First time I met her she threw herself all over him, made no attempt to talk to me, wouldn't let him talk to me! He quit talking to her after that, next meeting I went to the washroom, she rubbed herself all over him, saying "don't worry, your gf can't see", recently tried to add him to facebook - he declined so she added all his male friends and is constantly writing him emails. He told her to fix it with me first - I don't need her in my life, especially with a child on the way! How to deal?? I wrote the following email - will it work? Other ideas?
2007-09-13 08:39:49 · 23 answers · asked by Betty 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
We are extremely happy with our lives right now, everything is fantastic! There is nothing you could possibly offer (bf) to make his life any better, I am taking care of things just fine.
I refuse to lower my morals and values by giving you the opportunity to bring your drama and the negativity attached to it back into our lives. Please go elsewhere for the attention you are so desperately seeking - you should never and will never come first in my boyfriends life, especially after everything you have done to try and destroy his happiness(me).
Not sure if you realize this, but you can not con, manipulate, or guilt someone into being friends with you... shaking your **** and *** in their face and dry humping them like a dog in heat really doesn't work either. Your act is getting really old, maybe it's time you tried something new.
2007-09-13 08:40:24 · update #1
Being happy with your man is good enough.......Let her pine until she meets her Mr. right esp. if your is Mr. Faithful.
First of all she wins the game when you react to her.....do what your mom would say if it was your little sister driving you mad.....Ignore her and she will stop it.......she only does it because she knows that it bothers you......Good luck.
2007-09-13 08:53:59 · answer #1 · answered by Been There Done That 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like your boyfriend is very soft, and doesn't know how to stand up for himself or you. If he were a strong person, he would have nipped this in the bud a long time ago, and the trashy female friend not be a problem. Sending her an email is not the answer, your boyfriend needs to grow some balls, and put this girl in her place once and for all. You cannot put an end to this, HE HAS TO BE A MAN AND DO IT HIMSELF. Good luck, because until he settles it she will constantly be a menace to you, and that is not good especially now that you are pregnant
2007-09-13 15:48:23 · answer #2 · answered by pookster4262 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you are angry but in my humble opinion you are giving too much power to this woman. What's important is your b/f's reaction, not hers. If you are a smart girl you will simply laugh off her behavior and ignore her. If she doesn't get a reaction, she eventually move on.
Don't send that email, don't talk to her, never ever take a call or IM and don't respond to texting, emails or anything else. Never include her in gatherings, in fact make it a point to have friends over, not invite her and make sure that you very quietly make it known that her behavior makes you embarrassed for her and you just can't see anyone do that to themselves. This is called shunning and it works and you come out looking like the better person.
And by all means, trust your b/f if you have no reason not to, don't nag him about it and don't talk about her in negativity's, but just in sadness "its sad that someone could be so desperate", that sort of thing.
And keep him close to you and you close to him. Make sure he is happy and coming home to his family is his number one priority. When you can get married, do so. Congrats on the baby!
2007-09-13 15:53:05 · answer #3 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Good email but I would recommend cutting out the first paragraph-and start with the second paragraph.
Also, if you want it to have a much more profound effect I would have your boyfriend send it as if he was the one that wrote it.
I have a strong disregard for people like this but I am sure we all have encountered this at one time or another somewhere in our lives.
2007-09-13 15:53:57 · answer #4 · answered by beensiecat 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you.You don,t invite this type of company around your home or give them any oppurtunity they may try to get from you or him.She sounds like a s&#t and needed to be put in her place.I had this similiar problem with my son,s friends mother.She came over one day to get her son while my boy friend was at home and sat and talked to us with out flirting, but seemed like a bum.But now her son no longer comes to play with my son,so now she no longer has the oppurtunity.But out of respect I would not allow her back over either, cause that is disrespectful.And it don,t matter rather you 2 are not married or not, cause you are sleeping and living together.Out of respect you don,t try to flirt with men who are sleeping and living with some one else rather they are married or not.Cause there are alot of other men who are more available.She must be really hard up to wan,t to be with some one that has a woman and child on the way.She must not have that many options to be with a man who is available.But I would go with what Newattitude said and not give her any attention or even communicate with her in no means unless she shows up at your door or what ever.You need to resolve it so that she don,t have any reason to be at your door .If she does show up tell her that you 2 are busy right now with out explaining any thing shut the door in her face.Cause it is your home and you need to make disrespectful people like her unwelcomed to come back.And he needs to realize that too or leave him if he rather choose a dirt bag like that over you .Good luck and best wishes.
2007-09-13 22:58:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go girl!!! It was down to the point, aggressive but still classy!! You will always have haters especially when a B**** sees you are happy or you have something that they want or not even want, they just want to see you miserable. Continue to be a lady it will only make her look and feel stupid. And hopefully soon she will give up. And if she don't, pop your collar cus you have something she wants on lock! Good Luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-09-13 16:07:57 · answer #6 · answered by Tanesia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ROFL!!!!!!! Hopefully this will do the trick and you and your bf can get on with your lives and concentrate on the important things...yourselves and your baby. I hope your bf will soon be your husband. If this doesn't do the trick, your bf needs to completely block her from emails, phone calls etc. Ultimately it is up to your man how this thing will play out.
Good luck
2007-09-13 15:54:01 · answer #7 · answered by just me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your guy needs new friends. Send it... and then be done with it. You have a child on the way and much bigger things to be concerned with.
Married or not she should have respect for you as his (PREGNANT) girlfriend and know better...
2007-09-13 16:04:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't get in contact with her at all. It won't work.
It would just give her more attention and ammunition to hurt you with. That would give her too much importance and power over you and your relationship. It sounds like your man is very committed to you. Let him handle this fight. She digs your man and wants him because she sees him as fair game. As long as he doesn't reciprocate, you don't have any problems.
Don't give her any more thought than you have to. Treat her like the garbage in the gutter that she is.
2007-09-13 15:54:03 · answer #9 · answered by Benji's Mommy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl, that is the oldest flirtation attitude thats been around for years. Apparently she is hard up. Look, don't stress yourself out about that mess, your baby need to be happy, not stress over some little "HO". Be free of this. Get on his ASSSSSSSSSSS, he can put a stop to it if he want.
2007-09-13 15:48:14 · answer #10 · answered by askme 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋