that their husbands are children? I am an enlisted sailor in the US Navy. My wife and I have been together for 6 years and we have two children. She dropped out of school when we first got married and during the past 6 years she has done nothing to get her GED. Now shes calling me a child because of miniscule things I do around the house, yet she does not work to support our income. We have talked about this allot, but it just ends in a large argument. Now getting upset about being called a child is well...childish. When your called a child almost everyday while the person calling you a child has done nothing to further their education or assist with the income of the house then it gets on your nerves. Talking about it doesnt work.. WHAT SHOULD I DO!
She is good woman she takes care of the house shes just verbaly abusive.
2007-09-12 14:50:15 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
While her calling you a child is not exactly right, I can understand how she feels. I am the wife of a soldier and mother of six. She spends her days taking care of the house and kids and it is a BIG job. You are another person to take care of. I would suggest trying to help out a little more and explaining to her that you will do your part to help her out if she will respect you more. Marriage can't work if it lacks mutual respect. She can respect you more by watching her mouth and you could respect her more by not bringing up what she hasn't done, but thanking her for what she has done for you.
She gave up a lot to be your wife and the mother of your children. By staying home and taking care of the kids she is doing what is best for their future. She contributes to your household in more important ways than money. She can further her education later in life, but kids grow so fast and the early years are the most important.
2007-09-12 15:13:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The problem is that she wants to be a stay at home mom/wife and has no interest in furthering her education. You want her to grow and contribute more. You both are stuck in you individual "wants" and when the other person doesn't agree, you both resort to name calling. She is what she is and maybe once you accept that, and quit trying to turn her into an acheiver (by getting on her case)- she will have nothing to argue back at you with. At most you could hope that as the kids grow older and spend most of their time in school, maybe she can get a part-time job doing something she enjoys. A GED won't help much these days, especially if she doesn't care for a real career.
2007-09-12 15:09:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are taken what she says the wrong way men are very childish at times.It's funny but you men have a way of converting back to when you were little boys playing with your army men. For instants a cartoon comes on or them stupid Bud-lite commercials come on you laugh your a s s e s off. God forbid if you men can't find the remote control you start acting like babies.You can't find something around the house you run around like a mad person. Do you see what i mean and you putting her down because she isn't as smart as you isn't very smart on your part. Don't you know that the more you get on her about bettering herself the more she will fight you on the issue so leave her alone she will come around when you stop nagging her about getting her GED.This isn't about her getting her GED and you know it,you are ashamed and embarrassed that you have a wife that is stupid.You would like to see her do something to make you pride of her and pride to be her husband.When some of your friends start to brag about their wives you just listen and think to yourself,men i could of done a lot better.
2007-09-12 16:50:19 · answer #3 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit her down and explain that in order for your family to get ahead in life, it would be great if she could get a part-time job. Let's face it. If she doesn't have a high school diploma, it's not likely she is going to make much money so she will need to work when you can babysit the kids. She will never make any money paying for childcare and working. Be nice and ask her to help you. If she is unresponsive, make sure you don't have any more kids with her. When people don't work together as a team in a marriage, it eventually ends the marriage. Keep that in mind.
2007-09-12 15:01:12 · answer #4 · answered by Julie H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women have ALWAYS been this way. Whether or not any other woman wants to admit to it, it's our way of pushing a man to show his strength. Back in the day; men would give a hard smack of admonishment. (Yes, they did indeed! and no, it wasn't wife beating, because a smack and a 'beating' are different... let me assure you!) There's also the lowering your intelligence to her level so you can assure her you are definately not less intelligent.
How about I give you a hint. It's not about what you "don't do around the house", it's about the lack of attention/ priority she's getting from you. She'd like you to plan more alone time with her, something fun and new. (Kayaking, biking, dinner at a fancy restaurant, carriage ride downtown) But lay down the law man, tell her if she disrespects you again, you will allow her to leave if it's all that bad.
2007-09-12 15:11:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
HELL NO to answer you question!!! Look you are right- its verbal abuse!!! Obviously she has some insecurities that she can't deal with so she is lashing out at you. You need to bring this to her attention in a positive manner. Do it when it isnt an issue when she isnt venting. Out of the blue let her know that you notice she isnt happy with you and ask her what's really going on? Get to the root of the problem ... you being childish surely isn't it. every relationship should be built on respect and honesty. Try to get back to that if that's your mission, let her know. She can only respect that!
2007-09-12 15:06:32 · answer #6 · answered by ANALISE 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like she's taking her own insecurities out on you. She doesn't sound proud of herself for the contribution she makes to the house so she has to downplay your contribution to make herself feel better. It just happens sometimes. The other answer is right. Kill her with kindness and let her know that you appreciate what she does do instead of dwelling on her shortcomings and ask the same from her in return. Good luck
2007-09-12 15:03:50 · answer #7 · answered by B. Nowlin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you something because she is a good wife and takes care of the house and kids does not give her the right to talk down to you. perhaps she is angry because she has nothing else to do and she should try to get education and maybe than she will feel better about her self. you have been with her for six years and she hasn't even tried to farther her education at all. Let me ask you one question i see you go on and on but you haven't said that you are in love with her.
best of luck
2007-09-12 15:02:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell her how you feel about her calling you a child. If she doesn't have her high school diploma that really sucks because she doesn't respect you as much you need to be respected. You are doing everything you can to keep food on you table and roof on top of your childrens' head, and for her calling you a child is very childish of her because she is the one who is not trying to do anything about it.
2007-09-12 15:08:48 · answer #9 · answered by Stephanie A. 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Taking care of the housework alone doesn't make her a good woman. I'm sure she has some insecurities about being uneducated, but she doesn't have to take it out on you. I would never disrespect my husband. I respect him, and we work out any disagreements in respectful was without putting each other down. It sounds like you need to bring in a neutral third party like a marriage counselor so you can discuss your issues without her becoming defensive or going off on you.
2007-09-12 15:00:38 · answer #10 · answered by sanguis 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋