - General Health Care
i am starting university next week, and I am really scared about the same things. The fact is, if one person thinks u are boring, they next will find you fascinating- and you will never know unless you try! It takes time to make friends at uni, and the relationship will not be as good as with your high school friends at first! But give it time and you wont regret it! Dont leave, because the outside world wont be much different.. accept who you are, make new friends , and learn everlasting lessons about life- and i am ot speaking abut ur course!
2007-09-14 04:59:40 · answer #1 · answered by Maryanni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The doctor is one option you can consider. I would think that from a medical point of view - since the lows have a direct impact on the way you go about your daily business - you may be diagnosed with depression.
In most cases, an M.D will prescribe you some variant of an SSRI that will strive to balance everything out (in terms of neuro-chemicals). Although some medications work better for some people than others, you will likely have try out one or two different medications before finding one that works well for you.
Medicine aside, it sounds like you are perfectly normal - most people have a difficult time adjusting to a new enviroment. To help boost your confidence - try joining some form of social group or a club that has something that appeals to you.
Recent studies have also shown that exercise (primarily aerobic) can also help get you through low periods. So.. if you do not currently work out - you may give it a shot. Not only does it make you feel better physiologically, but it also helps you with confidence.
With all this said, I would continue and stick out school for the remaining of the semester. Who knows, you may just end up loving it. If the down time continues to bother you, speak to a physician and see what they tell you. Although medication is one option - keep in mind that there are always alternatives (such as exercise etc.) that may be equally beneficial.
Enjoy the weekend!
2007-09-14 04:54:47 · answer #2 · answered by bmwest 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I can really relate to this. I too was bullied but at a younger age in primary school. It really destroyed my confidence and turned me into an extremely shy person.
For several years, I just couldn't meet or talk to new people because I thought they would laugh at me or ridicule me like they did when I was a kid.
Anyway, in secondary school it got a bit better but I was still chronically shy. I went to university and literally met NOBODY. I was that shy. It was the most lonely ten weeks of my life.
So I left, and I do not regret it as I then went travelling and my confidence really grew. I am still shy but not so it hinders my life.
There are things that can help you. For me affirmations really helped a lot. This is where you repeat a phrase in your head like "I am a decent, unique person and I have the right to express myself etc etc.Even though you don't believe it you keep saying these phrases in your head and eventually your brain rewires so you do believe it. You will find loads of info on google about this. Just type "Overcoming shyness" and there are so many useful exercises you can do.
If you can afford it a psychiatrist will defo help - a course of cognitive therapy would do wonders.
You are starting a journey, make it your mission to become confident and to love yourself again. Make it a game, a challenge, and this will bring a lightness to it.
My journey was fascinating. As I progressed I felt like I was blossoming to a butterfly. At times, I felt defeated, like I was getting nowhere but in time you will get there.
The best of luck to you, I really feel your pain but you must believe your life can change. I am a living example of that.
2007-09-14 05:02:03 · answer #3 · answered by abluebobcat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feeling low, lack of confidence, facing a new and stressful situation, withdrawing from people, not able to find enjoyment in the moments.........and being a female dealing with the menstrual cycle........
Sure sounds a lot like depression + hormones.
Given that it started at age 14 (usually the most difficult year for teen girls) your hormones could play a part of the problem.
Don't give-up yet. See the Dr. and talk with a counselor at the guidance or counselors office before making major decisions.
Hang in there girl. You can do this.
2007-09-14 05:04:46 · answer #4 · answered by Hope 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you know people at college will find you boring unless you talk to them? You are assuming people won't like you most likely because of the bullies when you were 14, they damaged your self esteem. You may surprise yourself that people will like you! You can't predict the future, it hasn't happened yet! You couldn't be that boring, or you wouldn't have had these good friends at 15 and 16. Just give it a go, if you are worried about what to say to people, ask them about themselves, everyone loves to talk about themselves! You went to college to learn new things, not just to meet new people so why would you leave? If you leave college now you will only find yourself in the same situation in all areas of your life! Give it a go, you might just surprise yourself!
2007-09-14 05:07:26 · answer #5 · answered by Purple 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me i feel like this alot. You really shouldn't consider leaving college because it is your future. But see how u will be for a few more weeks and if you don't feel any better you will have to go and see the doc. Good luck. x
2007-09-14 05:10:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes you need to go to the doctors but as well you need to get some councelling regarding confidence and assertiveness - sometimes when people are depressed they dont realise what theyre feeling is normal ie your insecurity at being at a new place, meeting new people etc, hope you feel better soon though. xx
2007-09-14 04:59:45 · answer #7 · answered by kipper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't panic, your still young, i would recommend see a counsellor, you seem to know, how and when the problem started. it might be good just talk to them. whatever you do, don't do drugs to overcome it, it'll only make things worse. Good luck and all the best.
2007-09-14 05:00:12 · answer #8 · answered by kieron f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋