How do you motivate yourself to do what you need/want to do while depressed/not feeling like doing “work”?

Question

Depression for me = having trouble taking a shower and doing anything other than taking care of my children and reading, playing on computer, watching TV, etc. Please serious responses only – I’m not lazy and not making excuses, just wanting to learn how others get through this. Yes, I have had/am having therapy, am sometimes on meds when advised to do so and can afford it…no, nothing has worked long-term so far. So how do you accomplish more when you’re in this kind of spot? Creativity and/or unusual “solutions” much appreciated.

Answer 1

Choose one thing and totally commit yourself to completing the task! When you have finished pat yourself on the back for a job well done!* Then proceed to the next task ! Good Luck!

Answer 2

I really wish I could help you, as you have helped me before (from a previous question you answered). But I can't. I am right where you are with this one. I don't much "feel" like doing anything. The depression is gripping to say the least. I love my family. My husband and daughter are very patient, as it would seem. I know I must drive them nuts at times, but truth is, I couldn't make it without them. I make sure my family has clean clothes. I make sure the shopping is done so we have food on the table. I help my daughter with her homework when she needs my help. I'm always making sure she has what she needs from me emotionally. When it comes to my husband, I guess you could say I am a bit emotionally blocked (but that's a whole different story). I wouldn't say I have the cleanest house. For my liking it is probably the exact opposite. I don't mean it's filthy, just horribly cluttered. And as I look around I think to myself, where do I start? I often wonder when I allowed to let things get so out of hand. I'm surely not being a great role model to my daughter when it comes to cleanliness. But she seems to be so much better than me. She keeps her room clean, for the most part. She is always taking care of herself. Sometimes I think I could learn a few things from her on that. And she's only 10 (11 in October). I pretty much started on this downward spiral, I think, when I got injured on the job (lower back). That was in 2001. Our finances took a dive and haven't recovered since. I must admit I am great at budgeting, one thing I always did take pride in. But you can't budget what you don't have. Once I found out I was diabetic AND pregnant all at the same time, I pretty much ceased to do even the little things I was doing, besides cleaning the clothes and shopping. I'm 41, and that's why this pregnancy has me worried. I've been told it's high risk. Having diabetes is just a slap on top of it all. So, on that note (because I am rattling on again), I will say this: I'm sorry I can't help you, but at least know you are not alone. And judging by some answers, it makes me feel good to know I am not alone either. I wish you well.

Answer 3

could it be that you need to switch medications?
I bought some yellow (yellow is an uplifting and creative color) lined pads at the office supply, and just before I go to sleep at night I make a list of all the things I need to do the next day. That day I check them off one by one. And then I remind myself that if I don't get them done that day then I'd have to do those plus other things the following day. So, rather than be overburdened I get most of the things done from the list. Some people start with the more difficult tasks, others start with the simpler tasks...is up to you, whichever motivates you. I've also found that "motivational" versus or comments inspire me and keep me going. You can find a lot of those on the internet and said by many people. Every once in a while I pay for a seminar which is a one day motivational day for office workers (which includes a lunch). It's a great get-away, you meet people and improve yourself too.

Make a list of things you want to learn, things you're interested in and would like to research, travel places you'd like to see....and continue your list adding new things to that list. then when you're on the internet do the research...you could print out things of interest and make a booklet, you can do scrapbooking, genealogy research, artwork, maybe a book club, seeds and plants, sewing projects, cooking and trying new recipes, making things for the children like popsicles, wiggle jello, popcorn balls, rice krispie squares, and even things like playdough, you can make vases for fun with painters tape and shoepolish, purses with quilted material, fingerpaintings, greeting cards, things that interest all of you.

Answer 4

Your story doesnt give enough details to give perfect advice. Because you are taking care of your kids and you are seeing a therapist the therapist sees you as fit enough to care for the kids which is good.

When you say "having trouble taking a shower" that can mean quite a few things, it could mean you need more excersize. It sounds like you are not doing much as far as activities go that are outdoors. Try just taking a walk outside with your kids or taking them to a park instead of just having indoor activities. Try taking your kids to a library and being there could help you read more too. Try those two for starters.

Answer 5

I'm was in the same boat as you ages ago. I may not look depressed, but inside I was...just thoughts running through my mind that's hard to turn off...but as you know, what motivates me is my family and that's what part of life's about... your home is where the heart is... I have learned that if your home is not clean, it's how your life is......my mom told me all my life, and after I had my first child, I realized what she meant...as you know, after you have kids; they come before you...your kids needs you as a role model to them, if you don't help them, who will??? They need you as much as you need them..there's so much to do with them, go to the park, for a walk, ride bike, play games together, movie etc...so much activity to do and i'm sure going to therapy isn't the answer...your answer is where the heart is and is with your family and that's what's important...I also realized that if I didn't have a husband or kids to come home to, I wouldn't know what to do with my life...sure would be very lonely; but I know, i'm the richest women in the world to know that I have a family, w/o them I would be nothing...Your family should be your first priority in your life...know that and I hope all goes well for you, Please take care of what you have and don't think of being depressed, cause it'll only kill you at the end....look on the bright side, it'll only get better if you make it happen and only you can decide how to live your life...Good luck, get back to me and let me know how your doing??? Take care

Answer 6

i know exactly how you feel

i am kind of going thru this now because my life has been hard at points and i am going thru a miscarriage

well, what helps me quite cheaply is taking ginseng pills with food in the morning (irwin naturals triple boost or energy pills are great)

in the evening, right before i go to bed, i have half a capful of cheap apple cider vinegar - it really helps you sleep better, trust me...it has helped everyone i told to do it

i drink a cup of water after the vinegar and i use the cheap 59 cent grocery store kind of apple cider vinegar (the organic kind you buy online or at the health food store has more benefits but to get the minimum like sleeping well and removing aches and pains i use the grocery store brand)

i go walking when it is nice and cool (hot here)

but what really motivates me to work is thinking about all the people who can't and all those who make sacrifices

last night i watched an HBO documentary called Alive Day Memories or something like that

to see such young people have lost limbs and lifestyles due to IEDs and such and still struggle forward through their physical and emotional pain, as well as psychological difficulties makes you appreciate your life and want to do much more

in fact, anything about such people or people dying and still living with courage or any people worldwide living in dire circumstances but just giving it a go is a motivator for me

BE CAREFUL THOUGH

if you are really in a crying or a "break down" moment this might make you MORE depressed

but to see people keep trying when they really have every reason just to give up and perhaps kill themselves is usually empowering, at least minimally

to quote one of the survivors of the doc, "inch by inch, its a cinch"

and it is true...in AA (i read a lot about this as self help, though I can't drink at all and never really have!) they call it one day at a time

if you are feeling depressed, do whatever you have to do bit by bit...don't try to tackle everything at once...fold a bit, do laundry a bit, do your paperwork (i actually have a lot at my job) bit by bit each day...

i mean you can finish stuff in one day, but just go step by step and don't be afraid of stopping and doing something else and going back to something

this is what gets me through

have a good day

Answer 7

Start with the small things first. Don't take on the harder things or more stressful things. If you get through a small task, you feel accomplished and may be motivated to complete others.

That's the approach I use when I have a lot to do and am not in the mood...

Answer 8

What helps me when I feel like you do is to make plans with friends or family. Ask them to help you by going out for walk after work or a bicycle ride. Physical activity will help you recharge. And also make one long-term plan: Talk to your husband about your next vacation or fun trip or activity. Talking and thinking about good things ahead will help motivate you..

Also, writing in a journal or blog is helpful. Sometimes when you feel low, it may be because underneath you are sad or angry about something. As you write how you feel, more of what's inside will come out. Getting it written down helps work through the feelings and releases the pent up energy.

The energy is there inside you but locked up in bad feelings like fear, sadness and anger. You can get it out with expressing it (writing, art), physical activity (a friend will help you get started). Also counter the bad feelings with good thoughts and wishes and things to look forward to.

Answer 9

i have been there myself raising my 2 children and was home all the time. what worked for me is exercising. i would get up and hour early, or go out in the evening after dinner was made and the kids was asleep, and my husband was home, and go for a 30 min walk. i also bought home work out video's and did them with the kids. did wonders for me.

Answer 10

Set yourself small tasks - get up have a shower & make breakfast. Then after that set yourself another small reasonble task. Don't expect too much of yourself too soon. All the best hun X.