Do u think I have post natal depresion?

Question

I have a 15 month old girl, who is lovely. I have been crying alot for no particular reason, mainly in secret. I have a loving husband, but lately I just havent been into him. I dont feel like sex, and I have even started sleeping under a separate doona to him in the same bed. He knows somethings up. When he asks I say 'nothing, Im fine' bocs I cant pinpoint whats wrong. My husbands english, Im australian, we live in aust, but I hardly visit my family who live a few hours away. Next year we plan on going to england for a few years. It was mainly my decision to do it. My family think it was my husbands idea, and think 'he's trying to keep me away from them'. The situation sucks. I feel if I was 'myself', or how I used to be b4 the baby, I would have laughed it all off. But I cant seem to and everything keeps getting worse. Sometimes I just want things to be how they were a few years ago ... single, no child. I feel like I have nothing and I'm nobody. I dont know what to do.

I've been crying my eyes otu reading all your responses. They are so helpful, and I want to tank you for them. I forgot to add beofre, that I know it sounds weird to be asking if its post partum when my girl is 15 months, but to be truthful I have been like this basically since i brought her home from the hopsital. I have fought against it a few times, and felt more normal, but I keep falling back into it. I dont know whats wrong. I feel like a waste of space. I feel like ALL I am now is a mum, and a wife. I want to be myself as well.

Answer 1

Yes, you are still depressed. Having a baby changes everything but it doesn't have to make you drift away from your husband.

Get to the drs. asap and tell him what you said above, if you aren't serious w/ the docs. they don't prescribe accordingly.

Is your husband helping you with the baby?
Like watching her so you can have some free time? If not, get started on a plan. You need to get out of the house without the baby say at least once a week maybe more. Go shopping, get your nails done, do something good for you.

Just because you've had a child doesn't mean you always have to take the back seat.
Once you get on some proper meds. make sure you kind of stick to a routine that takes care of the baby and you. Maybe dad can watch the baby while you take a long bath around her bedtime. It's ok for dad to do the bath thing, story telling and tucking in, that way when he's done, you'll be more relaxed and ready to hit that bed with your husband.

Try letting him hold you tonight and talk to him, don't keep it inside. Ask him if he can think of ways to help out more, but talk, you can't stop now, you have brought a beautiful child into this world and I want to know you are enjoying watching her grow.
There is a lot of help out there, maybe your husband is stronger than you think and he can help get you in the right direction.

If you work together on this, you will slowly get those feelings back out of love and respect for each other.
Give it a try, life is to short to stay this depressed for this long. And tell your husband you just need him to hold you, and explain and cry if you have too, but do talk with him every night ok? good luck and remember, you are someone special. You are you first take care of you. Let your husband in on how you are feeling and let him know how difficult the change in your body has been. Your hormone level is prob. way off too, might ask to have that checked.
Come on smile, who does your daughter look like? Get out to some classes where you and baby can spend the day with other moms.
I hope I've helped, but I really don't think you're going to look at things as bright as they could be without a little help and we all need that at times.

Answer 2

Depressed? Yes. Post-partum depression? No.

PPD usually occurs within the first 6-24 weeks post-partum, when your hormones are in flux due to breast feeding, delivery, lack of sleep, etc.

At 15 months post-partum, it would seem to me that there's more going on than just your baby. You need to see a counselor or a psychiatrist and work through your emotional difficulties. It sounds to me like you've lost your pre-baby identity (which is not uncommon), but in order for you to find your way back to happiness, you need a guide.

You may also want to come clean with your family and tell them that it is NOT your husband who's doing the family separation but rather you. Honesty is often very powerful medicine...."the truth shall set you free." Sound familiar?

Get some help and start talking.....

Answer 3

Go see your doctor and tell him what is going on. He will be able to help you.

Don't let your feelings rule you. Use your intellect over your emotions. Because your feelings will send you off the deep end if you let them. Use your intellect to decide if what you are feeling is rational or not.

Having a 15 month old child is very stressful even if they are well behaved. Especially the first child. You are not used to caring for someone else 24/7 sacrificing your self for them. You will feel the most exhausted as you have never felt in your life.

You should give yourself to your husband. Let him pamper you. Take the time to make your marriage right. You can not be totally self centered any longer, you are a wife and a mother. You do need to take some time a couple of times a week for just you. Have some one else watch your child and you do something just for you. That will help.

Answer 4

For the benefit of your baby and you, call your doctor's office and schedule a visit with the appropriate doctor who can tell you if the situation may be post partum depression related. If yes, follow their lead. If not, you may just need to deal with issues that were not a big deal when you had the freedom to make choices at whim without having to consider the long term repercussions of how it would effect an innocent child. Nonetheless, RESENTMENT of the child is the concern, especially if you truly have post partum......because it will PREVENT you from making sound choices. See a doctor ASAP!!!!!!!

Answer 5

You have to take all of it out cry with your husband or a friend but dont keep it inside !!! Talk to someone or get help !!! Is better for you and your new family ! Talk about your problems and whats bothering you, and let your family know that youre not being forced to do anything that you dont want

Answer 6

wow!this sounds like me 6years ago, it does sound to me that you have postpartum depression, but only a dr.can really say for sure, in 2001 i had a baby 1 week after my mother died i was 1200 miles away from home (we lived in maine we are from indiana) and within a three month span my husband cheated on me,kicked me out and put me and our kids on the streets..we got back together and then the depression hit .my mothers death,the cheating ,being homeless..it all hit me at once all i could do was cry, i didnt want sex, i felt like i was loseing my mind. i would panic so bad i would shake,cry i had thoughts of suicide i had never heard of postpd so i went to the dr. and he gave me a script for paxil, and within three weeks i felt so much better , there is no shame in taking medication if you have to , or even talking to a profesional about your feelings , for me even simple things helped , just getting my mind off myself, i would go for walks, help my bestfriend bake cookies, we even a a nobodys birthday night once a month we would buy this big birthday cake ,chill in our jammies and watch movies...anything to help you stand outside yourself really helps.depression tends to be a self pity illness well gosh! i hope i havent depressed you even more! omg! i hope if anything you relise that your not alone ..i know you feel that way sometimes, as far as finding out who you are again remember one thing...drop the guilt ! dont even for one second think you dont deserve a little you time..give your self a mini makeover, go tan , get highlights get your nails done get that kinky little number on and rock it like a rock star!

Answer 7

You sound like you may be a bit depressed, or maybe have some post natal depression, but you need to seek professional advice on that, so id suggest you go to your family doctor and have a good chat about your feelings.

You are a somebody, you are you, you are a wife, you are someones mum, you have a loving husband, and a lovely daughter who both need you.

I wish you goodluck and please seek some help in making you feel better. :)

Answer 8

Have you contacted your doctor? It is possible that you are suffering from post partum depression...or post natal depression as you say. You need to talk to someone NOW....this is serious...you don't want to go on feeling this way. You have a baby girl and a husband that loves you and need you. Please talk to your family doctor.

Answer 9

it sounds like you are depressed. it's hard for you to see anything good in your life when you are depressed. talk to your doctor about it and see if you can get on some antidepressants. you might not need them forever, but they will help. you also need to be talking to your husband about what is going on with you. i'm sure that he is feeling the stress from all this too. my hubby has depression and it's hard for me to deal with sometimes. but we try to keep things open about the way he is feeling.

Answer 10

Whether it's post natal or not, it definitely sounds like you should see your doctor. I've had kids and I know it can be really hard to be yourself after everything. Good luck!