I have a cheating husband, pls help.?

Question

My husband keeps cheating every now and then, i'm begining to consider divorce, cos cheating back on him would only hurt me, he's asking for a lst chance, but i know a leopard can never change it's skin, does anyone have an idea how to help him stop if he is true to his words this time around. pls dont tell me about being good to him cos that is all i've done in the last 4years. he is the one that has a problem.

Answer 1

the thing is, if u do decide to go back with him, it will always haunt u. u can forgive , but u can never forget.

be realistic withur self, if u love urself, u wont let a man treat u this way. honey, u need someone that will love, cherish and respect u. do you really believe he will be able to provide this for u?
♀♥♂

Answer 2

Do not even think about staying with him. If he had done it once and you wanted to stay and make it work I would have said for you to try. Every now and then? Wake up girl. Do you realize the risk he is putting you in? There are a lot of STD that he could be giving you. Not everything is curable. You cannot make him stop. He sounds like a habitual offender so he will not change. Cut your losses and find a man who will treat you as you deserve to be treated. Do not believe his bs because if he cared he would not have done it and he would not have kept doing it. It is time to take care of you. Run and don't look back. If you stay he will continue to cheat because you allow it. Since it happens every now and then and you know about it sounds like he does not even try to hide it. Get a divorce and go to the doctor to get checked out. Wish you the best.

Answer 3

Listen to me. You did nothing wrong. He is abusive to you in many, many ways. Cheating is just another way that he has chosen to hurt you. You can not let him get away with hurting you any longer. You have hung in there longer than most women would have, and now the marriage is irretrievably broken. You have to leave him, and re-build your life. 44 is not that old. There is still plenty of time to try again to find a good man who will give you the affection and fidelity that you deserve. But first, I recommend that you take some time for you. Leave, get some therapy, and hire a very good divorce attorney to make sure that you are treated fairly in court. Take up a new hobby, make some new friends, and take some classes at the local college. Get to know and like yourself once again. Remember, living well is the best revenge. Good luck to you.

Answer 4

I know most people will tell you to leave this man, for your sake. But, sounds as if this is the first time he is feeling responsible and is asking for a 1st chance to show you he wants to change. I had a friend whose husband was this way; he was brought up to think cheating was a mans right. It took time, healing and both of them working together to forgive - he-himself; she-all the cheating, but they are very happy and have made a wonderful marriage that both can be proud of.
He cheats for a reason and he needs to find out why he needs this extra boast to give him validation. I do suggest he go into counseling to deal with this issue first, and they you both can go to counseling should he be able to show he wants your marriage to work. My husband cheated and he changed his spots, so that saying is another cliche'.

He must look within himself for the answers and, once found, show you in every way that he will go forward a loyal, truthful and faithful spouse. Good luck to you both!

Answer 5

You should have left the first time! He does not respect you so he does not deserve your respect. I know its is hard but you cannot let him walk all over you. If a man strays then the man must pay! You should have a bit more self respect and not let him treat you this way.And NO he wont change, he cant. He already knows that he can still keep you nomatter what he does so there will always be a next time unless you show him the door. You can find someone who is worth giving your love to, and someone who might actually love you back. Good Luck

Answer 6

i was in the same boat as u, so please listen to me when i say, there are an endless list of times when my ex told me 'one last chance please to let me make it up to you and show u what u mean to me'

i bet u have heard this before right??

well please dont fall for this. u are wasting your time. if ur hubby decides to stop cheating for a wile then thats all it will be, ''a wile''

he will eventually get bored of sittin in tryin to play happy families when he would much rather be out cheating, im sorry if i sound cruel. its just i get so angry wen women consider givin men a 2nd, 3rd 4th 5th etc chance when i can tell u that they will never change. u have said this urself. u just want someone to give u a reason to give him another chance

u are worth more than that, if only u could see that. why wreck ur head every night wondering where he is, who he is with, and the constant arguments. i have been there, done that, the same as u. and i eventually realised that i was been takin for a fool.

let go, get single, get ur self out there and see the difference u feel when u know u can enjoy urself with out the worries of him. it will hurt at the start as he will be in ur mind all the time. but sooner or later u will pat yourself on the back and wonder why didnt i do this sooner. it will build your confidence back up, and your social skills.

if he does it once, he will most certainly do it again. maybe if u do get rid of him he will realise what he has lost, and how stupid he was in the 1st place. he may even come looking for u back, like my ex did, but i was enjoyin myself too much and i wasnt gettin back into that story again with him.

what ever u do, good luck

Answer 7

Hi there;
You are going to get a bunch of people on here who are going to rant and rave and say get rid of him he is no good if he is doing this to you. Disregard those people, the message may be OK but the delivery is bad. You need to decide at this point, is it better to be with him cheating on you or better to be on your own. If you are strong enough and ready to be on your own, do it. If you are not ready for that and you can handle being in the relationship still then you need until you are ready to deal with it. I would never assume that you treat him bad, cheaters cheat because they have no concerns, not because they are treated bad. You just have to remember...your self worth is more important than anything, if he makes you feel bad and there are more bad times than good, you really need to evaluate your relationship. Good luck.

Answer 8

Sit down with him and try to figure out why he is cheating. Than put a really tight lease on everything that he does where he goes and everyhting of that nature. If that don't work than leave.
My husband cheated on me and I threaten to take the kids and leave him. Now he tells me every where he goes and gives me a time when he will be home. I also have him timed and numbers where he goes to check on him.

Answer 9

I would go ahead and move on once a cheater always a cheater look how many times he said it would be his last time doing it and it happens again repeatedly...so I question whether or not he really cares about you at all or is just comfortable with you being around and he knows you will take him back because you have done it before...Hope this helps..Feel free to email me if you ever need any more advice.

Answer 10

I think you will have to accept him as he is and let him cheat occasionally. He hasn't left you for another woman, nor threatened to leave you. He has just slept with other women and then come back to you. You cannot change him into someone that he isn't.

How about asking him about the other women, what they are like and what he has done with them? Maybe ask for occasional threesomes (easy if you're a woman)? Also play on his fantasy. Try dressing up and play-acting as another woman, a schoolchild, a hooker or a governess for instance.